Author Topic: 10things I learned playing cRPG  (Read 3803 times)

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Offline juv95hrn

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10things I learned playing cRPG
« on: June 30, 2013, 01:41:01 am »
+120
10   things I learned playing cRPG

Being somewhat new to the game I would like to share some hard earned knowledge to even newer players in the community. It is important to quickly understand what this game is about to not anger any of the demi-Gods that inhabit the realm of cRPG! Pay close attention and you might soon be as enlightened as one of them!

1. If you hear someone in your team whistling for a horse nearby, always kill any riderless horses around as fast as possible. If you see a team mate heading for a riderless horse and trying to mount it always jump in the air and overhead slash the horse, even if it means that you are team hitting your mate.

2. If you see a team mate being outnumbered on one side and a bunch of team mates outnumbering an enemy to the other side. Always barge in and team hit your friends in the back while they take down the overrun enemy. Your K:D is much more important than your team winning. Always swing against a heavily outnumbered enemy no matter what even if it means team wounding. Allowing people to safely dispose of him from his back while you defend yourself would be a threat to your divine K:D!

3. Similar to this, if you have a shield, never use it to cover a team mate being rushed by multiple enemies. Hold back and get a weak flanking 1H-swing in on one of the enemy group. Of course your score is more important than your team mate’s life.

4. If you have a buddy with a stabby long polearm behind you trying to help by stabbing enemies in front of on one side, make absolutely sure you sidestep and strafe in that direction to block him off and make him team hit you. Then report him! He is obviously trying to steal your glory and if you aren’t the one killing the enemy, who cares if your team wins, right?

5. If you are going to fight an approaching enemy and have nearby cavalry and ranged in clear terrain, make certain that you facehug your opponent so that your friends must either refrain from assisting or risk hitting you. Occasionally stepping away from your opponent to allow your friend to help you would be a sign of cowardice and thereby a very bad tactic. Make sure to report if you are teamwounded while using this superior strategy.

6. If an enemy in front of you is retreating under a rain of blows from enemies, make sure to stand directly in front of his path of retreat to stop him in his track and aid him recover his morale and stop and fight his enemy. Coming up alongside him to support him instead would take longer time for you reaching your kills! Once he is dead you will be there and take his place. This is especially important with regards to players with long pole arms. Since they need space to swing behind them, make sure you shove up close so you can hear that sound of encouragement to them when their back swing hits you.

7. If your entire team is setting up defensive positions along an easily defended terrain feature like a hill or so, make sure you charge in alone vs. the enemy. Since the sun of the cRPG universe revolves solely around you, your team must surely follow to support you in your glorious charge. If they are foolish enough to not do so, please keep up the excellent job of reminding them of their status as inbreed beginners (“tarded n00bs” in cRPG non-laymen terms) for failing to support you. Do not EVER forget to use CAPS for your important information!

8. If at any time you have the opportunity, kick your team mates! They will appreciate this and make you stand out as a hilariously witty and intelligent member of the cRPG community.

9. Always use your native language in chat. Just because it is an English speaking server and server rules say you should use English doesn’t mean you need to since you are exceptional. Using a native language Teamspeak is of course not an option.

10. At the start of a battle make sure to never, ever scan the battlefield and the involved forces and make a judgement of your and the enemies teams strengths and weaknesses. If you have lots of ranged, make sure you charge and never stay back and support them. If you have lots of cav, make sure to make a rush for broken terrain where they can’t help you. cRPG is a game of individual skill only and people trying to use cowardly methods like using common sense or team tactics only deserves looking down upon.

Follow these simply guide lines and you will soon fit right into the flourishing cRPG community. Welcome and may your K:D shine upon you!



« Last Edit: June 30, 2013, 01:48:22 am by juv95hrn »

Offline Tydeus

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2013, 01:57:56 am »
+24
New guy in town and he already understands how to play this mod. +1

I'd suggest moving this to the guides section, but then people might miss this great advice.
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Offline Leshma

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #2 on: June 30, 2013, 02:11:22 am »
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Quote
9. Always use your native language in chat. Just because it is an English speaking server and server rules say you should use English doesn’t mean you need to since you are exceptional. Using a native language Teamspeak is of course not an option.

Other points are somewhat funny and correct but this part makes you a douche. Show me where it says in server rules that you should write in English? I'm pretty sure if it does chadz or cmp will change it.

