I can write a bullshit essay designed for the reading comprehension, emotional maturity and steadiness level of an adolescent, but I shouldn’t need to. We’re all adults here or at least should be.
Everyone reading this should absolutely be able to handle free, honest, and open expression without trying to force someone to wear a façade, censor their ideas out of crude intimidation tactics, or be pigeonholed into saying whatever the other person desires just so they can find a temporary conclusion to the matter at hand while satiating the ego of the interviewer and not their actual viewpoint.
The idea that I’m getting (from what you’ve mentioned) is that you want me to flat-out patronize you in possibly the most condescending demeanor possible by writing arguably the greatest few paragraphs of bullshit you will ever read in your lives; full well knowing exactly what I’m doing.
Either that or you’re so totally and absolutely naïve that you think that I’m somehow deeply emotionally scarred by the sudden realization that I’ve talked A LOT of mindless, meaningless trash and that it’ll never happen again because the abundance of empathy that has poured into my soul has cleared my mind and set me on the path of absolute righteousness.
So let’s start the discussion shall we?
About these accusations that I’m sexist, homophobic, preaching hate, violence against certain demographics, etc… that I’ve seen administrators try to insinuate…
I know some admins are desperate to reinforce their subjective case with as many weak and outlandish arguments as they can pile on top to bolster it, but this is pretty desperate. If you can show me one case of me openly bashing and intentionally doing my best to inflict as much emotional distress/harm as possible to someone who has admitted to me that they are in fact legitimately gay, you’d have a case. But, you’re never going to find that case because it doesn’t exist. I frankly do not care what your sexual preference is as long as you’re not a pedophile. If I was indeed a homophobe like what is trying to be stated, I probably wouldn’t actively listen to a lot of the music I’ve already posted in my guild thread. Bands like Depeche mode, Erasure, Queen, Soft cell etc…
I’ve also seen “spamming” being thrown atop of shoddy case I’ve already described.
As the only real crpg leader, on the entire planet, who has any remote experience actually organizing pubs to win against other pubs and organized banner stacking clans, I will say “GET THROUGH THE FUCKING GATE NOW” no more than what is necessary to get them through that gate and onto the flag.
I’m the only person I’ve ever seen, in my 2.5+ years of playing crpg, who consistently organizes and leads pubs.
Why is that the case? Because it’s a horrible, thankless job and it never gets any easier. Pubs are anything but disciplined. Often times they are full of ultra sarcastic and stubborn teenagers who would just as soon rather lose than listen to the direction of someone else. I have an extremely vast amount of knowledge on what tactics to use, when to use them, what maps to use them on, etc… I’ve proven this time and time again over the course of literally thousands and thousands of rounds. This isn’t up for dispute.
However, I also know what methods of rallying the troops works compared to what doesn’t. I’ve tried basically everything and have had more than enough time to figure out what unorganized masses respond to. Using a vast array of colorful foul language, like it or not, resonates with people a hell of a lot more effectively than saying “please, guys.” I know for certain because I’ve tried it both ways.
It would please me greatly and I would much prefer it if “please” actually remotely worked, but it doesn’t. A lot of people forget the fact that I’m also the most ardent supporter of my team, in the entire history of the mod, when they perform well and do their job. I slap them on the butt and give them a big wet and sloppy kiss as thanks for doing their part; even when we lose.
The fact that people forget this or choose not to acknowledge it proves the entirety of my point. Kicking someone in the ass and yelling at them works extremely well as a motivator, towards the undisciplined, compared to begging on your knees pleading to their best intentions.
The people in clans wouldn’t know this because they are in organized, highly-structured groups full of people that are often using third party voice communication to relay information between each other privately. This sheltered existence spoils them like a mother who coddles her children by homeschooling them until adulthood. They sit in their club house, made of pillows, chewing on grandma’s cookies while I’m out there in the wasteland, getting my ass burned off squeezing blood from a thousand stones at once.
What I do is the job nobody else wants to do; that nobody else does. I channel and harness chaos every 3-5 minutes into a lethal fighting unit that can beat even the greatest exploitation of banner stackers around. Hell, the clan named Chaos shouldn’t even use that name. They should call themselves “Law and Order” and have a special fuckin cameo during the first half hour by the rapper ICE T playing a grizzled, street-wise detective.
