cRPG

Strategus => Diplomacy => Topic started by: CALAMARI on October 27, 2014, 02:34:00 am

Title: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 27, 2014, 02:34:00 am
The great sea did part and out rose the Omega.
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"Omega, I have collected you thine most holy of items; The pope hat of Longsword, the battle standard of Bryggan, and Grandmoms staff of elderliness. What now is thy bidding?" groaned Calamari.

"Divine messenger Calamari, Seek a harbinger to wield the Holy Harpoon of New Nara. Bring death to those that shun the Omega!" hissed The Omega

"Indubitably!" retorted Calamari.

-War chamber of New Narra-

"LEGS!" howled Calamari.

"What news from the Omega?" asked Legs.

"To your tentacles!" demanded Calamari

-Calamari bestows the Holy Harpoon of New Narra to legs-

"Arise ARMS, the harbinger of the OMEGA! You shall lead the army of the Republic and purge the ASA from the desert." cried Calamari.

"Will we not be stranded in the sand?" questioned Arms.

"The Omega has granted us little pools of water. Now to war!" bellowed Calamari.

"To War!" Arms, Holiday, Deadhorse, Skinboat, Tyefire, MiaoCuiHua, Alec, Dionysius, 10k, Darth_Vader_aow, Keskimsit, Waldo, Sven, Webb, Werdy, and Wes all shout in unison.

Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 27, 2014, 02:35:06 am
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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: GOBBLINKINGREATLEADER on October 27, 2014, 02:42:58 am
That squid better be gay or this is heresy! The Holy Order of the Gay God will not have it!
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Voncrow on October 27, 2014, 03:40:45 pm
And so a dark crusade fell upon the lands of calradia.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on October 27, 2014, 08:09:55 pm
Quote from: SQUIDNAUGHT on October 27, 2014, 02:34:00 am
"Divine messenger Calamari, Seek a harbinger to wield the Holy Harpoon of New Nara. Bring death to those that shun the Omega!" hissed The Omega

sheeit

you lookin' for some "holy harpoon" go ass yo momma... las' i seen 'er she gettin' rude and rutty wit' some swarthy muthafuckas from the narra churchworks

you KNOW she feelin' that holy spirit, 'naw mean???
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on October 27, 2014, 08:10:27 pm
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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 27, 2014, 08:18:48 pm
Careful, the last person that talked about mama's got da global mute.

http://forum.melee.org/strategus-general-discussion/cmpx-harald-cheating-sanctioned-in-strategus-both-this-one-and-next-one/
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on October 27, 2014, 08:41:03 pm
for real though good RP post

good luck finishing your quest before strat ends!  :P
Title: Republic of Squids Bring the Death, Death, Death
Post by: Legs on October 28, 2014, 05:52:22 am
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Breaking news from the Republic of Squids offensive!

Bloodshed on the edge of the great Sarranid desert tonight as Les Chevaliers Occitan clashes with the Republic of Squids! Chevalier generals attempted to stonewall the advancing forces using cavalry units in the open plains outside of Weyyah Castle, but were met with limited success. The assembled LCO forces, 4,000 strong, were soundly defeated with nearly 1,800 reported casualties. The remainder was routed or summarily executed. In comparison, RoS armies suffered only 1,200 casualties overall and are determined to continue their advance.

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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on October 28, 2014, 10:15:37 am
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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: BaleOhay on October 28, 2014, 12:25:02 pm
must be nice to be on defense for a change
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: GOBBLINKINGREATLEADER on October 28, 2014, 01:52:01 pm
Quote from: WITCHCRAFT on October 28, 2014, 10:15:37 am
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god damn
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on October 28, 2014, 03:16:27 pm
What happened in Tommy's battle, flag cap?
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Balikar on October 28, 2014, 03:21:56 pm
Ran out of time
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on October 28, 2014, 05:08:27 pm
Only 400 or so killed in the time allotted?  I knew LCOH was inactive on strat, but that's pretty terrible in game...maybe it was a shit map.

le sigh, wish I was able to still play in battles (my next gen takes priority over vidya gayming tho)....ahh memories.

Next gen coming along nicely: 

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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: KaMiKaZe_JoE on October 28, 2014, 05:26:55 pm
Aaaaaaaaaw
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Balikar on October 28, 2014, 05:48:01 pm
I personally liked the map. 

The squids played it right.  They hunkered down, stuck close to their spawns, and behind their siege gear/shield wall.  They played for time, not for a flag cap, and not for a ticket kill.  I'd give the gear advantage to them as well.  There were some mistakes on LCOH's side, but they were typical strat fight mistakes, and not deciders.  Both sides played a good match. 

