The unfortunate assasination of chadz.
Long time ago,there was a man called chadz.
He owned a gay teen support website-
www.chadzboyz.com,he was really rich because of it. All the teenage gays asked solutions for their gay problems,and chadz helped them. When the gays grew up and started working,they donated thousands of euros to chadz,because he helped them so much.
Some day chadz realised that boys don't really interest him. When he was at cmpxchg8b's party,he met a beautiful woman. Her name was Joanna. chadz really liked her... He fell in love with her. When he asked her to go eat some burgers together,she said yes. Then,after the meal,chadz asked her to be his girlfriend,and they kissed,which means ''Yes'' I suppose.
chadz and Joanna were such a perfect couple. They loved eachother so much,that they decided to marry. Their wedding was in the middle of summer,in chadz' beach house. Only close friends and family,no real party. The wedding was wounderful,and everyone was happy.
chadz and Joanna lived together for 1 year,everything changed- chadz closed hes gay teen site,because he didn't want Joanna to know that he was a gay. chadz recieved a lot of messages from young gay boys,full of insults and rage,but he ignored them.
So they lived further,Joanna was happy,chadz was happy. One day,Joanna realised that she's pregnant,it was a boy. chadz started to cry from happiness when Joanna texted him about that.
After 9 months Joanna was giving birth to their boy,he was strong and beautiful. chadz was so happy about hes new life,but sometimes when he was shitting,he remembered about his gay past. He was like:''Oh,damn.The feeling when having a dick in my mouth,mmm...''. He missed these times,but he also loved his wife and kid.
Few weeks later chadz was in depression,he couldn't decide what he likes better,dicks or vaginas. He was cutting himself,eating vegetables and watching midget porn. His wife was very worried about him,she called a doctor.
Doctors name was Garry,he said that chadz was in a very bad depression,he was unpredictible,he could get mad any second. Joanna was scared,she was afraid to go close to chadz. chadz was sitting in the toilet,scratching his toes and eating toilet paper. Then Joanna ran out of patience and went to talk to chadz,she said:''How are you chadzy,what's wrong with you?'' After this,chadz got mad and yelled at her:''AAAHHH!!! FUCK OFF,I HATE YOU,I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!! I'M GAY!!!!!!'' And chadz ran away,into the woods.
Years passed,chadz had a long beard,he painted it white and his hair aswell. He made himself a staff,so he can scare away the wolves,like kinngrimm. chadz was walking through forest,and then a wild spacesnip fell on the ground few hundred meters away. chadz wanted to kill the aliens. He ran to the spaceship as fast as he could. Then he finall saw it,it was made of aluminium,actually it looked like an aluminium ball with antens. Then,suddenly,the door on the spaceship opened,lots of smoke came from it,and then chadz saw an humanoid in the doorhole,it was smaller than normal human,and it was very hairy. It was a hobbit. The hobbit started talking in foreign language,and then other hobbits came out in the field. The hobbits looked angry,and they were slowly moving in direction of chadz.
One of the hobbits shouted:''GANDALF TI SI DEBELI PEDER!!'' Then the other hobbit said:''Jebi materi pičku i pui me govna Gandalf!''
chadz was like:''What the fuck?'' Suddenly,the hobbits charged at chadz. chadz was outnumbered,but he wanted to fight and die like a real man. chadz grabbed a rock from the ground and threw it at one of the hobbits,the rock hit the hobbit in the head,jamming the skull and splitting up the brain. Hobbit was dead. Then one of the hobbits jumped and scratched chadz in the face. chadz started to punch the hobbit in the stomach,then the hobbit started to puke and fell on the ground. Next hobbit got hit in the chest by chadz' staff,the staff pierced hobbits' ribs and left lung. The hobbit fell down and died from bleeding. Fourth hobbit had an axe,he threw the axe,and hit chadz in the leg. chadz fell over. Then more hobbits started brutally mutiliating chadz. They were kicking him,punching him,biting off his fingers,cutting his torso with knives. chadz died. One of the hobbits took chadz' staff and relised this isn't Gandalfs staff...
Morale of this story: Don't be a gay teenager. And don't grow a long,white beard,so Gandalf hunting hobbits don't kill you by mistake.