cRPG

Off Topic => General Off Topic => Topic started by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 02:43:29 am

Title: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 02:43:29 am: Or are you you yet?

When did your opinions stop changing? Can you look at what you said three years ago and agree with it? Is Leshma2011 the same being as Leshma2015? My own theory is that people solidify their personalities around age 25 or so, and before that their behavior can change radically even within a year or two. Certainly, I cringe when reading some of my older posts, and Xant2012 isn't the same person as Xant2015.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 28, 2015, 03:24:14 am: I've become aware that not all people mean good at each other at 13. Kinda late, but was oblivious to it prior to that age. At 18 started caring less about things in general, after nearly drowning. Before had that burden of not disappointing other people, but that went away with all the water I spit that evening. Glad it happened that way, I was feeling empathy all over the place and our world revealing itself to us every day, layers of sugarcoating melting away... "hardening" process would be tough for me if I was pure and naive soul to this day.

Quote
When did your opinions stop changing?

Never. My opinions and basically everything except true feelings (irrational) is purely situational. As it should be. Sticking to something despite everything changing around you every second is human trait, but doesn't really make any sense. It is like going with x being 5 no matter how many times output of formula changes. Being stubborn and sticking to your personal belief system for years is an option, but doesn't mean is the right one.

Quote
Xant2012 isn't the same person as Xant2015.

Xant2012 and Xant2015 are the same. First was into playing cRPG, second is into forum game known as trolling. You have different expectations from this, that doesn't mean your irrational soul changed.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on July 28, 2015, 04:19:44 am: At fifteen, I had the will to learn; at thirty, I could stand; at forty, I had no doubts; at fifty, I understood the heavenly Bidding; at sixty, my ears were opened; at seventy, I could do as my heart lusted without trespassing from the square.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: njames89 on July 28, 2015, 05:29:51 am: I love eating chocolate chip cookies
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Gravoth_iii on July 28, 2015, 07:19:31 am: Ive probably changed more than i realise but around 15 is when i kind of became me i guess. Since then then it feels like ive had a similar mindset towards everything, my opinions on things are still constantly changing though.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: chadz on July 28, 2015, 09:07:49 am: That is a surprisingly good question from Xant :wink:

Can't really answer that. Stumbled upon some old messages/post from myself that didn't sound like my current self at all. But I don't think I'm already myself, as I imagine I will change a lot in the future, also considering that I'm learning a lot of stuff right now, both personally and professionally.

It's actually an intriguing thought to be still developing. Keeps things interesting. I think I would be worried if I would stop and say "this is me, and will be, for the rest of my life"
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Gnjus on July 28, 2015, 09:12:31 am: Xant became Xant after they ripped his anus in the army, there's nothing more to it than that. Now he's trying to act like a tough internet guy around here, I wonder how he acts IRL.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: [ptx] on July 28, 2015, 09:50:08 am: I feel like I've not changed a great deal in the last year or so. I'm 25.

--edit: scratch that, I have changed quite a bit. Most of it for the better.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 09:51:41 am: Quote from: chadz on July 28, 2015, 09:07:49 am
That is a surprisingly good question from Xant :wink:

Can't really answer that. Stumbled upon some old messages/post from myself that didn't sound like my current self at all. But I don't think I'm already myself, as I imagine I will change a lot in the future, also considering that I'm learning a lot of stuff right now, both personally and professionally.

It's actually an intriguing thought to be still developing. Keeps things interesting. I think I would be worried if I would stop and say "this is me, and will be, for the rest of my life"
I suppose "whether your opinions are still changing" is a bit inaccurate, as those will of course keep developing over time, although perhaps not on major issues. A better way to phrase it would be "when did your world view solidify?"

That's hard to put "scientifically" as well, of course. The best measure is what you said, "didn't sound like my current self at all."