Offline Winterly

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #3 on: June 30, 2013, 02:25:18 am »
0
Other points are somewhat funny and correct but this part makes you a douche. Show me where it says in server rules that you should write in English? I'm pretty sure if it does chadz or cmp will change it.

Maybe he's referring to the NA server. Some brain-dead jerks will jump at the chance to go "MURICAA ENGLISH OR GET OUT"
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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #4 on: June 30, 2013, 02:31:27 am »
+1
Add something about forum trolls and how to approach admins, and your guide is complete.
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Offline Oberyn

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #5 on: June 30, 2013, 02:32:12 am »
+5
I must sadly agree with Leshma. Let me guess, your native language is english and you speak no other language? I'm sure the sight of squiggly foreign words you can't process must infuriate you, but this is also the case for many of the people that play this game, who have a weak or non-existent grasp of your language. Apparently they manage, or they learn. If you're so curious, you could just learn russian, or turkish, or whatever. I suspect you're just being an entitled douchebag though.
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Offline juv95hrn

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #6 on: June 30, 2013, 02:37:37 am »
+13
Other points are somewhat funny and correct but this part makes you a douche. Show me where it says in server rules that you should write in English? I'm pretty sure if it does chadz or cmp will change it.

Fair enough regarding the rules. I was misinformed. But personally I still think it would be more polite to attempt to communicate in english in the server if you are at all able. If that makes me a douche, fine.

My native language isn't english.

Offline FRANK_THE_TANK

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #7 on: June 30, 2013, 02:49:56 am »
+6
I suspect you're just being an entitled douchebag though.

Or perhaps those dirty foreign devils should speak normal.

Either speak American or gtfo.

----

That's some pretty blunt sarcasm :S

----

Let me regale you with a tale!

I was spending a long summers day chillaxing at the beach on the Goldy. The sun shone bright and the waves were glorious!

Many a boob was out on display.

I ran into some Japanese tourists from a city I had done student exchange in. They had a local dialect called Hakataben which I spoke pretty well so when I busted out with all this local slang they were very surprised.

We took off and went drinking and had a pretty rowdy time. As the evening progressed the lovely GC locals started to emerge into the hot summer night and it was at this point that things began to turn bogan.

Whilst sauntering down a secluded lane on our way to club happily jabbering in Japanese a duo of scum bag bogans appeared before us.

Their dry wit and quick smarts were something to behold. Upon seeing a white man speaking "gook" they promptly said "Hey bundle of sticks why don't you speak normal."

And hence forth English has always been known to me as, Normal.

So yeah, speak normal you fucking foreigners.
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Offline Leshma

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #8 on: June 30, 2013, 02:53:50 am »
+1
Fair enough regarding the rules. I was misinformed. But personally I still think it would be more polite to attempt to communicate in english in the server if you are at all able. If that makes me a douche, fine.

My native language isn't english.

Neither is mine, nor I'm particularly good at speaking or writing english. However I do prefer using English on game servers. That is because most people understand it and besides, english is the only language that makes it possible for me to communicate with majority of the player base. I'm not using it because it's beautiful language (it's fine imho).

But, not everyone speaks english in this community. Many players are young and come from countries where english isn't in use like in some western countries. Reason why they speak in their native language is not to annoy you, but to communicate with other players.

Assumption that everyone speaks and understands english language is why I used term douche to describe that particular paragraph of yours.

Offline Dooz

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #9 on: June 30, 2013, 03:01:30 am »
-5
10   things I learned playing cRPG

Being somewhat new to the game I would like to share some hard earned knowledge to even newer players in the community. It is important to quickly understand what this game is about to not anger any of the demi-Gods that inhabit the realm of cRPG! Pay close attention and you might soon be as enlightened as one of them!

1. If you hear someone in your team whistling for a horse nearby, always kill any riderless horses around as fast as possible. If you see a team mate heading for a riderless horse and trying to mount it always jump in the air and overhead slash the horse, even if it means that you are team hitting your mate.

2. If you see a team mate being outnumbered on one side and a bunch of team mates outnumbering an enemy to the other side. Always barge in and team hit your friends in the back while they take down the overrun enemy. Your K:D is much more important than your team winning. Always swing against a heavily outnumbered enemy no matter what even if it means team wounding. Allowing people to safely dispose of him from his back while you defend yourself would be a threat to your divine K:D!

