Author Topic: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)  (Read 31065 times)

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Offline Blackpoint

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #120 on: June 08, 2012, 01:36:37 am »
+1
Hey Son of Odin read my story :/ 

Offline LordBerenger

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #121 on: June 08, 2012, 02:20:17 am »
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MrShine and Thorvex aren't in Fallen last time i checked.

That's why i said ALMOST everyone.


Derp
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Offline oohillac

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #122 on: June 08, 2012, 02:26:11 am »
+1
Thanks for the support.  Always nice to have men behind me.

Offline FRANK_THE_TANK

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #123 on: June 08, 2012, 03:00:00 am »
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Oh oohillac, you dirty perv you!
Fammi un pompino!

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Offline RandomDude

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #124 on: June 08, 2012, 03:52:19 am »
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Man this story is getting out of hand, im gonna have to finish it tomorrow.

Offline Garem

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #125 on: June 08, 2012, 04:51:18 am »
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For the record, this is not Oohillac's first gay-fan-fic. It's something of a special indulgence of his.
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Offline oohillac

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #126 on: June 08, 2012, 04:57:56 am »
+1
One day, The Rise of Ramses shall be posted to the world.

Offline Son Of Odin

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #127 on: June 08, 2012, 05:02:55 am »
0
One day, The Rise of Ramses shall be posted to the world.
I already have soundtrack for it :mrgreen:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwcRXbVC4k8

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« Last Edit: June 08, 2012, 05:10:00 am by Son Of Odin »
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Offline ZigZag

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #128 on: June 08, 2012, 06:53:11 am »
0
                                                                              chadz: THE TWISTED PRINCE                                                     
                                                                                          -written by ZigZag                       
              ACT I

Within the wild, hot, urban areas of Rome lurks a rat amongst the market district of the city. The rat runs quickly between the unusually crowded district, trying to avoid the marching feet of men as it steals a piece of cheese from a merchant's stand.
The merchant notices the rat, he tries to whack it with his wooden bread roller and off goes the rat, sprinting his way towards victory.
As the rat races to escape the market district a steel boot slams down upon him, the guts and fractured bones immediately spread out on impact, turning into a pool of blood with pink tissue displaying it's open wounds.
The soldier wearing heavy armor with the symbol of the Royal Guards on his chest, holding with his shield and spear within his hands, he looks down onto the unexpected blood pile.
"For fuck's sake..." the soldier curses his luck as he spits on his boot and tries to smudge his boot within the sands next to the road, trying to clean off the bloody mess.
Someone hits the side of his shoulder, he turns around.
"Come on, we don't have all day, he'll be here soon," says the soldier with the same uniform as him, as he marches past him.
"Great, just my luck" the  soldier sighs and follows his fellow comrades.
From the distance walks the newly elected prince named chadz.
The  Royal Guards form around chadz, surrounding him with their shield and spears and start marching by his side as he passes through the cheering crowds.
Wearing the traditional robe and golden bracelets, the new prince walks as a God in the eyes of many.
As chadz walks near the gates of his royal palace, he stops to give a few words to the people of Rome.
"How wonderful it is to have such an enthusiastic audience!" shouts chadz.
The people of Rome cheer wildly. The Royal Guards become slightly stunned by the volume of the crowd.
"I have great respect for our people and our soldiers!" chadz continues.
chadz notices the soldier's bloody boot as he looks around him, "seems like the even on such an event our soldiers are stained with blood, what hard working animals they are!" chadz implies with humor.
The crowd bursts into a quick laughter and cheer, the soldier shakes his head in disbelief.
"I have plans for the future of Rome, I'll see to it that my people see through the eyes of our soldiers, the blood stains still mark us all through the wars we've been through, we are strong, thus the enemies of Rome cower!"
The crowd bursts into a cheer once more, and chadz enters his palace.
               
                  ACT II
chadz sits next to a luxurious, long, dining table covered with silk and silvery, amongst him sit his advisers.
"What would the structure contain?" asks his adviser.
chadz looks up after taking a sip of his wine, "the arena will contain the slaves, prisoners, and for special events, soldiers of Rome."
The adviser nervously responds, "I do not believe displaying such chaos to the public would be an the brightest idea... if I'm to be honest... your majesty.."
The adviser continues as he gains more confidence within his statement, "displaying such activities to the public could bring an uprising, disorder, violence, and perhaps even resistance by the common folk!"
chadz responds with a firm statement, "this is Rome, I believe you are forgetting who we are, the Colosseum, as I'm going to name it, will provide true entertainment to the people as well as prepare our soldiers for true war."
chadz continues, "I want people of Rome to know what a true battle looks like, it will make our people stronger, instead of covering their poor eyes with coin and food, I want them to experience something they have never experienced before."
chadz looks at a distance, takes another sip of wine from his glass and ends his argument with a few last words, "it will be beautiful."
The adviser nods his head slowly in agreement, knowing he cannot win the argument against the wishes of the prince.
                  


