Semenstorm looking for EU Mercs!

[HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING]

While on a very important top secret mission to bring peace and much needed supplies to the lands known as EU (Pronounced Ewwww), our fearless Rohypnol was attacked by an army of heathens known as "Crusader Alliance". While it has not yet been proven, there is speculation that these "Crusaders" are acting on the orders of the mysterious Sperg Lord terrorist known only as 'Kesh'.

It is also believed that this 'Kesh' might have had a significant part in the Attack on Sandy Hook Elementary School, Anthrax, the deaths of Michael Jackson, Amy Winehouse, Heath Ledger, and most recently the bombing of the Boston Marathon.

So I now ask for the help of any EU Mercs willing to help defend us Amerimy old friends. Fighting for Semenstorm is also in the best interest of Eu (eww) as well, because if we can win this battle today, we might be able to connect Crusaders to the elusive Kesh and stop her before she completes her goal of destroying all of CRPG (including Eww).

All help will be greatly appreciated. Rubejobs and gold will be paid for good performance. As well as payment for good scores, I'm offering a 20k gold reward to the first person to find and kill the sneaky red headed slut! So sign up now.
http://c-rpg.net/index.php?page=battlesupcoming#!?page=battleroster&id=3486

[Casimir]

We just want our banner back

[HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING]

Hopefully our banner will be updated in game soon, we're getting tired of your banner.

[Casimir]

I find archers tend to aim for the cross

[HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING]

I find archers tend to aim for the cross

As do Jews, I know i'd go for it.

[Keshian]

In top secret corridors it was known that Rohypnol was smuggling plutonium from the Russians back to the NA seeking to create a dirty bomb that threatens the lives of hard-working calradians.  Top-secret agent "Red Death" otherwise known as "Kesh" (while under deep-cover with the terrorists) learned of this plot and has hired the services of a group of german prostitute-killers to stop the plutonium from reaching NA calradia.  However, many Russians and Poles have come to the help of Rohypnol raising concerns that this conspiracy is widespread.  The CIA (Calradian Intelligence Agency) is confident the arms dealer Rohypnol will be apprehended before damage is done.

P.S.  i actually had absolutely nothing to do with this attack whatsoever, I just like mercing for Templars and SB so I can hear those German and Russian accents while fighting.

Also, MERICCA, FUCK YEAH!

[HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING]

In top secret corridors it was known that Rohypnol was smuggling plutonium from the Russians back to the NA seeking to create a dirty bomb that threatens the lives of hard-working calradians.  Top-secret agent "Red Death" otherwise known as "Kesh" (while under deep-cover with the terrorists) learned of this plot and has hired the services of a group of german prostitute-killers to stop the plutonium from reaching NA calradia.  However, many Russians and Poles have come to the help of Rohypnol raising concerns that this conspiracy is widespread.  The CIA (Calradian Intelligence Agency) is confident the arms dealer Rohypnol will be apprehended before damage is done.

P.S.  i actually had absolutely nothing to do with this attack whatsoever, I just like mercing for Templars and SB so I can hear those German and Russian accents while fighting.

Also, MERICCA, FUCK YEAH!

Well after a very close battle, Rohypnol got away with the plutonium, I mean supplies for children.