I could see how it would be rough without a guild, for someone who doesnt care ultimately about personal k/d, although, a little thick skin, and an attempt on your part to make friends, will go along way.
If you have a guild and its still this way, well your in the wrong one...
You've also got to know, or figure out, that CRPG, is an established group of mostly long term players, that like to stick it too each other and newbs, like some of the more edgy internet forum communities out there. I guess thats what passes for 'cool' these days, and frankly, it can be pretty funny at times, once you dont take it personal and start meeting people. There are, alot of fun people here, you just gotta get in on the jokes, without making yourself a target by taking them seriously.
I would suggest trying to get into a guild. Snowhawk clan is taking on recruits at a small trickle, but we're fairly insular, and lookin for peeps that want to play this, and alot of other games, where not looking for an alliance of numbers for a single title. we'd rather lose, than take on faceless zerglings. We DO like people who are specialists,, like teamwork, and a place to call home for multiple games.... We've gained enough rep over the years, that we have a few Heroes as well, and we do better than the average bear in just about every title we take on, because we're tight like that, play as a team, and know each other well... Good place if you want to make friends, not just leech off a zerg for a particular title. if your looking to leech for a single title, and not be on vent etc, dont even bother though, Snowhawks dont take kindly to people lookin for a ride. We want people that want to be part of a long term barbarian themed clan with real friendships. You know yourself. Check us out if your interested, you can find us in the clans section, or better yet google Snowhawk clan. Just be forwarned, we are a Barbarian themed cimmerian clan, and act like it most of the time, a little harsh, direct, but, a family that works as a team. we're also 18 and over only.
I dont know enough about the other guilds, to send you in another direction, but perhaps someone here can list for you some other options. I strongly recommend the guild route though. If you fly solo, you'll need to suck it up and make it harden you, CRPG aint for the feint of heart (and I wouldnt want it any other way!)