Author Topic: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE  (Read 1639 times)

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Offline Ricky77

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #15 on: March 18, 2012, 06:00:02 am »
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Three men are on a desert island when they find a lamp, rub it, and a genie grants them three wishes.  They discuss things, and realize they need to figure out a way to get off of the island.

One man wishes he was a little smarter, and he immediately swims off of the island.

The second man man wishes he was a lot smarter, so he spends some time, constructs a small raft, and sails himself off of the island.

This leaves the final man, who has been left behind, and can't figure his way out - so he wishes to become a genius!  He then walks over the bridge.

um im sory, when i read it i didint laugh. but go go go make another one, u got 15 min left.

Offline Tanken

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #16 on: March 18, 2012, 06:00:19 am »
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A dog went to the post office, took out a blank piece of paper and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "but that would make no fucking sense at all!"
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Offline RibaldRon

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #17 on: March 18, 2012, 06:00:52 am »
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um im sory, when i read it i didint laugh. but go go go make another one, u got 15 min left.
Perhaps you haven't heard of the rabbit that likes to jump off of bridges?

They call him the Easter Bungee.
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Offline Tanken

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #18 on: March 18, 2012, 06:05:49 am »
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I've got a joke for you.

(click to show/hide)
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Offline Ricky77

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #19 on: March 18, 2012, 06:08:00 am »
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I've got a joke for you.

(click to show/hide)

I THINK U WIN, JUST TO BE FAIR I WILL ALLOW 1 MORE JOKE FROM ANYONE IN THE NEXT 10 MIN GO GO GO .

Offline TurmoilTom

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #20 on: March 18, 2012, 06:08:12 am »
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A man sees a hunter loading some dead animals into the back of his truck late at night. He walks over to see what game the hunter got. The first thing he sees is a dead squirrel, with a bullet hole in its head. Right between the eyes. The man exclaims, "Wow, what a good shot!" The hunter replies, "Thanks." The second thing the man sees is a deer. It was shot in the same spot; between the eyes. The man exclaims, "Wow, what a good shot!" the hunter replies, "Thanks." Finally the man notices a BEAR. A BEAR. The weird thing about the bear is that it has a hole in its head, between the eyes, but also holes in both of its paws. The man asks the hunter, "What happened to the bear?" The hunter replies, "Oh, funny story about that. When I shined my flashlight in his eyes he covered up his face with his paws!"

Offline RibaldRon

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #21 on: March 18, 2012, 06:09:44 am »
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I THINK U WIN, JUST TO BE FAIR I WILL ALLOW 1 MORE JOKE FROM ANYONE IN THE NEXT 10 MIN GO GO GO .
A truck driver was moving a man's stuff to his new home, when he comes upon a bridge in the middle of nowhere, which is unfortunately broken.  The closest gas station is on the other side, and he's low on gas, so he decides to spend some time looking through the man's things.

He is digging through some junk when he brushes a genie's lamp.  The genie is very grateful to have been released after all of this time, and allows the man ONE wish.

Being a simple man, with his mind set on a job well done, he asks that the genie repair the bridge.  "Are you kidding!  Just think of all the work involved!  That is a massive undertaking.. can't you think of something else?"

So the man thinks long and hard - after all, fixing the bridge will benefit but one person in the long run.  So the man asks, "Would it be possible for you to make it so we Men could understand Women just a little bit better?"

And the genie said "How wide do you want this bridge?"
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Offline Ricky77

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #22 on: March 18, 2012, 06:12:12 am »
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A truck driver was moving a man's stuff to his new home, when he comes upon a bridge in the middle of nowhere, which is unfortunately broken.  The closest gas station is on the other side, and he's low on gas, so he decides to spend some time looking through the man's things.

He is digging through some junk when he brushes a genie's lamp.  The genie is very grateful to have been released after all of this time, and allows the man ONE wish.

Being a simple man, with his mind set on a job well done, he asks that the genie repair the bridge.  "Are you kidding!  Just think of all the work involved!  That is a massive undertaking.. can't you think of something else?"

So the man thinks long and hard - after all, fixing the bridge will benefit but one person in the long run.  So the man asks, "Would it be possible for you to make it so we Men could understand Women just a little bit better
And the genie said "How wide do you want this bridge?"

THIS IS FUNNY, BUT BRIDGES :P. anyways, tanken gets the 100k, tom gets 50k, and ron u get 30k . all funny jokes,if u wish to claim ur gold, add me on steam .ricky7hendler

Offline TurmoilTom

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #23 on: March 18, 2012, 06:12:44 am »
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THIS IS FUNNY, BUT BRIDGES :P. anyways, tanken gets the 100k, tom gets 50k, and ron u get 30k . all funny jokes,if u wish to claim ur gold, add me on steam .ricky7hendler

Groovy.

Offline RibaldRon

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #24 on: March 18, 2012, 06:14:20 am »
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THIS IS FUNNY, BUT BRIDGES :P. anyways, tanken gets the 100k, tom gets 50k, and ron u get 30k . all funny jokes,if u wish to claim ur gold, add me on steam .ricky7hendler
Sorry, bridges are all I know.  There were some real classics in this thread.  :mrgreen:
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Offline Ricky77

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #25 on: March 18, 2012, 06:15:58 am »
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Sorry, bridges are all I know.  There were some real classics in this thread.  :mrgreen:
:D . i saw this i thought it was funny, but yes u all get some stuf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5QGkOGZubQ

Offline RibaldRon

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #26 on: March 18, 2012, 06:17:31 am »
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Offline Ricky77

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Offline Tanken

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #28 on: March 18, 2012, 06:22:17 am »
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I win

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Offline TurmoilTom

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Re: PRESENTS FOR EVERYONE
« Reply #29 on: March 18, 2012, 06:33:17 am »
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0hCy7I6KheA like a boss

Post a video in a thread that Tom sent you five minutes ago like a boss.