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Off Topic => General Off Topic => Topic started by: JennaHaze on March 04, 2015, 10:42:11 pm

Title: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 04, 2015, 10:42:11 pm
Ye boi im going to give sum advices and answer yo questions.

First of fuken all forget everything you know.

Lets get started m8. So lets think that you are a loser pussi with 30 cm biceps(you are a bundle of sticks). You aint going to get any gurls bro time to get ripped. Get a gym membership first because getting all that fuken gym shit is expensive. Now you have to learn your body type.

Ectomorph: Dude i can count your bones. Wtf are you 50 kg or what? Your waist and your shoulders have equal width you have sixpack because you are thin. If you are this bundle of sticks then sorry you are an ectomorph.

Mesomorph: You lucky fuk. Narrow waist bold shoulders best body type for an athlete or someone wants to do sports. You can easily get muscles but be careful you are pure mesomorph every mesomorph is a hybrid of meso and ecto/endomorph. If you have fat and muscles you are endo-mesomorph if you are thin but have muscles you are ecto-mesomorph. Best bodytype.

Endomorph: Well. You are doing this shit at hard mode im sorry. Endomorph is stronger than ecto and meso can easily get muscles but you have trouble with your fat dude. Its hard for you to lose fat and if you cheat on your diet i have bad news for you easy fats 4 u fam. But it doesnt mean that you cant have a shredded body im gonna give advices bro dont be upset.

Now fitness tips from 2Bach. The rapper and a classical music composer.

Cardio:

Doing cardio before your workout makes you gain less muscles. Because doing it makes you have less GH(growth hormon ffs) 3 times less than a person who doesnt do cardio before workout(hitting the iron you phaggot).

For ectomorphs: stay fukken away from cardio you tiny shit.

For mesomorphs: well. ummmmmmmm.... if you want to get shredded and get low fat percent do cardio 2 times a week between 1-2 hours. but only if you have a fat percent below %12 and shit.

above  that fat percent and endomorphs: you need to move your ass. do cardio after your workouts for 30-40 minutes. and if it is your off day dont stay at home and fuarking do cardio fam. go for a walk or sth.

doing cardio after workouts will make you burn fat from the muscle you trained easier.

workouts:

if you want to shred that 20 reps shit is bullshit. does your heart beats faster your face gets red when you do 20 reps with lightweight or you do 5 reps with heavyass weights. think about it. sweat is fat crying if you dont sweat you aint going to get shredded.

you want to get bigger? you want to quit miring and get bigger? nice! more reps make your GH raise. and of course not with lightweight. you need to do it with the right weight. for example you are going to do 12 reps with 4 sets. at the end of that 12 reps you shouldnt be able to do 13th rep. thats the right weight. rest between 60 to 90 seconds. and hit the iron again. if you are new in gym train 2 muscles in same day but if you are gym rat i suggest 1 muscle but you fuken must train that shit hard.

supplements:

protein powders: this shit contains different shit. all brands have different products contains different things with different quantities. first you must look at protein and carb it contains. high protein low carb is better. but its not only about this 2. there are different aminoacids, BCAA and other shits like glutamine,creatine, taurin, fibers, oils in them check all of them and choose the correct product for yourself.

BCAA:Branch chain amino acids (BCAA's), valine, leucine and isoleucine, make up approximately 1/3 of muscle protein. BCAA's reduce muscle fatigue, speed recovery, decrease the loss of other amino acids from muscle during exercise and help the body absorb protein. perfect shit bro.

aminoacids: there are 22 aminoacids. they divide into 2 groups:

essential aminos: histidine, isoleucine, leucine, trpytophan, lysine, methionine, phenylanine, valine

non-essential aminos: alanine, arginine, cysteine, cystine, aspartic acid, glutamic acid, glutamine, hydroxyproline, proline, serine, tyrosine.

your body can produce non-essentials but you must get essentials from foods or supplements for your health and muscle growth. there are different brand and products with different effects i use beef amino of universal i get the best results with it but you must find yours yourself.

glutamine: glutamine is a non-essential aminoacid. you might ask wtf bro you told about aminoacids enough that shit. but nop! this one is real deal. increases GH, lets you burn more fat, faster recovery and of fucken course strength increase!. since its a single shit all brands are equal just get the cheapest one per service.

creatine: gives energy to your muscles. its made of 3 aminoacids. gives real good energy its inside of pre-workout drinks but you can consume it without them. downside of creatine is it makes your body hold water (i think my english is not enough to describe this sorry) your body contains more water and you cant get rid of it till you stop using creatine it will always hold water.(you can get rid of it but it will hold water again)

carnitine: you all see the ads all around internet and tv. miracle! turn fat into muscles! BULLSHIT. they talk about carnitine but its not the way it works. carnitine lets you burn more fat. make your heart beat faster so you can sweat more. also increases your body heat so you can sweat even more! but it doesnt help you get more muscles its lie. also fat and muscles are different they cant turn into other!

