CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)

[TugBoat]

Looshus did not confirm me as an authorized grader at this time, but I am almost done grading them.

Some of these are rough to even get through, LOL.  Some are actually very good, but none have a perfect score so far.

Once I'm done should I post my findings, or wait for Looshus's blessing?

TugBoat's is perfect

[Penitent]

TugBoat's is perfect

It could be!  I haven't gotten to yours yet. ;)

Man, this is a lot more work than I thought it would be LOL.

[Penitent]

I have graded all the essays.

(click to show/hide)

oh god, please kill me.  I can't believe I read ALL of those.

I have all the grades and mark-offs in an excel spreadsheet.  That doesn't mean a winner is declared, because Looshus still has to approve of my grading.

I'll send him what I got and see what happens!

Edit:

(click to show/hide)

There were 25 essays.

All grading was conducted per Looshus's instruction regarding point deduction.  I only graded those that met the word minimum.
Where there was any gray area, I gave the benefit of the doubt to the writer.
All more obvious grammatical/spelling errors were deducted with a vengence.

Essays were given a minimum score of -100.  Some would have gone much below that, believe it or not!

Scores ranged from -5 to -100

[Gomer]

I have graded all the essays.

(click to show/hide)

oh god, please kill me.  I can't believe I read ALL of those.

I have all the grades and mark-offs in an excel spreadsheet.  That doesn't mean a winner is declared, because Looshus still has to approve of my grading.

I'll send him what I got and see what happens!

Edit:

(click to show/hide)

There were 25 essays.

All grading was conducted per Looshus's instruction regarding point deduction.  I only graded those that met the word minimum.
Where there was any gray area, I gave the benefit of the doubt to the writer.
All more obvious grammatical/spelling errors were deducted with a vengence.

Essays were given a minimum score of -100.  Some would have gone much below that, believe it or not!

Scores ranged from -5 to -100

Are you going to release this spread sheet out of curiosity?

[Penitent]

Are you going to release this spread sheet out of curiosity?

i'm not sure if I should before Looshus is back and approves of it.  It may cause more problems than it satisfies.

I'm not sure though...

[TugBoat]

I think this is all one big troll lol

[IR_Kuoin]

Soooo, what score did I get? 

[Turkhammer]

I wish i was a grammar chocolate chip cookie.

Too bad you missed that lesson in grade school.

[Gomer]

Too bad you missed that lesson in grade school.

WHAT I LEARNED IN BOATING SCHOOL IS

[Penitent]

Soooo, what score did I get? 

You received a -31

[//saxon]

You received a -31

....Minus thirty-one!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaHAHAHAH never laughed so much...

[SeQuel]

I think this is all one big troll lol

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[Penitent]

it's not a troll!  Loooshus is an upright an honorable man.  He's just...um..very busy!  Yeah!  You'll see.  He'll show all of you!   

[Mlekce]

The unfortunate assasination of chadz.
By A_Hot_Elf_Princess
Fief of Glunmar Elementary School, Grade 3

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One day in the enchanted forst a elf was playing game on her computer (it is made of vines and leafs and the mouse is a big acorn). She was a elf princess. She was playingh the game "CRPG" for Mound & Blade computer game. the elf was playing realy good and was at the top of board. She shooted her bow and hit pheasant. She shotted her bow and kill a horse. "Sorry horsey" she said, but it wasnt the horses fault. His owner was an Evil Night. Then she shooted the Evil Knight because he was SLOW and made a fat joke at him.
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   The evil night died but he came back soon. He was really angery and told his hole team “kill the elf she is not worth living!” They couldnot find her because she was in the hey stack and hiding. The evil knight said “we have lost our pray, now we wil have to find someone else to get!” and all the bad soldiers agreed. As they marshed across the land kiling everyone, the Evil Night turned around and told them “wait our own guys is archer” and they killed the archer and there score went down but they did not care because they were very angery mob.
   The Evil Knight found his new target later. It was the king of the city chadz. He was a good king and gave coins to his pesents so they could go buy a candy bar at the store if they harvestered all their wheat and finched their home work on time. But the Evil Nihgt was angery about his died, and he went to fight king chadz.
King chadz was havin a feast right when the Evil Night attacked. He said “oh not now!” and stood up real fast. His food fell, all the equus africanus asinus hambubgers, his smashed potatos, all the peas, and even his milk got spilled.
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   The evil night nocked on his castle door and said “chaz I come for you’re blood now! I lost my hunt and now you will pay!” chadz was scared because his army was on vacation at Disney world this week. They went to the beach too and drank out of a coconut. He put on his armor and sord and says to himself “I will do my best but I cant beat them all allone”
Juts then, a window breaked and the elf princess came in. she said “elfs are good at hearing and I hear you are in troubel good king.. that bad night is after me” they made a high five and kicked the door to go  beat the Evil Night.
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Evil night was listening the whole tim and he was ready to murder! He took out his big axe and said “come fight me I will chop your head off! And then I will kick it out the window!” his army was so scared they hided under the tables and slipped on chadz’s spilled food.
Chads fought with honor and power but the evil night was making a rage at him. He almost nocked the sord out of chaz hands seven times! The elf princess took out her bow & arrows and made her aim. She waited for the perfect time to shot her arrow into the evil night and make his end.
She let go of her fingers and the arrow went. chadz moved in the way and it went threw the middle of his head and he died
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WHAT THE FUCK. EVERY TIME. TAKE OFF THAT HELMET IT IS MADE OF MAGNETS THAT SUCK MY BODKINS RIGHT INTO YOUR BRAIN YOU TARDJOB. PRESS M. I DARE YOU PRESS M AND SEE WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENS NEXT
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Holy shit this is good. 

[Penitent]

Loooshus has returned. 

He sent me a message advising that he approved of my efforts.  However, he is in the process of recovering the password for his account so it may be some time before the awards are given out.  Of course there is only one winner with the best grammar, but Loooshus also made special request to award those with exceptional story telling ability and/or heroic effort and creativity in the composition of their essays.

I will do my best to do my duty to be a fair and honorable steward of the esteemed loom library essay contest redistribution awards process!

There will be a grand prize for best grammar
a prize for best story telling
a creativity prize
perhaps an honorable mention

I'll have to review the essays again, and also see what kind of loom spread we are dealing with (how many +1, +2, +3's) before it can be decided how many looms are awarded for each prize.

I'll post if I learn any more!