cRPG
Strategus => Diplomacy => Topic started by: Gristle on November 09, 2011, 08:50:23 am
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Right, it's about time we of actual importance and standing had a place away from the common riffraff. A place for we elite few who wear our pink fonted badges proudly. It's about time we, the 1%, had a place to be heard!
So, my good fellows, how goes the tax collecting? Rabble not complaining too much I hope?
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I amnot one of the lords and ladies :(. All you uppity nobles will get your comeuppance one of these days. Us peasants are considering making a common collective or maybe the Peasant Liberation Front of Calradia (don't listen to those filthy Calradian's People's Liberation Front or the Calradian Liberation Front, we are the only true rebels) and we will take you down.
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I amnot one of the lords and ladies :(. All you uppity nobles will get your comeuppance one of these days. Us peasants are considering making a common collective or maybe the Peasant Liberation Front of Calradia (don't listen to those filthy Calradian's People's Liberation Front or the Calradian Liberation Front, we are the only true rebels) and we will take you down.
All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Calradian lords ever done for us?
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Good sirs, it dost appear that cavalry has become over powered beyond any and all hope of unfuckery. A nerf is not enough.
We must banneth all of the horsemen.
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Good sirs, it dost appear that cavalry has become over powered beyond any and all hope of unfuckery. A nerf is not enough.
We must banneth all of the horsemen.
Nonsense, horsemen are of noble blood. In fact, horsemen should receive a buff to reflect their God-given superiority over their unhorsed brethren.
I own vast tracts of land, to think I would ever walk, anywhere, even in battle, is preposterous.
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The sWalker does not yet know where tavern owners are slotted in this current system...*just know if anyone says the sWalker is a peasant they will be quickly filled with arrows*. Please tell the sWalker where he stands.
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The sWalker does not yet know where tavern owners are slotted in this current system...*just know if anyone says the sWalker is a peasant they will be quickly filled with arrows*. Please tell the sWalker where he stands.
We are no peasant or noble but legends sWalker. Soon these weaklings will feels the wraith of our power when our arrows block out the sun.
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Nonsense, horsemen are of noble blood. In fact, horsemen should receive a buff to reflect their God-given superiority over their unhorsed brethren.
I own vast tracts of land, to think I would ever walk, anywhere, even in battle, is preposterous.
Agreed.
But I have a small problem. Some of my peasants asked if THEY could ride a horse! HAH! Have you heard such a preposterous suggestion! Nay, I told him, horses are for the Lords only! I say we should ALL get our own personal horses for when we move around, separating us from the common rabble.
The sWalker does not yet know where tavern owners are slotted in this current system...*just know if anyone says the sWalker is a peasant they will be quickly filled with arrows*. Please tell the sWalker where he stands.
The sWalker is not of a Lords blood, but he is far beyond a common peasant. You have the love of the nobility, even though you are (yet) not one of us. Walk in glory, young one, and show the world just how pure a common man can be!
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Yarrr all ye fancy noble lads and ladies are like to have great hordes of loot fer the talking, ill be bringing me crew on by to relieve ye of some of that heavy burdensome gold ye keep in yer treasury! I may also be so inclined as to burn yer tavern down as I find the drink selection needlessly complex and yet lacking of the one true essential: Grog.
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Yarrr all ye fancy noble lads and ladies are like to have great hordes of loot fer the talking, ill be bringing me crew on by to relieve ye of some of that heavy burdensome gold ye keep in yer treasury! I may also be so inclined as to burn yer tavern down as I find the drink selection needlessly complex and yet lacking of the one true essential: Grog.
Don't be listening to him - he is with the Calradian People's Front
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A scroll is pinned on the wall of a local tavern and it reads:
visitors can't see pics , please register or login
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I've heard word of someone challenging me at the local tavern? I, as one of Noble blood, do not go near such wretched places. Probably some fool looking for a drinking match. Pah! I have no time for such squabbles. I have a town to run, and fine, expensive wine to indulge in.