pre-workouts: gives energy but for a short period. contains carnitine, taurin and shit gives you energy.

these are main supplements there are lots of this shit like fish oil, gaba, etc. you can search them on internet im not google. :?

foods/drinks help burning fat: berries, oat, yoghurt, spice, spinach, tomato, pepper, peanut butter, orange, lime, lemon, cucumber, carrot, apple, asparagus, broccoli, cabbage, garlic, celery, bean, grapefruit, almond.

more muscles you have=more calories you burn. also more protein you consume=more calories you burn because while shattering(i dont know the true word for it) your body consumes energy. omega 3-6-9 are important for you you can get omega-6 from peanut butter but you must get them equally so i suggest you to consume fish or fish oil.

these are all i can remember for now if you have questions or if im wrong please tell me.

get big or die mirin'


Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 04, 2015, 10:42:35 pm
i have no life...
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: jtobiasm on March 04, 2015, 11:05:48 pm
(click to show/hide)

http://www.bodybuilding.com/
http://www.simplyshredded.com/


We are all gonna make it brah
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Asheram on March 05, 2015, 12:27:38 am
visitors can't see pics , please register or login

Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 12:36:30 am
Quote from: JennaHaze on March 04, 2015, 10:42:35 pm
i have no life...

careerbuilder.com

You need one.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Christo on March 05, 2015, 12:36:35 am
Running for longer periods can save your life, lifting weights for show muscles won't give you enough stamina to even fight consistently.

/thread
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 12:37:09 am
Quote from: Christo on March 05, 2015, 12:36:35 am
Running for longer periods can save your life, lifting weights for show muscles won't give you enough stamina to even fight consistently.

/thread

Bring guns to a fist fight

/thread
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Christo on March 05, 2015, 12:38:54 am
Bring tanks to a gun fight

/thread
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 12:41:11 am
Bruh don't even need to lift

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Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Clockworkkiller on March 05, 2015, 01:18:56 am
if you want to get strong,respec and put more points in STR attribute

duh
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 01:32:54 am
If there aren't fat people in your new game imma riot

Fat cop manhunter needs to happen
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: SixThumbs on March 05, 2015, 03:19:39 am
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Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 10:25:34 am
Quote from: Asheram on March 05, 2015, 12:27:38 am
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SPONGEBOB SQUATPANTS
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: LordBerenger on March 05, 2015, 01:49:44 pm
Quote from: Christo on March 05, 2015, 12:38:54 am
Bring tanks to a gun fight

/thread

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Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: F i n on March 05, 2015, 02:00:57 pm
no
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: WarLord on March 05, 2015, 02:03:45 pm
Quote from: JennaHaze on March 04, 2015, 10:42:11 pm

doing cardio after workouts will make you burn fat from the muscle you trained easier.

if im wrong please tell me.

get big or die mirin'

Bold part is definitely wrong, everything else is right.  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Austrian on March 05, 2015, 03:22:04 pm
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Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Xant on March 05, 2015, 03:47:08 pm
Quote from: Christo on March 05, 2015, 12:36:35 am
Running for longer periods can save your life, lifting weights for show muscles won't give you enough stamina to even fight consistently.

/thread
Or anything else, have you seen "bodybuilders" trying to help with moving people, they look like they're dying after fifteen minutes of lifting things
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 04:30:40 pm
Quote from: LordBerenger on March 05, 2015, 01:49:44 pm
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javelin is a missle?
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Algarn on March 05, 2015, 07:11:40 pm
Quote from: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 04:30:40 pm
javelin is a missle?

I heard that if you got a javelin/stone and you yell Allahu akbar, your javelin becomes an RPG. That's a tactical choice.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 07:18:32 pm
Quote from: WarLord on March 05, 2015, 02:03:45 pm
Bold part is definitely wrong, everything else is right.  :mrgreen:

well i dont have enough english for it but i will try to explain.

for example you trained chest like a fukin man. your chest is warmed up. so when you start doing cardio since your chest is warmed up it will directly burns fat. otherwise your muscle needs to warm up before burning fat. i learnt this shit from my trainers but idk maybe they were wrong i just tell what i know
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: jtobiasm on March 05, 2015, 07:24:12 pm
Quote from: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 07:18:32 pm
well i dont have enough english for it but i will try to explain.