Also, in regards to me, I'm not talking about any kind of general behavior or posts, I mean specific serious posts that I've made and that give me some insight into how I thought at the time. That's one of the interesting features of forums, btw, being able to go back ten years and look what you said then. My earliest posts on the internet are from 2003 or so, although I actively try to forget.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Daunt_Flockula on July 28, 2015, 11:30:35 am: 25 is truly the time around which your character starts to solidify. I am 30 now and I believe I will continue to change for a longer while. Probably there won't be a time when I will believe I have reached ultimate maturity. Looking back at 3 years ago, I really haven't changed a lot, but I am still changing. On the other hand, the most valid truth I have discovered so far is that even the personal qualities you previously thought were hardcoded in you can be changed, depending on the circumstances and your willingness to carry out that change.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Zergmar on July 28, 2015, 11:39:51 am: I hope I'm not me yet, because this is pretty disappointing. But I agree with the 25 thing, definitely a point where things became clearer.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leesin on July 28, 2015, 01:31:14 pm: You are you now, but I believe the older you get, the more you become you, yet you never stop changing even if it's the most tiny of changes you wouldn't notice unless you compared yourself to yourself over a 10 year period, the complete version of you is only when you are brown bread.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Hirlok on July 28, 2015, 01:42:35 pm: You stop changing and evolving - you dead.

I respect the hermits meditating on mountain tops and probably not changing their view of the distant world too often. I have been close to that.

But usually people that are too "settled" in their minds and hide behind a fake-certainty just have not found the next step or are desperately avoiding it.

There are a few core values - but even these are challenged sometimes.

It's a game, the roleplaying rulesets are crap and can be bent, and there is no level cap.

Personally - I am deliberately remodeling and re-inventing myself and my life atm @ 47, not for the first time, and I'm quite sure it won't be the last time!

P.S.: just noticed the turbulent big changes seem to show up around every ten years or so, at least for me.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Gravoth_iii on July 28, 2015, 03:24:17 pm: Quote from: Hirlok on July 28, 2015, 01:42:35 pm
You stop changing and evolving - you dead.

I respect the hermits meditating on mountain tops and probably not changing their view of the distant world too often. I have been close to that.

But usually people that are too "settled" in their minds and hide behind a fake-certainty just have not found the next step or are desperately avoiding it.

There are a few core values - but even these are challenged sometimes.

It's a game, the roleplaying rulesets are crap and can be bent, and there is no level cap.

Personally - I am deliberately remodeling and re-inventing myself and my life atm @ 47, not for the first time, and I'm quite sure it won't be the last time!

P.S.: just noticed the turbulent big changes seem to show up around every ten years or so, at least for me.

I must be in the desperately avoiding it state right now then, but what im avoiding im not sure of..
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 04:28:41 pm: The funny part is that we tend to think of ourselves as this solid, whole thing that is a "being" and has a name and a fixed value of "I"ness, instead of a random collection of atoms doing different things, in a state of constant flux. The whole "I" idea is painted on, a psychological defense - or rather, a requirement for self-conscious beings to be able to function. So we are our own enemies when it comes to not being able to change, if you let go of your fantasies of self, anyone can change into almost anything. People stop changing when they think they've stopped changing, when their self-image becomes fixed in their minds, a mask that they stick to because it's familiar and comfortable.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Daunt_Flockula on July 28, 2015, 05:02:27 pm: It is the whole "the child is father of the man" arguement. It is thrown at you so many times during your lifetime that it eventually becomes a self-defense mechanism. Change is scary after all. It is easier to encase your escapism with a social dogma than to face it.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Molly on July 28, 2015, 06:00:35 pm: I'd say everyone is changing all the time, every day even. I guess it's more about the rate or amount of change you're going through...
I was a completely different person 3 years ago before I had to go through a huge personal loss. Certain things in life can change a person drastically over night.

I believe that nobody ever reaches his true self.
Except some Buddhists maybe. Their whole religion rotates around finding their inner self, being one with oneself. And that process includes reincarnation, so it's probably a hard thing to do! :lol:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: xxkaliboyx on July 28, 2015, 06:31:25 pm: I try to answer the best I can from my phone and come back later with a better post. But you are you at a very young age, you just don't know it yet.

I'm in a related career field. I have to sell to a population that what I'm selling is in their best interest. So in fact I have to convince a population that whatever I'm selling is good for tgem (without force). How do I do that? I study them, I found out what makes them, them. Ok, how do I do that? I find out their values, morals and beliefs. Now I promise you that every person have these 3 traits whatever they are and of course they are expanded from there. I will explain those 3 later but they are shaped by parents, religion, needs, poltical, region, etc. All these are instill at a very young age. Yes they can change by something called significant event but your moral, view and belief are still there. Think about it, are your parents religionish? You probably will be too. Does your religion teach you that stealing is good if it's for a good cause? Did you learn that at a early age that you take into adulthood? That is one small vague example. But I stand that you become you at a young age. Your significant event will tweak here and there.