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Noble blood!? I dareth say te ye Sir that thine noble blood be tainted with all things not in favor with the Lord. Not only are ye impure in heart, but I possess the most holy sword - a katana of such sharpness that it can goeth through a tank! Whatever a tank may be. But tis a word that doth sounds most unstoppable. Hide and Cry behind thy stoned castle! I am the true Heir to Kwynn and I shalleth taketh it!
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There are not much who show their noble title like i do ( for all german non speakers - Graf = count ).
Bless the blue bloods!
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Harr, I hear thar be nobles around whats having problems with some of the local riff raff... Fer a moderate fee i might be able to... heh... persuade said local riff raff to permanently cease their affronts... heh... if ye catch me drift.
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Noble blood!? I dareth say te ye Sir that thine noble blood be tainted with all things not in favor with the Lord. Not only are ye impure in heart, but I possess the most holy sword - a katana of such sharpness that it can goeth through a tank! Whatever a tank may be. But tis a word that doth sounds most unstoppable. Hide and Cry behind thy stoned castle! I am the true Heir to Kwynn and I shalleth taketh it!
Oh please. Your claim of right to rule is as worthless as that butter knife you call a sword. Honestly, only a barbarian would believe that ownership of God given land could be decided on a fight to the death. You, peasant, are living in a dream world. Return to your crops.
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It seems that lazy riff raff and drunks are drawn to Tadsamesh. I've instructed the local guard to flog any villagers caught harboring non productive fugitives and immigrants within Tadsamesh's walls.
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Oh please. Your claim of right to rule is as worthless as that butter knife you call a sword. Honestly, only a barbarian would believe that ownership of God given land could be decided on a fight to the death. You, peasant, are living in a dream world. Return to your crops.
I knew we shouldn't have given Gristle a fief, look what he's becoming.
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I do say, some lad came into town today talking of Arabs flying on carpets and shooting flames from staffs at the steppe people in the south... He also said that now that a red-haired-buxom lass in the south rallying the masses there is talk of a revolt due to the god's fickle nature.. I had him horse whipped for speaking such foolishness.. We all know that no one would take a red-head seriously. How go things in the rest of the realm, my lords?
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Ginger revolt!!! We have no soulds, you cannot stop us!!! Lords and peasants alike will be consumed by our fires!!! Anarchy shall reign!!! Death to all wizards!!!!
P.S. Pink, auburn, copper all are welcome.
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The peasants of my village at first worked so slowly, I have some good motivational techniques if the other Lords need them they need only ask.
You will need several items though.
A lute player, several chairs, wooden sticks and pink fluffy handcuffs.
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The peasants of my village at first worked so slowly, I have some good motivational techniques if the other Lords need them they need only ask.
You will need several items though.
A lute player, several chairs, wooden sticks and pink fluffy handcuffs.
I'm interested. Send me a PM.
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i am no lord but a Humble Diplomat yet I hold the wealth of a lord yet know more about polotics lol
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i am no lord but a Humble Diplomat yet I hold the wealth of a lord yet know more about polotics lol
You uncultured simpleton! I shall have the owner of this establishment forcibly remove you from the premise for bringing your bourgeois filth into this establishment of the Nobility. Learn your place you vermin!
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Non can deny my claim of becoming a lord it is just a matter of time untill I am a lord, I as a Diplomat am Equal to a lord and at times above in stature
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Quiet Knave!
You landless peasant! Remove yourself from the sight of your betters!
I shall go and have a chat with the owners. We need some ruffians at the door to keep the riff raff out.
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We need some ruffians at the door to keep the riff raff out.
Preposterous! I would sooner see myself in the gallows before allowing such filth to soil my doorstep.
I for one use nothing but my pure-breed attack dogs for guard duty. Marvelous creatures; they know the true implication of "mercy" when it comes to the rabble.
