To his majesty, King Tristan of Erzoth,
of the Family Stark,
Lords of the Southern Realms:
I believe the Starks are a royal line from the north, and should our two houses join, it may give me a little more validity as High King of the North. For some reason i seem to be losing support, and I can only blame that not everyone quite trusts the documents signed by that cleric moments before his unfortunate death that proves my royalty (Dirk thinks its because we keep attacking our friends and allies).
While I may be old, I assure you I am still virile, and will be able to provide an heir that can rule one of the largest kingdoms in Strat history (in area, not population thanks to they Ayufkay plague). In fact, an heir might already be on its way (Not so Innocent Virgin is not quite as innocent as she seems)... hmm, better not add that last bit.
I will admit I have been sending her secret messages with poetry in it, mostly stuff I learned from travelling minstrels, but even some of my own composition, such as this:
"There once was a lady from Carafe
who's legs were as long as a giraffe's
But ten times as nice
but they came with a price
the rule of my kingdom (or at least half)"
While sending messages may not be proper without talking to her family first, I just did it to see if her ardour matched mine, for I would in no way wish to force such a fair maiden into a marriage in which she was not a willing partner. That and to arrange those secret trysts, ha ha! Oh damn! Don't write that down either, you idiot!.
So please consider myself, Bryggan, High King of the North, Commander of the 13 Knights, Lord of Curaw and Defender of a Faith as a worthy suitor for the lovely Not_So_Innocent_Virgin. Should a more suitable suitor present himself, I will gracefully withdraw my offer. And then invade and lay waste to said suitor! She can't be marrying a dead man, will she? STOP WRITING EVERYTHING I SAY DOWN!!!
Ok, now throw in some compliments to House Stark and sign it Bryggan blah blah blah. And I want you to make a new copy. The worst thing that could happen is that you send this copy with all that crossed out stuff on it.