Sociology, anthropology, psychology are more source material if your on your way to a university.

Edit: sorry for my English, English is my first language
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Tiger on July 28, 2015, 06:47:03 pm: I've thought about it before. My biggest changes were in 8th grade and in senior year high school, but I can still relate to senior year.

We never stop learning and changing. We are forever students in every stage of life.
Here's something I'll always be looking at in my career.
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Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 06:54:38 pm: Quote
Edit: sorry for my English, English is my first language
Ironically, this actually makes sense after having seen how the vast majority of Americans and Brits write.

As for the rest of your post, I disagree with almost all of it. We cannot be "us" at a very young age because we don't even know how the world works yet. The biggest change comes when people reach the stage where they are capable of abstract thinking (each to the extent that they are capable of) and start making up their minds. This would be something like 15-16, and the decisions and worldviews are shaped by and with youthful arrogance. Over time these views get refined, until at around 25 people tend to have enough world experience to have complete enough models of the world and how it works to reach their final(ish) conclusions. There are individual differences, of course, and illusions can shatter when a close friend dies or whatever, and thus changing things up again. But in general, you'll have figured out the things you're going to figure out by 25ish.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Golem on July 28, 2015, 06:58:52 pm: If you ever stop changing, you probably just stopped noticing it. ;)
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 07:03:17 pm: Of course
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Falka on July 28, 2015, 07:03:58 pm: Quote from: Xant on July 28, 2015, 02:43:29 am
When did your opinions stop changing?

When you die. There's no magical age at which you become the truly "you", reach some final and ultimate stage of your evolution and development, which is not gonna change a bit in the next years. At the age of 70+ you won't be the same person as you're now, half century younger. And that's not the time what changes us, or at least not only the time. THe knowledge which we get, experiences which we get through year after year, that's what determines if and how you change.

Though at the same time I think people don't really change since a pretty young age, not really. Of course as you become wiser, more aware, acquire knowledge about "surrounding world" and so on, your opinion on a lot of subjects is gonna change, but everyone has certain set of features, virtues and flaws, which somewhat defines you as a person and which doesn't really change. I am and probably I will die as the same flegmatic, oversensitve my old friendget which I was at the age of 15, because that's who I truly am :P
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Molly on July 28, 2015, 07:53:48 pm: Quote from: Xant on July 28, 2015, 07:03:17 pm
Of course you never stop changing entirely. The point is that, from my anecdotal experience, most people do reach a stage eventually that they can identify with even later in life. After some point you'd no longer look at your past self and think "who was that guy? Why did he ever think like that?" I'm not talking about isolated opinions changing.
But... what happens if a major single incident in your life at a middle age changes you in drastic way?
Are you still *you* after that? Are you the same *you* which solidified at 25 years?
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Mr_Oujamaflip on July 28, 2015, 08:06:49 pm: I don't believe there is a definitive version of me. I've often felt like I'm not who I should be but recently I've concluded that it's because there isn't anyone or anything specific I should be.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 08:15:22 pm: Quote from: Molly on July 28, 2015, 07:53:48 pm
But... what happens if a major single incident in your life at a middle age changes you in drastic way?
Are you still *you* after that? Are you the same *you* which solidified at 25 years?
No, hence:

Quote
There are individual differences, of course, and illusions can shatter when a close friend dies or whatever, and thus changing things up again.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Molly on July 28, 2015, 08:34:11 pm: Ahh, didn't see that :oops:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Armpit_Sweat on July 28, 2015, 08:49:52 pm: I'd say 27 for me.
Nothing really happened since. Saying the same, enjoying the same, and generally having no new ideas of any kind. It's all the same in a slightly new wrapper.
It's sad, but not that much. I love vagina, weed and visual entertainment. Good enough for me! No regrets. I just wish to keep those comming, on and on.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Thomek on July 28, 2015, 08:58:22 pm: Great great question..

To talk about myself first.. I think the core of who I am has been surprisingly much there from very early age. Probably since what.. 3-6y old? Imo the most important years. Then of course lots of hard earned life lessons.

