Mi'lord the Burg of Spam, your foulness pervades all. It is an honour to receive goadings from you.
Yes, mi'lord, continue.
Alright son, let's have a man to man talk. When a bee shoves it's huge veiny stinger up the flowers tight pink poophole, it's because the bee loves the flower very much. So when your uncle comes to read "50 shades" before you go to sleep, wearing nothing but pink wig and socks, it is perfectly natural for your peepee to get hard. Just remember that it's ok for someone from your family or for a priest to touch your privates, but you should never do it yourself! Jesus always stands behind your shoulder, and if your hands are in your pants, he will get upset and might make you go blind, or the hair will grow on your palms.