But in the end, due to roster sizes, time was the deciding factor.  LCOH pushed for flags, and I think another 10 minutes would have tilted it in their favor. 
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 28, 2014, 07:02:11 pm
Hurry up with that post Bonsai; I'm curious if you've defected from LCO and are joining the RoS. Also change that shitty 9pm EST-5am EST Night time.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: KaMiKaZe_JoE on October 28, 2014, 07:22:10 pm
Quote from: Balikar on October 28, 2014, 05:48:01 pm
I personally liked the map. 

The squids played it right.  They hunkered down, stuck close to their spawns, and behind their siege gear/shield wall.  They played for time, not for a flag cap, and not for a ticket kill.  I'd give the gear advantage to them as well.  There were some mistakes on LCOH's side, but they were typical strat fight mistakes, and not deciders.  Both sides played a good match. 

But in the end, due to roster sizes, time was the deciding factor.  LCOH pushed for flags, and I think another 10 minutes would have tilted it in their favor.

Didn't help that your cav, which had done so well last map (I'm looking specifically at me and my huge dick), spent the whole second match flinging themselves at our lines with kamikaze-like abandon.

I spent the whole fight just nerfing your cav right off their horses with glorious loomed light lances (which are better on foot than on horseback, apparently).
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Bryggan on October 28, 2014, 07:42:08 pm
The map was fine, its just the timers are set for 50 vs 50 battles.  One time Astralis came close to capping the flags, Squids only had 2 or 3 up, but they managed to recapture it in a hurry.

They also had my battle standard, which gives them an unfair advantage.  They captured it at the battle near New Yruma castle.  This was when we thought Mail shirts were uber gear, so even my battle standard couldn't help us there.

Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Balikar on October 29, 2014, 01:31:50 am
Just curious, but which army has which item?  Or does Legs have all three. 
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 29, 2014, 01:34:28 am
You're welcome to march a little north and find out for yourself.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Balikar on October 29, 2014, 01:47:52 am
Still recovering from the 'friendly' skirmish.  Restocking if you will. 
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Yoshi on October 29, 2014, 04:05:32 am
PRAISE THE OMEGA
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░░░░░░▀▌▒▒▐▀░░░░░░ 
░░░░░░(●)▒▒(●)░░░░░░
░░░░░░▐▄▄▄▄▌░░░░░░
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░██▌░▌▒▌░▌░▌░▌▐██░ 
░░▌░▐░▐▒▐░░▐░▐░▐░░
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I AM NOT WORTHY
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: dreadnok on October 31, 2014, 03:32:40 pm
Cool,picture.,is that lovecraft
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on October 31, 2014, 08:44:17 pm
Lost relic discovered in New Caraf Castle!

Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on October 31, 2014, 09:52:27 pm
Quote from: dreadnok on October 31, 2014, 03:32:40 pm
Cool,picture.,is that lovecraft

not even lovecraft's monsters are as depraved as what I posted
Title: It Came From Beneath the Sea
Post by: Legs on October 31, 2014, 10:46:36 pm
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Calamity at Caraf Castle!

Les Chevaliers Occitan are in an uproar today, following the Republic of Squids' siege on Caraf Castle! Attackers approached the battle conservatively, intending to use catapults and siege towers to overcome the castle walls. This soon proved unnecessary as elite RoS soldiers had deployed ladders and captured portions of the castle walls nearly immediately. Defenders were quickly overwhelmed and pushed into a small alcove - a special unit was dispatched to subdue them, and officials report that the battle was over in a matter of minutes. General Arms, commander of the Republic of Squids flagship army responsible for the victory, claims that over 2400 troops were recruited from within the castle's garrison. Further, 150,000 silver and 6800 ash saplings transported from the village of Emirin were found in the castle's treasury, along with "a LOT of gear" to be used in the continuing war effort. A portion of the saplings will be planted in the area surrounding the castle as part of the republic's green initiative, in remembrance of the fallen soldiers.

In other news: shortly after the conclusion of the Caraf Castle siege, the nearby village of Mit Nun was captured by Republic of Squids General Zuppa di Calamari, and a large unspecified number of goods were seized by Colonel Keskimsit near the territory's border.

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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 02:39:27 am
In other news, the Thirteen knight's rage remains unchecked.  Against their wishes, they are laying wast to LCO lands due to Goretooth's silly stupid attack on a 13K caravan. Albus, aka Aezrayal, took Tosdhar from them, yet still the 13 Knight's armies are running amok.  When asked about the current situation, Bryggan, commander of the 13 Knights, said, "Fuck this shit. Fuckin' fucks!  Fuck 'em til the fucking fucked cows fucking fuck."