for example you trained chest like a fukin man. your chest is warmed up. so when you start doing cardio since your chest is warmed up it will directly burns fat. otherwise your muscle needs to warm up before burning fat. i learnt this shit from my trainers but idk maybe they were wrong i just tell what i know
You do weights first which will burn the carbs, then cardio burns the fat, makes losing weight easy as fuck.
It's why low carbs diets are effective as fuarkk
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Paul on March 05, 2015, 08:06:00 pm
Quote from: jtobiasm on March 05, 2015, 07:24:12 pm
You do weights first which will burn the carbs, then cardio burns the fat, makes losing weight easy as fuck.
It's why low carbs diets are effective as fuarkk

wut? low carp diets are supposed to work because eating cabonates trigger insulin release and insulin has the side effect off decreasing the fat burn rate. so a low carp diet should result in long insulin-free phases that lead to relatively high fat burn rates.

but for gaining muscle mass low carp is actually not  that great because insulin is one of the most anabol(muscle building) hormones. thats why eating carps(who trigger insulin release) around training is actually good for bulking up. in fact pro body builders even inject fast insulin (in combination with HGHs that counter the fat gain among other things).
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Armpit_Sweat on March 05, 2015, 08:17:13 pm
You guys talk the talk, but don't show what you got - post some pictures! One who is most fit has most to say imo.
All this theory is very nice, but boring. Watch some Dom Mazzetti on youtube, he is my wife's favorite. He will teach you what to eat, how to not fail in gym, and how to be a cool guy - all while being funny.

But yeah, post some nudes or gtfo :)
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: jtobiasm on March 05, 2015, 09:31:15 pm
Quote from: Paul on March 05, 2015, 08:06:00 pm
wut? low carp diets are supposed to work because eating cabonates trigger insulin release and insulin has the side effect off decreasing the fat burn rate. so a low carp diet should result in long insulin-free phases that lead to relatively high fat burn rates.

but for gaining muscle mass low carp is actually not  that great because insulin is one of the most anabol(muscle building) hormones. thats why eating carps(who trigger insulin release) around training is actually good for bulking up. in fact pro body builders even inject fast insulin (in combination with HGHs that counter the fat gain among other things).
who said owt abart bulkin on a low carb diet
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 09:52:32 pm
heyheyhey insulin is not anabolic i have diabetes bruh. insulin makes the sugar in your blood enter the cells and if you dont use that sugar in cells it will turn into fat thats why high carb makes u fat insulin gives you energy but if you dont use it you will be fat and of course if you eat someting it will turn into energy insulin is not a pre-workout shit
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Paul on March 05, 2015, 10:11:33 pm
insulin is extremely anabolic, especially in conjuction with HGH.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 11:16:44 pm
Years later we're still doing 'do you even lift' threads like they were new

There are several hundred predating this one if I've read right
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: darmaster on March 05, 2015, 11:23:21 pm
sorry i just wanted to ask do penises transplants exist? i'm not gonna google that, not even in incognito
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Leshma on March 05, 2015, 11:25:58 pm
They can make you a penis from skin taken from your butt, yes. But it is done for transexuals (experience talking) and penis made that way isn't functional because they have no balls to produce semen. As matter of penis augmentation, dunno, maybe they can use it that way. But if it was known surgery, bet it would be all over the place like fake tits, ass and other female body parts.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 05, 2015, 11:28:25 pm
(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Xant on March 06, 2015, 07:49:53 am
Doctors hate him - see how he made his penis grow five inches with a home remedy.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: lombardsoup on March 06, 2015, 08:33:08 am
Is there a remedy to increase the speed of game development?
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: DonNicko on March 06, 2015, 08:41:56 am
Quote from: JennaHaze on March 05, 2015, 07:18:32 pm
for example you trained chest like a fukin man. your chest is warmed up. so when you start doing cardio since your chest is warmed up it will directly burns fat. otherwise your muscle needs to warm up before burning fat. i learnt this shit from my trainers but idk maybe they were wrong i just tell what i know
Well, I will try to say, that if you will try to make cardio after lifting high weights, then you will burn muscles more then fat, you have to do cardio before lifting or separate day. Also you have to controll your heart pulse, because fat will burn if only cells will get enough oxygen. How to find and calculate optimal range of pulse you can find on internet. If to do cardio after, there can be a refatigue and it is unhealthy.
Title: Re: You wanna get ripped? You wanna get stronger? Burn fat etc.? Get in mupfuggah!
Post by: Dupre on March 06, 2015, 08:44:15 am
Quote from: DonNicko on March 06, 2015, 08:41:56 am
Well, I will try to say, that if you will try to make cardio after lifting high weights, then you will burn muscles more then fat, you have to do cardio before lifting or separate day. Also you have to controll your heart pulse, because fat will burn if only cells will get enough oxygen. How to find and calculate optimal range of pulse you can find on internet. If to do cardio after, there can be a refatigue and it is unhealthy.

Smart man :mrgreen: