HEAR YE AGAIN!
Due to his masterful work and command of the armies of Halitrous, I, Bryggan, King of Halitrous, select JayJrod the Clutch, Lord of Tilbault Castle, Duke of Mehraklios, and All Round Good Guy, to be Marshal of the Kingdom. I have counted all the votes, and he has won by a narrow margin. Below are the results of the voting:Votes for JayJrod: Votes for my Potted Plant
Mr_Blue A toad I almost stepped on
Lord Thalion of Mithrim A rock that was yelling at me
BenJem An invisible bat
NSIV That voice in my head
Johnumiss That other voice in my head
TheGreatDane The third voice in my head
Sir Lord Gentleman Snuffy My enchanted Sword
MooCowButtFace A mosquito I slapped
Albus 7 time all star Footballer Doug Brown of the CFL
Zenox My childhood pet dog that appeared to me in a dream
Tim The Enchanter An apparition of Ghengis Khan
Sigi Another apparition of Ghengis Khan
iK KbW The skull of the first enemy I killed
r_Stryker A bird that flew by my window
Elderly Woman My left foot (my right foot abstained)
Bariz That bramble bush over there
Scab The Tickle Me Elmo I got 11 years ago
Battlereeve Finian Tercel My Imaginary Friend
Kitsu My Imaginary Friend's Imaginary Friend
Ornolf the ShieldBreaker Another Imaginary Friend I just made up now
Xbow Pete The Ghost of Christmas Past
FruxMaster VI My Shadow
Ermax The big forehead guy from 'The Office'
Hamhands
And I must praise all the valiant warriors of the Halitrous kingdom, who have seized that which is rightfully ours, and who have defended its borders vigorously.
Truly, when I look upon the map and see the other great factions of Strat; the Ferocious Hounds, the Mighty Make Calradia Great Againians, The Deadly Despotate, the Relentless Calradian Confederacy, and, what the heck, even the Fecal Free Peasants of Fisdnar... well, there will be a lot of competition to be considered the greatest, yet I believe we of Halitrous shall show our steel!
I also believe that spiders are the true rulers of the universe, and we should bow before them. I also think..."Ok Bryggan, that's quite enough," Blue said, grabbing Bryggan by the arm, "Time to go back to the throne room."
"What? um ok", Bryggan answered. "But did you execute the curtains like I ordered you to? I heard them plotting against me."
"Yes, yes, now off you go." And Blue watched Bryggan leave in some awkward crab-walk that he believed looked regal.
JayJrod sidled up to Blue. "And, um, you put the locks on the outside of the door I hope."
"Certainly", Blue said, "I don't want that mad man wandering around at night while I am sleeping."
"True, "JayJrod agreed, "How long has it been since you found him wandering around mad in the desert?"
"About two months now."
"Damn. Not much improvement there."
"I'd say there was a lot of improvement," Blue responded, "He's much more pliable now.