Do I ask for thanks in return? No. The bonus I get and the satisfaction of knowing what I’ve done is reward enough. All I want is for mods to stay off my ass because of my use of unconventional but necessary methods to accomplish great things. Believe me absolutely when I say the end justifies these means.
Try doing it yourself if you aren’t convinced, because I’d really love to see that. After half an hour you’d be sitting in your bathtub listening to joy division while opening up a vein. Try to keep in mind I’ve been doing this successfully for well over 2 years.
People try to act like I’m a stain or plague on the community when in the reality I’m their greatest asset. Without me, they’d be completely helpless against even the lowest tier clan in the valley; perpetually stuck at x1 until the organized predators got bored of having x5, with no challenge, and decided to leave.
Not only do I lead public groups to victory, but I also eat “trolls” and other miscreants with such efficiency and generality that the complete worldwide mod staff can’t even compete with the skulls I bring home to my pleasure dome.
To put this into context:
I’m like a great white megalodon shark, off the coast of Australia, that devours other smaller sharks who are far more numerous and prone to attacking surfers and humans in the area. Essentially, I’m a great big magnificent son of a bitch apex-predator, with great big shiny teeth, that has an appetite for meat but who also serves a purpose far greater than itself. Such is nature.
If there was ever a champion to the people of crpg, it’d be me without any contest for these reasons primarily.
Despite the attempted vilification by others, I have the greatest contingency of fans and admirers out of every crpg player put together. Likewise, there are more alternate characters dedicated to or bearing the name “Spook” than every other player combined.
Now, why do you think that despite being so completely abrasive in parts of my behavior that I can still achieve such a feat?
It’s because Americans and people everywhere love an anti-hero. They love people who play to win at all cost despite however unpopular it makes them. They love people who are true to themselves and don’t take unfair bullshit off anybody even when bribed to do otherwise. They want someone with character and integrity even if they are rough around the edges. They want someone who ultimately knows right from wrong yet still has the ability to see the big picture and focus on things that truly matter; not the petty, trivial, and small issues that degrade and distract from what’s most important.
They want a fighter, a winner, a person who can joke around, spit in the eye of the beast, and pull out a victory despite everything laid against them.
As for my record the admins enjoy hanging over my head?
About half of my ban record is bullshit that stretches an entire 2.5 years of playing. That’s a pretty long time considering the few legitimate bans that I’ve actually earned.
For example, I got banned once not too long ago for literally calling someone Canadian. Not even joking. The person who put the ban forward, Bob something or other, told me (when he next saw me) that he only put the ban request forward to see if he could get away with it and see if it would pass. It was so completely laughable to the person putting it forward, that even he wasn’t sure if it would go through because the premise was such a complete and utter joke it seemed that unrealistic. If you don’t believe me, go ahead and check the logs for the day or two after that ban passed and search the text history of the guy who put it forward. I dare you.
This is exactly the type of bullshit that happens when you leave a massively expansive grey area open for people to abuse as they see fit, players and administrators included. Instead of fixing the vast grey area and making it more structured so there isn’t so much abuse, administrators simply refuse to do anything about it because apparently having rules that possess clearly defined stipulations somehow makes your job harder. Does that make sense? No, it doesn’t.
So why does the grey area rulebook still exist despite it’s proven track record and theoretical tendency to only enable abuse? One can only believe because of the ideas I put forward.
Remember something very important: I follow all clearly written black and white rules to the letter. People know this. I know this.Talking trash is a part of every competitive game on the planet. Even certain admins do it from time to time and some are even well known for it. Nobody is innocent from using extremely shallow, unspecific, trivialized insults such as ”retarded” or “stupid” or “idiot” or “bundle of sticks” or whatever; whether in their personal lives or a video game. These are all offensive terms that could violate the grey area rules that are currently in place. It really just depends to the people in charge whether they personally want such words or expressions to officially violate a set of rules that are entirely subjective by their own definition.
So here’s what really needs to happen with policy:
Admins need to decide what language is off limits and not what language is off limits when they feel like it. There's a very good reason that as society develops, laws tend to become increasingly specific and well-defined. This is done intentionally.
The reason for this is to eliminate the "humor error" factor and keep handlers from bending the law or interpreting it, as they see fit, to suit their own preferences or agendas.
The extremely broad and entirely subjective grey area rulebook you're using to try to make an example of me, is nothing more than an insurance policy meant to give deciders the leeway and leverage they desire to get away with what they want without having to abide by the narrowness or structure of a black and white system that is well-defined.