               ACT III (Narration)
And there it stood, the great Colosseum, a gigantic structure within the heart of Rome. chadz wasn't lying, it sure did look beautiful,  such architecture was phenomenal, but as the saying goes, looks can be deceiving. 
As the spectators watch a man cleave other man's body in half with poleaxes, guts being ripped out in the open, swords being thrust with so much strength to pierce another man's armor and penetrate his lungs, men being dragged alive by rope cavalry until their skin peels off, all the so called 'horrors of war' were shown to the people.
The people cheered and cheered, chadz was a hero, a genius, a God in their eyes. Such a wonderful idea brought by a fresh prince, such a bright future he has ahead, he gave the Roman people a structure that thrived their culture, trained their soldiers, and punished their prisoners.
Men being torn apart as chadz sits in his high chair and sips his wine while giggling to his fellow advisers that attempt to humor him.
One of chadz's advisers named Adino complained how he didn't like archers within the arena, for they would put down some of the best hand-to-hand warriors with ease, however chadz told him to get over himself, the best warriors would know how to dodge an arrow he assured Adino, however Adino wasn't satisfied and continued arguments with the prince which got Adino removed from position of power and into becoming target practice for the archers within the Colosseum. Adino ended up taking twelve arrows around the anus as an embarrassing punishment before he bled to death, the crowd and chadz had a long laugh.
The people loved the Colosseum, everyone thought it was a wonderful idea, that is of course... except the prisoners and slaves. 
Every day the guards and merchants would bring in new prisoners to provide a few minutes of entertainment to the spectators as their blood bath begun.
The greedy merchants of Rome would collect bets on their slaves to earn some profit on the prisoners they see fitting for battle.