One thing though, I think I've benefited immensely from being quite mobile every year between 18-26 or so. Every year a new place to study or work, be it army service, studies abroad, or just a different university/school. It gave me the chance to kind of Reset who I am, and figuring out my flaws. What problems are truly my own, and what problems has more to do with others. Kind of starting with blank sheets of paper, allowing me to figure out who I am and who I want to be.

I think it has made me a much better and more interesting person in every way, thus my advice to anyone who feels stuck, or think they are at the end of some road: MOVE. Sometimes, it is your friends, or even those you love and love you back that keep you in invisible chains.

There's a great passage in a famous norwegian book by Aksel Sandemose. The last chapter, and it goes something like this:

- I was once on a hunting trip around Halfway Mountain, a relatively unknown mountain in the inner parts of Newfoundland.
It is strange to see how such a mountain becomes something completely different than it was, every time you have travelled a little around it and look at it again. You can get one thousand descriptions of it, and all of them are equally true.

I feel an urge to tell you this now. That the mountain is big, and that is has many faces, but the one that laid in chains on the earth, only saw Halfway Mountain from the place where he was.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Algarn on July 28, 2015, 09:04:36 pm: The time, the knowledge you acquire, and the experiences you live change you. And since we always live experiences, we can't stop changing or anything. If you stop learning, or living experiences, then your end is near, and then you'll have more or less reached your final stage. I changed a lot within 2/3 years, and I expect to change a lot again in the next 5 years, and this until I die.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Falka on July 28, 2015, 09:06:22 pm: Quote from: Thomek on July 28, 2015, 08:58:22 pm
I think it has made me a much better and more interesting person in every way, thus my advice to anyone who feels stuck, or think they are at the end of some road: MOVE. Sometimes, it is your friends, or even those you love and love you back that keep you in invisible chains.

See, we all got what I call a life trap, this gene-deep certainty that things will be different, that you'll move to another city and meet the people that'll be the friends for the rest of your life, that you'll fall in love and be fulfilled. Fucking fulfillment, heh, and closure, whatever the fuck those two-- Fucking empty jars to hold this shitstorm, and nothing is ever fulfilled until the very end, and closure-- No. No, no. Nothing is ever over.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 09:11:37 pm: Quote from: Algarn on July 28, 2015, 09:04:36 pm
The time, the knowledge you acquire, and the experiences you live change you. And since we always live experiences, we can't stop changing or anything. If you stop learning, or living experiences, then your end is near, and then you'll have more or less reached your final stage. I changed a lot within 2/3 years, and I expect to change a lot again in the next 5 years, and this until I die.
How old are you?
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Algarn on July 28, 2015, 09:14:09 pm: Quote from: Xant on July 28, 2015, 09:11:37 pm
How old are you?

19 in 2 months.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Thomek on July 28, 2015, 09:16:48 pm: Quote from: Falka on July 28, 2015, 09:06:22 pm
See, we all got what I call a life trap, this gene-deep certainty that things will be different, that you'll move to another city and meet the people that'll be the friends for the rest of your life, that you'll fall in love and be fulfilled. Fucking fulfillment, heh, and closure, whatever the fuck those two-- Fucking empty jars to hold this shitstorm, and nothing is ever fulfilled until the very end, and closure-- No. No, no. Nothing is ever over.

Well in my experience.. (and I'm jesus age) is that things WILL be different if you move and learn from those new places. Maybe not in the first place you go to, maybe not the second. But keep moving, and try to stay open and not judgmental. These things are usually just shields to protect your ego and make stuff easier to cope with. I used to think a lot of bad things about myself (and others), but now I laugh of all the energy I spent worrying about that shit. Be it girls, success, or life in general.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Falka on July 28, 2015, 09:21:26 pm: :wink:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 28, 2015, 09:31:33 pm: Quote from: Algarn on July 28, 2015, 09:14:09 pm
19 in 2 months.
Uh, so, did you read the thread? You're 18 and you're saying how you've changed a lot in the past 2-3 years. Well, no shit. You can't really say anything one way or the other before you're older, your brain is still very much maturing.

It seems like about half the people in this thread miss the point, perhaps because they never even read the replies, and are talking past the subject.

