Norse Horde -- Operation: Mjölnir, Wed 2/29, 10pm eastern

[Slamz]

This video explains our current strategic situation:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBGOQ7SsJrw


The dastardly Mercs stole from us our homeland, evicted us and placed a ruinous tax upon the land, such that none can work there.

Then they sauntered out of the village with a load of goods, as if to say, "Look what we have looted from you!  You who are too small and weak to threaten us!  Watch as we prosper from your misfortune!"


Wednesday, 2/29 at 10pm eastern, the Norse shall seek a small portion of their revenge!

330 armed Norsemen descend upon 198 Mercs and their caravan of ill-begotten goods.  Help us exact revenge upon our enemies!

And if you do not listen, then to hell with you!

[FRANK_THE_TANK]

I'm listening sheesh man :/

I'm no use to you though. Good luck with the spastic random map generator, I had an insane map yesterday. Giant cliffs every where, I'm just glad they didn't turn up MW stones would have been enough to turn that map into a blood bath.

[Noctivagant]

You know I'm bored of your "misfortune" stories, we attacked you after getting wiped and we spawn raped you with less troops in NA ping. We did not attack you after taking your village and let you stay there at least a month. Now we have to consider our own interest.
Now cry me a river.

[Tavuk_Bey]

And if you do not listen, then to hell with you!

that's noice..

[Turboflex]

You know I'm bored of your "misfortune" stories, we attacked you after getting wiped and we spawn raped you with less troops in NA ping. We did not attack you after taking your village and let you stay there at least a month. Now we have to consider our own interest.
Now cry me a river.

You should have axed yourself if it was in your interest to make mortal enemies of a viking clan.

[Noctivagant]

You should have axed yourself if it was in your interest to make mortal enemies of a viking clan.

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Imagine that flute was something else.
Cheers.

[Slamz]

Imagine that flute was something else.

Good plan!  Imagine, for example, the flute was an axe:

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Also, apparently Mercs have a bald spot.

And dress like monks.

And scream like small girls.

[Digglez]

I approve this campaign marketing

[Slamz]

In related news, a large Merc force was spotted leaving Ambean headed southeast in the direction of Mechin.

We expect they are coming to shake hands and either offer their surrender or pick up the bodies of their dead, which we shall leave behind.  They have a group of 600 and a group of 100 troops, both "lightly armed".

[Digglez]

the power of Thor crushed these haggard bandits

[Slamz]

Thanks for all who attended!  The Viking's Revenge continues upon those who brought death to our once peaceful lands.  198 Merc corpses littered the fields while 148 brave Norsemen went to quaff mead in Valhalla.  We stole the Merc's goods and horses but not their women because daaaaaamn, they ugly.


Payouts have been sent (in Strat gold) using the secret recipe.

(click to show/hide)

5 gold per kill-squared divided by (deaths or kills/5), whichever is more -- basically granting bonuses up to a 5:1 KDR

Top winners:
First place -- Invicti_Despot_MrShine 15:4 for 281 gold
Second place -- NH_Diggles 11:2 for 275 gold
Third place -- Hospitaller_Aderyn 10:1 for 250 gold

[Slamz]

Note:

There are 3 more upcoming NH battles --

Mercs 50 vs NH_Stigr_Bjornsson 128
Mercs 100 vs NorseHorde 49
Mercs 32 vs NorseHorde 48

None of these people have gear on the NH side.  The last one seems to have no gear on either side so it will be a naked peasant battle (as in literally a fistfight to the death).

I will sign people up and you are welcome to attend if you just want some XP but there will probably be no payout or effort made beyond accepting people who want in.

(NH_Stigr hasn't joined NH in Strategus yet so it's up to him to do invites for that one.)


In other news, I think Mercs are mad.

(click to show/hide)

So mad.

[Digglez]

Thanks for all who attended!  The Viking's Revenge continues upon those who brought death to our once peaceful lands.  198 Merc corpses littered the fields while 148 brave Norsemen went to quaff mead in Valhalla.  We stole the Merc's goods and horses but not their women because daaaaaamn, they ugly.


Payouts have been sent (in Strat gold) using the secret recipe.

(click to show/hide)

5 gold per kill-squared divided by (deaths or kills/5), whichever is more -- basically granting bonuses up to a 5:1 KDR

Top winners:
First place -- Invicti_Despot_MrShine 15:4 for 281 gold
Second place -- NH_Diggles 11:2 for 275 gold
Third place -- Hospitaller_Aderyn 10:1 for 250 gold

surely you can spare more coin to these brave warriors. how else will the pay the bards to listen to the songs written of them!

[Slamz]

Actually it's too late once the payment is sent -- the fields become uneditable.  Although we can certainly adjust the formula for future battles.

Although I would like to point out that 200 strat gold is equal to over 3 hours of play in cRPG (at 1 gold per tick and 1 tick per minute -- you get 2 gold at x5 but you get 0 gold at x1.  I don't make these rules!)  Under the formula I used, we gave out about 2500 strat gold in total.  Invicti_Despot_MrShine basically got over 4 and a half hours worth of gold at cRPG generation rates, for fighting in a 14 minute battle.

Besides, as far as I can tell, the NH rate for paying conscripts is infinity percent higher than what other clans pay.  (How much did you people on the Merc roster get paid, I am wondering?)


But I suppose for future battles I could up the payout.  Or we could even say something like "we will pay out a total of 5000 gold for this battle" and then I can tweak the formula til it hits that mark.  (Anything is possible when you use Google Docs Spreadsheets!)

[BaleOhay]

man I did not know there was a competition! Did I at least come in 4th!