This reporter believes he was drunk.

But, according to reports at the 13 knights official Web site ( http://justinbieber.shop.bravadousa.com/Dept.aspx?cp=21965_59338 ), the general feeling is that the 13 Knights are not happy about attacking a beleaguered faction, but the depraved actions of Goretooth demand it, for honour's sake.

Stay tuned after these messages for other breaking news.  Up next: Arys the drunken peasant almost has a bath... Almost.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Holiday203 on November 01, 2014, 08:25:27 am
Funny how gore talks so much shit to me through steam about strat battles but this makes me chuckle.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 08:34:42 am
Quote from: Holiday203 on November 01, 2014, 08:25:27 am
Funny how gore talks so much shit to me through steam about strat battles but this makes me chuckle.
And you don't upvote.  You sir, are the steppe version of Chosen1.  You down vote everyone, but seem incapable of upvoting.  You and Chosen are blood brothers.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Holiday203 on November 01, 2014, 08:40:19 am
Quote from: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 08:34:42 am
And you don't upvote.  You sir, are the steppe version of Chosen1.  You down vote everyone, but seem incapable of upvoting.  You and Chosen are blood brothers.

Upvote what? this game is shit.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Goretooth on November 01, 2014, 06:10:51 pm
Quote from: Holiday203 on November 01, 2014, 08:25:27 am
Funny how gore talks so much shit to me through steam about strat battles but this makes me chuckle.
lol okay well you won't see me playing till the ski season is over
sorry I made you cry over steam
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: njames89 on November 01, 2014, 08:51:17 pm
Quote from: Holiday203 on November 01, 2014, 08:40:19 am
Upvote what? this game is shit.

Should stop playing probably then eh?

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Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 10:26:48 pm
Might have been drunk when I wrote that post.

I don't under why so many people are so awesome when in TS, then get all pissy and nasty on forums and apparently steam.

But Goretooth, you really gotta fight us before you go chase snow bunnies.  I understand; skiing is the most awesome sport ever, and Strat is the most annoying game ever, but as you know we've been writing a lot of propaganda and we need it to culminate in a final battle so we can all stop playing.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Goretooth on November 01, 2014, 10:31:26 pm
Quote from: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 10:26:48 pm
Might have been drunk when I wrote that post.

I don't under why so many people are so awesome when in TS, then get all pissy and nasty on forums and apparently steam.

But Goretooth, you really gotta fight us before you go chase snow bunnies.  I understand; skiing is the most awesome sport ever, and Strat is the most annoying game ever, but as you know we've been writing a lot of propaganda and we need it to culminate in a final battle so we can all stop playing.
sorry already left two weeks ago.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Oreo on November 02, 2014, 06:01:45 pm
Wow, was I mentioned in the OP?

I've never worn a Pope hat before, but I'll take it.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: traxits on November 02, 2014, 06:44:53 pm
Quote from: Goretooth on November 01, 2014, 10:31:26 pm
sorry already left two weeks ago.
you little dickfart cumbubble half retarded fuck we were supposed to have another battle so i could kick your cock gobbling hospimy old friendgler ass
how could you do this to me you fucking mustard tiger
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CALAMARI on November 02, 2014, 06:55:18 pm
Quote from: Oreo on November 02, 2014, 06:01:45 pm
Wow, was I mentioned in the OP?

I've never worn a Pope hat before, but I'll take it.

You have won the battle against iK_KbW_FFC_Longsword_TVF_MB:
353 Reinforced Crested Solak Helmet with Plume looted
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: Oreo on November 03, 2014, 03:34:25 am
Oh, I am but a pawn on the Strat map.

I hate those hats, I have no idea why they're loomed.
Why can't we just look good and pretty like Occitan troops?

No.  We gotta be the retards in Pope hats.
Title: Re: Pie Jesu domine, dona eis requiem
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on November 03, 2014, 08:08:03 pm
Quote from: Bryggan on November 01, 2014, 10:26:48 pm
Might have been drunk when I wrote that post.

I don't under why so many people are so awesome when in TS, then get all pissy and nasty on forums and apparently steam.

But Goretooth, you really gotta fight us before you go chase snow bunnies.  I understand; skiing is the most awesome sport ever, and Strat is the most annoying game ever, but as you know we've been writing a lot of propaganda and we need it to culminate in a final battle so we can all stop playing.

I'll fight you (well my strat char will, I most likely wouldn't be able to make the battle). 
Title: Attack on Dhirim
Post by: Legs on November 14, 2014, 04:55:48 am

New Dhirim has fallen!

Fear the mighty seamen of the Republic of Squids!