There are some great posts too, though.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Ikarus on July 28, 2015, 09:34:40 pm: Everytime I look at old pictures of me, I think to myself "gosh dude, you had NO idea about nothing. I´m so glad I got better than this during the years." And then, some years later, I look back at some pictures from that time and think exactly the same thing. And I´m really happy about that. I hope I´ll never get into the situation where I think to myself "Gosh, look at me back then, it was so great. And now I became so terrible."

Especially when you´re an artist, you always compare your current works with your old works. And you always think "gosh, I thought I was kinda good, but actually I sucked really hard.". Until some years pass and you look at pictures from that time... :mrgreen: It´s kind of a neverending struggle, but it keeps you moving.

Kinda like this
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and yes, I could really slap myself when I was 16, 17, although it was a tough time back then
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Macropus on July 28, 2015, 09:36:46 pm: Quote from: Xant on July 28, 2015, 02:43:29 am
Or are you you yet?
Not yet, and that's a good thing I believe.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Kafein on July 28, 2015, 11:04:19 pm: Just wanted to reply that I'm a bit worried about learning that Leshma is a worshiper of the Drowned God.

On topic, I am not the same as I was when I started writing this post. That seemed like an absolutely great joke.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: njames89 on July 28, 2015, 11:34:57 pm: I remember reading somewhere that all cells in your body turn over every 7 years or so. Probably has something to do with that. #learneditfromtheinternet
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 28, 2015, 11:37:51 pm: Quote from: Kafein on July 28, 2015, 11:04:19 pm
Just wanted to reply that I'm a bit worried about learning that Leshma is a worshiper of the Drowned God.

Leshma, cRPG module and main protagonist of Dark Souls series.

What is dead may never die, but raises again, harder and stronger.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 28, 2015, 11:42:22 pm: Quote from: Thomek on July 28, 2015, 09:16:48 pm
Well in my experience.. (and I'm jesus age) is that things WILL be different if you move and learn from those new places. Maybe not in the first place you go to, maybe not the second. But keep moving, and try to stay open and not judgmental. These things are usually just shields to protect your ego and make stuff easier to cope with. I used to think a lot of bad things about myself (and others), but now I laugh of all the energy I spent worrying about that shit. Be it girls, success, or life in general.

Quote from: Marius
"Why did I follow him...? I don't know. Why do things happen as they do in dreams? All I know is that, when he beckoned... I had to follow him. From that moment, we traveled together, East. Always... into the East."

Are you Aidan, the dark wanderer, perhaps?
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Algarn on July 29, 2015, 12:22:22 am: To answer to the question in the original post, I guess it's around 20 and 30 years that you are defined at 90% (lifestyle, opinions, beliefs, etc), and you can call that "yourself". It all depends on how early you did realize what is surrounding you, if you are aware of that world at 15 in its , you'll be accepting the world like it is at 20, and find "yourself" around 25 years old. Still, people who have one or several major events in their life can be "broken", and change almost entirely, become someone else, that they can call themselves afterward, without being proud necessarily of it. Traumatized soldiers for example need to accept the world again, and build back themselves from nothing.

My opinions thought.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Kafein on July 29, 2015, 12:30:48 am: It's funny to watch 20-somethings discuss about the impossibility of a midlife crisis.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Ikarus on July 29, 2015, 01:52:26 am: Quote from: Kafein on July 29, 2015, 12:30:48 am
It's funny to watch 20-somethings discuss about the impossibility of a midlife crisis.

it´s an impossibility when you never leave puberty

If I ever get out of puberty, I´ll go straight into the midlife crisis :lol:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Tibe on July 29, 2015, 06:42:29 am: Well im 22. I changed a fuckton in 3 years. From one of those socially akward asshole computernerd teentypes with bad hyigene who have absolutely no passion for anything in life and live of off their parents money with no shame at all, to a legitimately decent young adult. I kinda like my new self. Looking forward to seeing what il be in 25.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Falka on July 29, 2015, 07:03:42 am: Quote from: Tibe on July 29, 2015, 06:42:29 am
Well im 22. I changed a fuckton in 3 years. From one of those socially akward asshole
to a legitimately decent young adult. I kinda like my new self.
Quote from: Teeth on June 15, 2015, 11:57:26 pm
Adult life and changing life priorities definitely caught up with me now at age 21 Really glad about that,

Great minds think alike

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and so do a lot of really stupid ones.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 03:49:17 pm: 22, 21 years old, decent young person who like to socialize with people...