Furthermore, there’s a mute button clearly built within extremely easy access of the players interface to use. All it takes is two clicks of a mouse and a scroll through an alphabetical listing and boom, problem solved.
So when I see someone blatantly trying to play the helpless victim card by saying something like “I was gonna play CRPG, but I saw Spook playing and decided to do my homework and clean my room instead,” I think we can all conclude (by using basic rationale) that this is a crock of shit; not to mention that person’s parents should be thanking me if there’s any actual truth to it.
Everybody has a mute function. It’s in the game for a reason. If you don’t want to use it, it’s nobody else’s fault; not to mention ,if somebody asks me to specifically not talk to them, I grant them that request as long as they don’t try initiating conversation with me later on. That’s pretty damn fair if you ask me, but you can’t please everyone; especially when they don’t want to be pleased.
I also saw somebody make the point that I could get arrested in Canada for saying some of the things that were in my chat log in public. Yeah, well you could also jailed, stoned, or beheaded for insulting Muhammad in many Islamic countries. This is a pretty tame example as well.
So in light of this, it’s time for me to officially hop up on my soap box about this topic of speech and expression.
Canada doesn’t have real freedom of speech despite what many of their citizens may believe. They never fought for their independence and earned it. Canada is still part of the British Commonwealth; now politically known as the “Commonwealth of Nations.”
As a full-blooded and extremely proud American, with relatives and ancestors who died spilling blood and having their blood spilled during wartime to protect the freedom and sovereignty of this country, I can tell you the most important thing American citizens have is our freedom of speech. It’s arguably the biggest reason we’re easily the greatest country on the planet. However, over the years I’ve seen a new beast rear its ugly head operating under the guise of social justice and threatening the fabric of this most precious right. The beast itself is called political correctness. Based off a noble principle, it serves as an indirect and invisible blanket of intimidation meant to stifle and suppress any though that is not aligned within what is deemed socially acceptable by mainstream society. It’s the most insidious form of widespread censorship and social engineering in post-modern society, and its impact is sadly felt on a daily basis.
It’s a big part of the reason why music and comedy has spiraled into the abyss over the past 15 years. It’s part of the reason why Hollywood has gone bankrupt in terms of creativity and we see so many cinematic remakes instead of new thought-provoking films that push the envelope of their genres and create entirely new ones. In the past 25 years, we’ve gone from Al Bundy and Married with Children to Glee and Big Bang Theory. We’ve gone from Freddie Mercury to Lady Gaga, from Alice in Chains and Nirvana to Nickelback and 30 Seconds to Mars, from unironic flannel and ripped jean-shorts to fedoras and scarves. It’s the same reason DC comics turned the original Green -Lantern gay and created an Islamic Green-Lantern within a 6 month time frame. It’s the same reason the most iconic superhero of all time, Superman (the same character who is more American than apple-pie and baseball combined), was made to renounce his U.S. citizenship. In 50 years at this pace, we’ll probably see some kind of open man-boy love relationship between Batman and Robin once society goes off the deep end and deems pedophilia to be acceptable behavior occurring in nature. I could easily give a dozen more non superhero-themed examples, but it’s starting to piss me off just thinking about it.
This is part of what George Orwell warned us about in his book “1984.” Only instead of a big-brother, state-controlled group indoctrinating the populace (and thereby society) to limit political motivation, it’s a certain, faultily progressive-minded, segment of society itself that produces an indirect social-conditioning by using the same method of intimidation and fear to limit freedom of expression, thought, and voice. The desired result is to eliminate anything that might be considered offensive or impolite to anyone. The heart may be in the right place, but the brain is far removed. As the saying goes, some of the worst things imaginable start with the best of intentions.
Ultimately, we are playing a video game that revolves around killing other people with slashing/stabbing/piercing/blunt weapons, up close and personal, for gold and increased power. If you can handle that, there’s no reason you shouldn’t be able to handle text on a screen in any form.
It deeply troubles me to see Westerners, Americans especially, to be pissing on such freedoms that hundreds of people are dying for a shred of, everyday, in the middle-east; that millions of our own forefathers have died protecting and ensuring. I don’t know why that is. Whether it’s just the fact that this generation is spoiled and sheltered, whether they don’t know their history, or whether they just don’t give a shit. I can’t answer that question because I can’t truly empathize with that way of thinking. Frankly, I don’t want to.
