1) Well, you can also get a bad perfomance if you have a bad k/d on the winning team. So for you it actually doesn't matter. But of course it is normal that the losing team dies more often. It is no rule though.
2) see above
3) there are some TeamSpeak's that are used.
For example:
For HRE/Fallen/Merc battles, you can visit the HRE/Fallen or Merc TS.
For Nordmen battles, it is the Nordmen TS.
For UIF (Grey Order, DRZ, Union, Empire), it is the Grey TS.
Those are clan's TeamSpeak servers which are also used for battles (you find TS information inthe clans' threads). For most and especially important battles, you should visit TS. Usually it is saying so in a description.
There is also the Nditions TeamSpeak for many other clans, as mentioned above.
I don't know about NA though (if needed). Best is to ask the guys who are launching and leading the battles.
Btw even if you were accepted for 100 gold, it doesn't mean you get that gold. It also doesn't matter for yourself at all, if you don't play Strategus and only participate in Strategus Battles.