3. Similar to this, if you have a shield, never use it to cover a team mate being rushed by multiple enemies. Hold back and get a weak flanking 1H-swing in on one of the enemy group. Of course your score is more important than your team mate’s life.

4. If you have a buddy with a stabby long polearm behind you trying to help by stabbing enemies in front of on one side, make absolutely sure you sidestep and strafe in that direction to block him off and make him team hit you. Then report him! He is obviously trying to steal your glory and if you aren’t the one killing the enemy, who cares if your team wins, right?

5. If you are going to fight an approaching enemy and have nearby cavalry and ranged in clear terrain, make certain that you facehug your opponent so that your friends must either refrain from assisting or risk hitting you. Occasionally stepping away from your opponent to allow your friend to help you would be a sign of cowardice and thereby a very bad tactic. Make sure to report if you are teamwounded while using this superior strategy.

6. If an enemy in front of you is retreating under a rain of blows from enemies, make sure to stand directly in front of his path of retreat to stop him in his track and aid him recover his morale and stop and fight his enemy. Coming up alongside him to support him instead would take longer time for you reaching your kills! Once he is dead you will be there and take his place. This is especially important with regards to players with long pole arms. Since they need space to swing behind them, make sure you shove up close so you can hear that sound of encouragement to them when their back swing hits you.

7. If your entire team is setting up defensive positions along an easily defended terrain feature like a hill or so, make sure you charge in alone vs. the enemy. Since the sun of the cRPG universe revolves solely around you, your team must surely follow to support you in your glorious charge. If they are foolish enough to not do so, please keep up the excellent job of reminding them of their status as inbreed beginners (“tarded n00bs” in cRPG non-laymen terms) for failing to support you. Do not EVER forget to use CAPS for your important information!

8. If at any time you have the opportunity, kick your team mates! They will appreciate this and make you stand out as a hilariously witty and intelligent member of the cRPG community.

9. Always use your native language in chat. Just because it is an English speaking server and server rules say you should use English doesn’t mean you need to since you are exceptional. Using a native language Teamspeak is of course not an option.

10. At the start of a battle make sure to never, ever scan the battlefield and the involved forces and make a judgement of your and the enemies teams strengths and weaknesses. If you have lots of ranged, make sure you charge and never stay back and support them. If you have lots of cav, make sure to make a rush for broken terrain where they can’t help you. cRPG is a game of individual skill only and people trying to use cowardly methods like using common sense or team tactics only deserves looking down upon.

Follow these simply guide lines and you will soon fit right into the flourishing cRPG community. Welcome and may your K:D shine upon you!

« Last Edit: June 30, 2013, 03:27:49 am by Kalam »
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Offline Muunilinst

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #10 on: June 30, 2013, 03:10:16 am »
+1
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Offline Macropus

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #11 on: June 30, 2013, 10:29:26 am »
+14
Oh, what a surprise.
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PS: nice guide btw!

Offline Ikarus

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #12 on: June 30, 2013, 10:55:10 am »
+1
Quote
make sure to stand directly in front of his path of retreat to stop him in his track and aid him recover his morale and stop and fight his enemy.
Especially in narrow corridors, you can perfectly block your teammates with a shield; if they try to get past you, kick em to make sure that they can´t block their foes behind em; make them learn their lesson for the next time! If you got a horse, you can block the coward more effeciently; if he TEAMKILLS YOUR HORSE (running gag) due to his cowardly distress, report him on the forum immediately.

Quote
If at any time you have the opportunity, kick your team mates!
Especially crossbowmen, reloading their super-slow arbalest! You can be sure that they´ll laugh about your pun and will love you forever!
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Offline chadz

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #13 on: June 30, 2013, 11:01:49 am »
+9
Fair enough regarding the rules. I was misinformed. But personally I still think it would be more polite to attempt to communicate in english in the server if you are at all able.

I actually agree. It's no rule, but it would help the community if everyone would speak english. If you don't speak english, learn it. That's what I did when I was young and new to the internet :)

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Offline Riddaren

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Re: 10things I learned playing cRPG
« Reply #14 on: June 30, 2013, 11:03:42 am »
+1
Leshma & Oberyn: How does it make you a douche if you prefer to understand what people write?

This has nothing to do with people who can't speak english.
It's about those who can speak english but decides not to.

I could speak Swedish all the time, but I don't.
Because it wouldn't be polite against al lthose who can't speak Swedish.