                ACT IV
On a brand new day within the Colosseum, a mysteriously weak man was brought in chains. There were more guards than usual escorting this man to his cell.
The inmates struck their hands against the metal bars within their cell and roared  in order to attempt to frighten the fresh recruit to the arena.
The mysterious man ignored all inmates and walked with the help of the guards around him, for he walked as if he was about to fall, he had a drunken look on his face.
Some of the inmates laughed at him, the others just lay in a corner waiting for their time of doom within the arena.
The guards finish escorting this man to his cell and lock him up with Boris, a very muscular  Bulgarian warrior.
Guards start to read the introduction letter of this man to the rest of the inmates.
"We...could not find out what this man's name was, he has no history, only that he killed 48 Roman soldiers with what appears to be... a..." the guard stops reading in confusion and hands it over to a guard next to him, whispering, "does this say... dance..?"
The other guard grabs the introduction letter and continues, "a dance... by running left... and then right.. then left.. therefore, they named him.. ZigZag.."
The guards looked at the prisoner and laughed, "wow, our  soldiers must of drank themselves to death with wine because they had no idea what the hell they were witnessing!"
One of the guard turns and shouts in laughter at Boris, "be careful there big guy, don't let this ZigZag fella do his little dance in that cell, we still need you for the upcoming battle!"
Boris takes a glance at ZigZag.
ZigZag falls over and passes out.
A new day rises, Boris stares at ZigZag as he slowly sobers up.
Boris attempts to begin a conversation with ZigZag, "a weak little man, slaying 48 Roman soldiers? Is that true, or just a stupid joke?"
ZigZag is still unbalanced, he tries to get up and answers, "how should I remember, I did have some great booze though!"
Boris shakes his head in disrespect and walks out to the training room.
Within the training room, Boris keeps watch at the guards as the other inmates practice battling each other.
ZigZag slowly approaches the training area, he grabs a wooden sword, and swings it at another inmate with unbalanced force, his wooden sword flies out of his hands and the other inmate knocks him down unconscious with a blow to the head.
Boris shakes his head at the stupidity he has just witnessed.
Several days pass, and the time for battle is near.
Boris sits in a corner whispering to himself and ZigZag tries to stand up without falling over on his head.
As the guards open the gates, the crowd of inmates pass through each other, Boris slowly walks behind the inmates as the others walk out the main gate.
The announcer starts introducing the inmates to the audience.
"Good evening everybody! In today's field of glory we have prisoners of war!" the announcer shouts with an excited tone.
"First, we have Rangon the long haired barbarian that beat three royal guards into pulp with his bare fists!"
And so went the introductions to over eighteen men.
The announcer went on as ZigZag was brought to the front, "here we have one of the most dangerous man you'll ever meet!"
The announcer continues, "this man, apparently  killed 48 Roman soldiers by..dancing! by.. dancing folks! Therefore, he has been nicknamed.... ZigZag!" 
chadz whispers to the other advisers in humor, "what a joke, this man doesn't even look like he could grab a sword without flipping himself over."
The crowd laughs, even the announcer starts giggling at what he has just read.
Announcer reads on to the next letter, "next we have Boris, the Bulgarian hulk!"
The crowd and guards try to find Boris, but he is nowhere to be seen.
The announcer hesitates, "well, I guess he slept in today! No worries, he'll be brought shortly...I'm sure...he's a big guy, won't be difficult to find!"
The battles begun as the inmates work together to slaughter the other faction within the arena, the cavalry tears a few men down with their mighty lances.
The lance cavalry almost pierces ZigZag, however his slight movement positioned himself in front of the horse where he got knocked unconscious.
While ZigZag is passed out on the ground, the enemy faction preys on the other inmates.
Rangon manages to take down the cavalry until he takes an arrow to the neck and bleeds out hopelessly.
From the royal dining table comes shouts of soldiers.
The battle is paused for a brief moment to resolve the issue.
Boris, disguised in guard's armor is dragged towards the arena.
Boris shouts and attempts to break out the grasp of the guards, "You all pigs! You watch men get slaughtered and laugh! How dare you laugh at my fallen brother! How dare you laugh at my fallen friends as if this is all a joke! I damn you all to hell!
chadz whispers to his advisers, "Oh, all of you are in for a show, this happened before, I found an effective technique to take out the imbeciles of Rome.
chadz shouts, "Perform the penetrating punishment!"
Boris spits on the ground as he is dragged to the center of the arena, he is then forced to bend over as the archers shoot twenty-four arrows around his anus before he bled to death.
He cursed, he resisted,  but in the end he shared the same fate the unfortunate adviser,  Adino.
The shouts and screams of pain by Boris forced ZigZag regained consciousness, as he was the only one remaining from his faction while the other faction had a single archer still standing from afar.
chadz starts laughing, "what a show! This drunk bastard is actually awake to finish the battle! One on one!"
chadz claps his hands, "more wine please! Now this.. is a show."
The servants bring in fresh bottles of Roman wine and pour to refill the empty glasses for everyone sitting within the royal seats.
The archer shoots an arrow toward ZigZag, as ZigZag turns left.
chadz sips his wine and whispers to his advisers, "let's see if all this talk about this 'ZigZag' guy is true."
ZigZag turns right. The second arrow misses.
The third arrow heads toward ZigZag, he turns further right and it misses.
chadz and his advisers laugh, "this must be that ridiculous dance they were talking about! Ha-ha!"
chadz continues, whispering to himself, "left, right, right, left.. Ha-Ha!"
Sixth arrow comes flying near ZigZag, scratching him by the arm as he turns left.
chadz gets a bit dizzy, almost as if he drank too much wine.
ZigZag turns left, left, right, left, right, right.
chadz starts feeling  as if he is seeing hallucinations of ZigZag turning left and right. Flash, left, flash, right, flash right, flash left.
chadz's advisers are slowly becoming unconscious as well.
chadz's shouts, "Stop it! Stop it! Just stop already for fuck's sake! Oh my lord!"
The archer, with no arrow left in his quiver after firing over fifty times, looks up at chadz.
The crowd silences and the guards come to attention.
chadz slowly tries to get up and falls over on his head, his advisers pass out as well.
The crowd looks horrifically at ZigZag, who shortly falls over and loses consciousness once again.


Fin

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« Last Edit: June 08, 2012, 02:13:42 pm by ZigZag »

Offline ZigZag

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #129 on: June 08, 2012, 07:00:45 am »
0
The formatting was pretty annoying.. and I added the Spoilers at the bottom ^ 

Don't read the spoilers until you finish reading the story.
« Last Edit: June 08, 2012, 02:12:31 pm by ZigZag »

Offline Gomer

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #130 on: June 08, 2012, 07:20:07 am »
+1
Let me write you a 500 word paragraph about chadz murder.

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Offline Garem

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #131 on: June 08, 2012, 08:10:42 am »
+3
Thunder Crashes Lightly
A 1916s espionage-thriller in wartime Austria.


The rain and sleet beat down against the brim of the walker's hat. He stomped through the hoarfrost that covered the sidewalks, trudging onward purposefully and tightening the stiff collar of his greatcoat. It was dark, and it was cold. It suited him perfectly. Lightning flashed between the clouds as if it were fearful of the ground, illuminating the dark cityscape and with its ominous towers. Far, far away the echoes of an artillery siren rang. The Austrians feared it, and rightly so. But he did not. He knew that nothing would interfere. It came from the top.

