How come nobody has brought up the absolutely incomprehensible idea he put forth regarding something about linking
ping to heirlooms?
Clearly, a player with a lower ping has an advantage over a player with a higher ping. So, to conclude this point: Give heirlooms based on ping rather than time invested into the game. But in what manner could such a system possibly be implanted, you might ask. Well, you see, myself being a jack-of-all-trades, as well as a genius, I have already come up with the answer to your woes (now you may sleep soundly at night). The solution would be to apply heirloom bonuses on items at a tick which would occur once every x amount of seconds. X is a specified range of numbers, one of the numbers in this range will be chosen at random, and will define what the timer is for the next heirloom tick. The range of x could be anything, but the range 1-60 seems like a solid base to start with. Anyway, this bores me, I am sure you can figure out the rest without me holding your hand.
I'd ask if he was high or something but we already know that by that point he must've been peaking. What the fuck does this even
mean, dude? During a round your items would randomly gain bonuses or something? Based on ping? I guess for higher ping players the chances would be greater? How does that fix their inability to hit anybody in the first place due to lag? You are far from divinely inspired, man. At this point I'm convinced you suffer from a mild retardation.
In all seriousness, though, how hard is it to just write a few words on how you're sorry that you're a cheating douchebag, you realize you are a douchebag, and you will exhibit 100% less douchebaggery in the future? Look, I just wrote the essay for you.
chadz, server mods, please just permaban this kid's IP from the game and the forums and shut this shit down. If he's really sorry he'll move out of his parent's house just to play again. If not, no big loss. In fact, no loss at all.