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Harr, I hear thar be nobles around whats having problems with some of the local riff raff... Fer a moderate fee i might be able to... heh... persuade said local riff raff to permanently cease their affronts... heh... if ye catch me drift.
Bro, you're creepy. Back outta the Lord's Hall immediately, its for cool cats only. 8-)
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Lord Hobb of Odasan gloats that he has the most efficient underpaid workers in all of Calradia. His workers have achieved this title not because of their own willingness, but as a result of their sheer fear of Hobb's anger. How does Hobb instill fear and obedience in his servants? Simple, Hobb has hacked all of his subject's steam accounts, and they only get access to them after they transfer their goods to him on "collection" day. If they don't reach their quota, well then they dont get to play skyrim that week.
Just food for thought my lords,
Bro, you're creepy. Back outta the Lord's Hall immediately, its for cool cats only. 8-)
and Voso, GTFO
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In order to get ahold of my owners you must speak with me first as the Diplomat and messanger In time I shall be your Equal or Superior
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A street rat superior to a lord? Put some bells on and you'll make a fine jester!
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Dear fellow lords, I wish to share with you a missive from the Chaos B.U.T.T. (Bureau of Universal Transportation and Torture) for your benefit:
"Hear thee, hear thee:
In an effort to preserve and increase the lifespan of horses as a valuable resource, they are henceforth to be carried by peasants.
For lighter horses such as Rouncies and Coursers, one peasant will suffice. It will be granted to share the carrying duty for heavier horses such as War Horses and Plated Chargers between two peasants, as long as they are presently not required for other duties, such as tending to the fields or being used for target practice.
Should a knight require a horse for transportation, henceforth the knight will mount the horse, which will then be carried by a peasant. In the event of a valiant charge into battle, the horse carrying peasant is to protect the horse by all means and charge into any pointy obstacles threatening the horses life with his own body.
If there are two peasants assigned to carry a heavier horse into a battlefield charge, they may split the task to increase effectiveness of the charge. In this case one peasant may charge ahead into any pointy obstacles and block them with his body, while the second, horse and rider carrying peasant, follows in a second charge.
Peasants that are not able to carry a horse and its rider in sufficient speed to achieve a lance couch are to be whipped until they see the error of their ways and try harder next time.
This missive shall be law as declared by the B.U.T.T. and any violation is punishable by an immediate valiant charge into the next pointy obstacle."
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Dear fellow lords, I wish to share with you a missive from the Chaos B.U.T.T. (Bureau of Universal Transportation and Torture) for your benefit:
"Hear thee, hear thee:
In an effort to preserve and increase the lifespan of horses as a valuable resource, they are henceforth to be carried by peasants.
For lighter horses such as Rouncies and Coursers, one peasant will suffice. It will be granted to share the carrying duty for heavier horses such as War Horses and Plated Chargers between two peasants, as long as they are presently not required for other duties, such as tending to the fields or being used for target practice.
Should a knight require a horse for transportation, henceforth the knight will mount the horse, which will then be carried by a peasant. In the event of a valiant charge into battle, the horse carrying peasant is to protect the horse by all means and charge into any pointy obstacles threatening the horses life with his own body.
If there are two peasants assigned to carry a heavier horse into a battlefield charge, they may split the task to increase effectiveness of the charge. In this case one peasant may charge ahead into any pointy obstacles and block them with his body, while the second, horse and rider carrying peasant, follows in a second charge.
Peasants that are not able to carry a horse and its rider in sufficient speed to achieve a lance couch are to be whipped until they see the error of their ways and try harder next time.
This missive shall be law as declared by the B.U.T.T. and any violation is punishable by an immediate valiant charge into the next pointy obstacle."
I currently need 6 peasants - 5 to carry my horse and 1 to carry my dog. Please deliver by peasant-carriage.
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i got a goat that when he crutches on his plate can carry a full team of peasants on siege....