Well I don't fucking like to socialize with people and I'm 29. Why the fuck not? Because I work with people and people at work are fucking hyenas. They wait every opportunity to fuck you up and put themselves in front of you.

Of course there are people you call friends that won't do such a thing and of course I have them and like to hang around with them. But I would never call myself as a person who likes to socialize with people because to me that sounds like I dig most of the people I'm in contact with. I fucking don't, most are assholes to me (or anyone else for that matter). That is how life works, you have handful of friends, bunch of fake friends which are the same as your enemies. Most people will act negatively towards you and you'll want to strangle them in your mind :mrgreen:

Wait for ten years to find a proper job where not everything smells like daisy, where your boss is an asshole (every boss is an asshole if you let him/her) and then say how you are enjoying not being socially awkward. Believe at that time you'll wish to go back to young age when you that strange kid and only thing that will change your mind will be your newly founded family (if you have any by that time).

But to tell you frankly, out of all people you internet avatars are by far the worst. Because you have no social brake of any sort and tend to be more rude than any asshole irl you'll encounter will ever be. World where we are 99% of the time communicating online without some changes (consequences for online actions) will be personification of Hell.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: [ptx] on July 29, 2015, 03:58:31 pm: And it's that time of the year again.

We are more rude online than we would be IRL, because IRL we wouldn't be communicating with you, Leshma :wink:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Paul on July 29, 2015, 04:05:57 pm: People's personalities change over the years. His does within minutes.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 05:38:47 pm: Just writing what first comes on my mind, without previous check what it looks like. This is a great way to vent out some everyday frustration, these forums. Guess I'm not the only one who uses this place with same purpose. Heskey seems doing the same.

I don't really mean anything I've written in my 10000 posts.

Quote
We are more rude online than we would be IRL, because IRL we wouldn't be communicating with you, Leshma

Neither I would with you, hate skinny hipster fuckers. Especially if they come from Baltic states :wink:
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 29, 2015, 06:18:07 pm: Quote from: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 03:49:17 pm
But to tell you frankly, out of all people you internet avatars are by far the worst. Because you have no social brake of any sort and tend to be more rude than any asshole irl you'll encounter will ever be. World where we are 99% of the time communicating online without some changes (consequences for online actions) will be personification of Hell.
Whatever do you mean, dear? I'm a great guy, everyone says so.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Tibe on July 29, 2015, 09:00:22 pm: Quote from: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 03:49:17 pm
Well I don't fucking like to socialize with people and I'm 29. Why the fuck not? Because I work with people and people at work are fucking hyenas. They wait every opportunity to fuck you up and put themselves in front of you.

The general rule of thumb is that when you think everyone around you are cunts, it either means you stick around in a crowd that's overall bad, or you are the cynical cunt yourself.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Jeade on July 29, 2015, 09:12:37 pm: Always late to these.

I'd say I became myself somewhere around age 15 or 16. I went through a pretty rough patch at the time, particularly being excommunicated from the Presbyterian church (who even knew they still did that?).
It's not a fun time, as the whole grounds of excommunication means that literally everyone in that church community completely cuts ties with you.
Growing up in a small town, that meant essentially everyone I knew. Parents are (of course) exempt from the rules of excommunication, but having only your parents is really shitty when they're the prime reason you've been excommunicated.

I was still largely identifying with pacifism at the time, and that's since changed.
I assume that, since growing up, I've realized there's a lot of totally fucking retarded people in the world and pacifism isn't always an option.
It was making a change from idealism to realism. I'm still all for de-escalation, but that doesn't always work either.
The rest of me is still a filthy liberal.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Xant on July 29, 2015, 09:16:25 pm: Why did you get excommunicated? I thought that only happened in Medieval 2 Total War.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Grumpy_Nic on July 29, 2015, 09:22:10 pm: Still havent managed to be completely me. Still working on myself
(click to show/hide)
or should be, too lazy atm
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 10:04:48 pm: Quote from: Tibe on July 29, 2015, 09:00:22 pm
The general rule of thumb is that when you think everyone around you are cunts, it either means you stick around in a crowd that's overall bad, or you are the cynical cunt yourself.

What you do for a living if I may know?

Doing IT freelance stuff is great, working in huge vertical organization is not. Too many busybodies who are waiting an opportunity to climb over your back. Constant gossiping, clan structures, malicious people...

At least it is a state job, could be a bank... my relatives work there, it is particularly cruel place.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: The_Bloody_Nine on July 29, 2015, 10:23:22 pm: I don't think I will ever become me. But it definitely takes increasingly more years to think of myself as an idiot in retrospective.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Jeade on July 30, 2015, 01:27:10 am: Quote from: Xant on July 29, 2015, 09:16:25 pm
Why did you get excommunicated? I thought that only happened in Medieval 2 Total War.

heh. I was open about the fact that I had serious doubts if there were a God or Jesus or whatever.
I'd grown up in a very fundamentalist Christian home, and the church community was very much the same.
One girl was excommunicated after she admitted to having premarital sex once. She felt terrible about it, came out to say that it happened, and was then excommunicated.
They actually took her up in front of the whole congregation and made her tell everyone what she did. That caused a split in the church.
A few years later, I was excommunicated for questioning my faith. Quite a strange thing to do when Christianity is supposed to be all about inclusion.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Kalam on July 30, 2015, 03:11:12 am: Five seconds ago?

By The Bloody Nine's metric, I suppose it's about a year and a half ago.

I was raised in a similar environment, Jeade. It's taken a decade to be able to talk to strong religious believers without dismissing them outright, except when it's directly pertinent. That's a change, like others that happen every day. I don't know if there is an age where I became 'me', and I'm on the wrong side of 25. Like you, I've moved away from pacifism to something less pacifist. Besides social issues, I'm more concerned with implementation of ideas rather than the ideas themselves.

The best way to judge this is to figure out if a passive watcher with access to every detail of your life would be able to accurately predict who you might be in five years with consistency. That's impossible, so the next best (still horrible) thing is to try and imagine if I could've seen who I would become at any given point, and what I would be most surprised with.

There are times when you get to see people who you once knew you well but haven't interacted with in awhile, and that seems like another decent gauge. You've all mentioned online records of past interactions, and admittedly those are usually the most surprising, since it's often unequivocal proof of an entirely different thought process.

Few elements have accompanied me throughout my life, besides a fierce anti-authoritarian streak, a disregard for tradition, and restless curiosity. And the first two didn't manifest until I was, oh, probably about ten.

However, if I am the same person next year as I am today, there's something wrong. You see, I'm not quite smart enough to have it all figured out. I hope I look back and see an idiot, because if I do not, then chances are...I'm an idiot.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Tibe on July 30, 2015, 07:10:08 am: Quote from: Leshma on July 29, 2015, 10:04:48 pm
What you do for a living if I may know?

Doing IT freelance stuff is great, working in huge vertical organization is not. Too many busybodies who are waiting an opportunity to climb over your back. Constant gossiping, clan structures, malicious people...

At least it is a state job, could be a bank... my relatives work there, it is particularly cruel place.

Currently front-end web, but not freelancing. And the people seem great. Right after school I did some shit jobs too and the people and the bosses were also understanding and nice. My mom did cosmetics, her coworkers and bosses were okay. My dad, well some of the coworkers arent exactly the best, but he hangs with the guys that are cool. I got family in many fields. Realestate, law, other IT, even fucking McDonalds, none of them have ever claimed that the people they deal with daily are cunts. They do complain that the job is hard, but thats it. So you see...thats why I have really no idea what you are talking about.

And doing freelance IT is not great, if you are not lucky, as far as ive seen it. You can get burned really badly and you are defenceless to some stuff, you would never have to worry about working for a corporation. Atleast where I am, where there is a need for people in IT, in organizations, the employers have to bend themselves a little more to accomidate their employees. Being a cunt, just straight up makes your top programmers and developers leave and join another firm, potentially leaving you with an office-full of rookies. Which happens very often. I've heard yeah, that in Bulgaria, Belarussia etc, the abundance of skilled IT workers is insane, but the demand is so small, the workingconditions and the pay aren't that high.
Title: Re: At what age did you become you?
Post by: Gnjus on July 30, 2015, 08:18:45 am: visitors can't see pics , please register or login

When I first saw this thread I thought it was gonna be "At what age did you start wanking" or something like that.