He ducked suddenly into a dark alleyway, the noise from the street cars and the panicked howls of those caught unprepared in the storm dying away. All he could hear was the dampened roar of wind, rain, and thunder. Without guidance but for the flashing bolts in the heavens, he made his way to a steel door. He knocked, and it was opened without further rapport.

The door attendant was a grimy visage- about fifty, his simple clothes dirty and with bags hanging under his bloodshot eyes. The walker observed the man's motions and demeanor, even without words determining that he had clearly made use of the powder recently. Although there wasn't a doubt to begin with, it was certainly gone now- he was in the right place. The walker passed the second door and the eruption of subtle music emitting from the Edison Amberola phonograph in the corner being bated by the clatter of silverware, wineglasses, and chattering laughter of the city's wealthy in their well-hidden retreat from the miseries of war. Here, they held the illusion of security, a privilege not affordable to the downtrodden and estate-less masses.

The walker removed his greatcoat, draping it across his arm and placing his hat in a tight grip. He moved slowly now across the room, listening to the various tongues - French, German, and even some English - which could not be heard during this era of war in anywhere less secluded than this den of privilege. He moved towards a woman in a scarlet gown, a comely and elegant matriarch whose vivid dress defied her pale and austere flesh. As he loomed near, she withdrew a parcel from beside her without so much as a glance his way. A dish of the Oriental powder rested before her and her cadre of younger men. He took the parcel and carried on. Another woman, this one in a revealing sapphire dress, twitched as he passed as she succumbed to whatever substance she had been given by the dark Cossack man seated beside her. The room took no notice of her passing, and neither did the walker.

He passed a curtain of beads and ascended the stairs at the end of the dining room. They were dark, the candles not having yet been lit. He marched up the ominous marble stairs, which were it not for their great breadth would have felt like a dark and ancient castle. The walker ascended several floors, windows now visible. The storm had not abated and there were several hours still until dark would yield to dawn. He reached the highest floor, glancing out the window to the miserable streets below as another bolt of lightning crashed in a deadly cadence with the shelling of artillery flashing several miles in the distance.

He turned back to his business. The walker tore loose the thick paper wrapping around the parcel and took its contents before ascending the last flight of stairs. Up the final flight, he took notice of the surroundings. Ancient art lined the hallway. Oriental tapestries covered the southern wall, and Renaissance statutes graced the north. The place may as well have been a wing of the Palace of Versailles. War was bad for many, but it had been exceptionally lucrative for some.

The walker's ears were alerted to the sound of a soft harp playing from a port down the corridor. He moved quickly, quietly towards the sound. He placed his greatcoat and narrow-brim hat upon an elegant, cushioned chair. The soft sound of an effeminate voice sang softly from beyond a wooden door cracked open ever-so-slightly. He peered into the room, where a roaring fire crackled softly in line with every note of the harp, guided in song by the slender fingers. The room, perhaps a library before its current possessor had taken it, was filled with the odds and ends of the world meant to satisfy the whims of one who was not yet a man, but neither was still quite a boy. The young Austrian strummed from a short, padded stool. Around his feet were sundered treasures. A globe cleaved in twain by an ancient axe on one side, an old ledger of some sort butchered on the other with a trail of torn papers in a line towards the fireplace, and a bow of Near-Eastern origin smashed against an old and abused child's toy horse. A plate of tin soldiers lay at the harpist's feet, sprayed across the floor in anger.

He pushed the door open. The long-faced harpist took no note for several seconds, his long mane of hair brushing into his eyes and lost in the sounds of his own creation. When he glanced up, it was far too late to cry if there had ever been a chance at all. The walker had leveled the pistol at the Austrian - a gilded Colt 1911 that must have cost the woman in scarlet a mighty sum. It felt frigid, even through his gloves. The walker waited for the proper moment. The harpist had stopped his melody, but made no words, only giving a soft whinny as a tear rolled down the his face. The window, covered with drops of rain and frost, flashed suddenly. The thunder crashed lightly, concealing the violent voice of the pistol.
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Offline IR_Kuoin

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #132 on: June 08, 2012, 08:57:03 am »
+1
Still waiting for Joker's 4 pages essay
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Offline Thovex

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #133 on: June 08, 2012, 09:22:54 am »
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Thanks for the support.  Always nice to have men behind me.

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« Last Edit: June 08, 2012, 09:28:57 am by Thovex »
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Offline Gomer

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Re: CraZy Loooshus, CrPg Loom giveaway and essay contest. (17 loom points)
« Reply #134 on: June 08, 2012, 09:25:03 am »
-1
If I write a ligit full 20page cRPG story will I win? If not I don;t wana :P
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