It’s more important that human beings have the ability to fight with words and expressions rather than guns and bombs. The people who wrote the constitution of the great U.S. of A. knew that all too well.
This reminds me entirely of a discussion I had a few years ago in my Master’s level Management course. We were on the discussion of acceptable speech behavior and the professor used the example of a basketball team attempting to rally themselves by one of the players saying “Alright, let’s go rape these guys!” We discussed the possibility of a person hearing that who had actually been raped or molested and what that meant or how it should have been dealt with, etc..
To my complete dismay and sadness, the only responses given by other students was that he shouldn’t have said that; that nobody should ever say anything like that out of consideration for who it might possibly offend. There were a couple more examples like this but you get the hint. So I formed my thoughts and then thoroughly silenced these people not with subtle intimidation but with common sense and basic rationale. Here’s the gist of the argument I put forward to them:
There are these things I call “hot-words.” Rape is an example of which. A hot-word is basically any word that adds spice, excitement, or is intended to stir an emotional response within a person. These words can be used with good or bad intentions. Naturally, these words have the very real potential to offend someone because of their creative makeup, attributed associations, or whatever. The point is that it’s impossible to go through life without offending someone. It doesn’t matter how good at tip-toeing on egg shells you are; you will always find a way to offend at least one person. This is what it is to live in the real world. Besides, if you’re content to take such a timid approach, odds are that you’re a very boring and uninteresting person to talk to.
Ultimately, people need to be able to realize and understand what the desire is of the person using a hot-word. Once they do so, then they can formulate the best appropriate response. Is this person legitimately trying to harm or inspire me with what they are saying? Are they just goofing around with no ill-intention meant? Are they trying to psyche me out to get an advantage over me? These are the kinds of questions people need to ask themselves instead of resorting to a universal knee-jerk response of outrage; however artificial it may be.
People generally aren’t as strong willed as they used to be. Most don’t have the life experiences needed to properly cope with intermediate conflicts in their lives because of sheltered lifestyles and overprotective parenting. I’ll always remember the time I was around 9 years old fishing with my grand pappy. We caught this catfish and he laid it out on the boat directly in front of me and gutted it while it was still alive. I still remember what it looked like gasping for air as its entrails were being tossed out into the water. It scarred me a little, but that was good for me. Scars toughen you up. Scars give you the opportunity to grow. Scars grant you the preparation you need for when things actually get really tough.
Toughness is 99% mental. It’s comprised of willpower and emotional maturity. It is part of the reason most people tend to stop crying from scraped knees as they grow and develop.
People need to toughen up. Words can only hurt you if you allow them to. It’s not like if somebody were to actually plunge a knife into your sternum. Most children are given this lesson at an early age from the expression “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” It seems fewer people are taking that to heart these days.
I meant everything I said here and said what I meant. If you can’t respect my open and reasonable honesty and would genuinely prefer I write you some 500 character unban letter we all know is bullshit that won’t solve anything, maybe you’ve got the wrong priorities. I’m looking for a conclusion to this so it never happens again. I’m playing to win and have fun while doing it, not to look over my shoulder while I play, and not to be hit with entirely subjective bans despite what some may want to believe.
Remember, I follow all black and white rules to the letter. It really just depends on if you really want solve this or just assert the power that’s been granted to you at your own discretion based off subjective criteria the majority of the public knows is completely unfair by the way it was written to be handled.
Lots of admins with differing sets of ideas, life experiences, personal feelings coupled with extremely vague and subjective rules = the perfect formula for unfairness, abuse, prejudiced decision making and glaring double standards. This is a fact. It doesn’t really matter how much you discuss such decisions amongst yourselves in voice chat because it’s always going to exist because of how flawed the system in place is.
So there it is. If you can’t handle what I honestly said and think it more appropriate that I write some 500 word paragraph of absolute bullshit, further confined by completely unrealistic conditions and stipulations meant to silence any opposing viewpoints that run contrary to your own, so be it.
I’d rather die standing on my feet, being true to my character as a human being, than begging on my hands and fuckin knees with lies on my tongue. But, if you do prefer blatant lies meant to appease your ego and patronize your common sense, you won’t have to wonder why there are so many two-faced, passive-aggressive, lying snakes and weasels in the world. Because it’s people like you who enable them, encourage them, and allow them to flourish.
Spook, out.
*Drops the mic and walks off the stage*
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