Boris Johnson is fucking epic for all the wrong reasons. He tackles kids with full force in sports. He called all ISIS "literally wankers" after finding out about the immense amount of porn they watch. He is a completely bizarre choice for Foreign Minister and I am ready for the lols.
Boris Quotes
"My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it."
"My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg."
"Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3."
"I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed so it didn't go up my nose. In fact, it may have been icing sugar."
On Tony Blair "It is just flipping unbelievable. He is a mixture of Harry Houdini and a greased piglet. He is barely human in his elusiveness. Nailing Blair is like trying to pin jelly to a wall."
Mr Johnson, clearly unhappy at being ejected from the meeting early, labelled the assembly as “great supine protoplasmic invertebrate jellies”.