Well at least it doesn't suck.
I wish I didn´t know a friend who works at the hospital telling me about the amount of incidents and their details when people have sex with vacuum cleaners but I do
if you ever consider to fuck a hoover, please, please make at least an at least 1cm wide safety hole into the tube, otherwise the built-up vacuum will cause irreparable damage to your former penis and the place around it, sometimes even killing the person due to the blood loss afterwards or damage on internal organs
on the other hand, all those sextoy-emergency calls he told me were hilarious. Never ever use a dildo as a buttplug, it can get lost in there and it will
not come out without professional hospital tools, sometimes even created(!) for this exact kind of incident
