LLJK has reached across the aisle to ask for a desert alliance with Hero_Party, with the expressed intent of "making the whole desert green" and destroying Remnants, Occitan, Chevalieres, Astralis, Kingdom of Veluca, Swords with Friends, and ultimately BIRD CLAN.
Out of awe and respect of LLJK's 4 active members and 1000 total troops after a month of peaceful trade over the Strategus map, along with Phantom Zero's endlessly charismatic and successful diplomacy, organization, and clan leadership, we have no choice but to agree to the most generous terms possible.
For a story, I remember LLJK's fair terms they gave to Muki. Muki had a small, independent faction in the middle of the Strat map, enjoying himself. Phantom decided for no reason except that Muki was in LLJK 8 months ago that he owned the fief, so he traded it away to Remnants without Muki's knowledge or intent. When Muki asked why Remnants attacked him, Remnants realized they were misled and offered Muki one of their desert fiefs instead. Phantom, ever wise, told Muki sure, he could get the fief next to LLJK. But Muki would have to "go green" or join LLJK, would have no control over his S/D or PP, and would obey every order of Phantom's.
Anything else would be "worse than Hospitallers," as he has elegantly sworn to Remnants, TKoV, and who knows who else in the past whenever they offered a trade deal or war assistance in any way, ultimately alienating every historic friend of LLJK's from every past Strategus with fully justified arrogance and lack of humility.
Truly how one faction should treat another, with the utmost respect and dignity. So our terms for helping LLJK openly invade Chevalieres, Astralis, Kingdom of Veluca, Remnants, Occitan, and BIRD CLAN are as follows:
• LLJK must rename itself to Hero Party Jr.
• LLJK will no longer have control over its own PP or S/D
• LLJK must turn Shariz into a +3 Deli Robe factory, and deliver me 10,000 Reinforced Deli Robes a week for the rest of Strategus
• LLJK must write and perform a musical about "LORD PROTECTOR SMOOTHRICH, THE GREATEST LEADER LLJK HAS EVER KNOWN" with various other songs like "The 15 Bans of Goate" "How Zealot Killed LLJK" and "Funny Shit Neumonic Said" all money raised by the musical will go to me
• Can someone buy me archives and search on the SA forums please, I've already spent 30 bucks from bans and don't want to spend any more money for a shit internet forum
• Someone post that J4G recording of Kreczor talking about showing a gay guy his dick
I consider these terms of alliance to be fair and balanced, and will only conduct further negotiations in public view within this thread, for the sake of the people and as a sign of full disclosure and honesty.
Thank you and god bless the United States of America..
