cRPG

cRPG => General Discussion => Topic started by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:36:57 pm

Title: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:36:57 pm
So, this is a good one.

There is an archer playing battle, and he's talking to Tydeus in TS.  He tells him "I'll bet you 1 LP that when the next round starts I can start shooting and headshot their whole team before anyone dies in melee."  Tydeus is no dummy, so he agrees to the bet.

The next round starts and the archer goes nuts.  He's blasting arrows across the map, but they aren't hitting anything.  He keeps shooting -- he's hitting his teammates, killing their horses.  He keeps firing wildly, non-stop.  He starts headshotting his own infantry, they are dying everywhere.  Arrows are still spraying all over -- he's hitting everything EXCEPT the enemy team.  Finally he headshots Tydeus himself.  Round over.

Tydeus is laughing his ass off in TS, and so is the archer.  Finally Tydeus speaks up, his glee apparent in his voice, "You idiot, why are you fucking laughing?  You missed the enemy team completely and now you owe me a LP!" 

The archer replies cheerfully "No prob, I'm good for it."  He PMs a couple guys and then puts the trade up.  "Pretty neat huh?"

Tydeus says, "Yeah, great for me, but you lost a LP you dork."

The archer replies, "Yeah well I just bet those two guys over there 2 LPs each that I could ignore enemy, headshot my entire team, headshot Tydeus, and he'd be happy about it!"
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:39:09 pm
eh?  eh?
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Krex on June 05, 2014, 06:39:14 pm
Haha:D

EDIT:its ok,not good,not bad
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Austrian on June 05, 2014, 06:39:55 pm
Ha.Ha.
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on June 05, 2014, 06:48:24 pm
So an EU player, an NA player, and a CN player walk into a bar...
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: IR_Kuoin on June 05, 2014, 06:52:20 pm
Here's a good one

chadz released a new patch
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:58:00 pm
If you want to see something REALLY funny, read this guys posts:
 http://c-rpg.net/index.php?page=charstats (http://c-rpg.net/index.php?page=charstats)


Zing!  Doh!  LOL!
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Krex on June 05, 2014, 07:14:12 pm
Quote from: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:58:00 pm
If you want to see something REALLY funny, read this guys posts:
 http://c-rpg.net/index.php?page=charstats (http://c-rpg.net/index.php?page=charstats)


Zing!  Doh!  LOL!
Nice try
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: XyNox on June 05, 2014, 07:14:41 pm
Im surprised nobody got the Desparado reference yet.
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Falka on June 05, 2014, 07:15:11 pm
Quote from: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:36:57 pm
(click to show/hide)

Uh, uh! I got that reference :P

PS. Damn u Xynox :P
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 07:17:45 pm
Quote from: XyNox on June 05, 2014, 07:14:41 pm
Im surprised nobody got the Desparado reference yet.

I was waiting for someone to put that, but I figured posting during EU prime time would delay the revelation.  :)  I saw that movie last weekend, a classic!
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: 722_ on June 05, 2014, 07:18:46 pm
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: FleetFox on June 05, 2014, 08:34:19 pm
hehe pretty good actually :P
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Tydeus on June 05, 2014, 08:40:10 pm
Quote from: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 06:36:57 pm
So, this is a good one.

There is an archer playing battle, and he's talking to Tydeus in TS.  He tells him "I'll bet you 1 LP that when the next round starts I can start shooting and headshot their whole team before anyone dies in melee."  Tydeus is no dummy, so he agrees to the bet.

The next round starts and the archer goes nuts.  He's blasting arrows across the map, but they aren't hitting anything.  He keeps shooting -- he's hitting his teammates, killing their horses.  He keeps firing wildly, non-stop.  He starts headshotting his own infantry, they are dying everywhere.  Arrows are still spraying all over -- he's hitting everything EXCEPT the enemy team.  Finally he headshots Tydeus himself.  Round over.

Tydeus is laughing his ass off in TS, and so is the archer.  Finally Tydeus speaks up, his glee apparent in his voice, "You idiot, why are you fucking laughing?  You missed the enemy team completely and now you owe me a LP!" 

The archer replies cheerfully "No prob, I'm good for it."  He PMs a couple guys and then puts the trade up.  "Pretty neat huh?"

Tydeus says, "Yeah, great for me, but you lost a LP you dork."

The archer replies, "Yeah well I just bet those two guys over there 2 LPs each that I could ignore enemy, headshot my entire team, headshot Tydeus, and he'd be happy about it!"
How are we supposed to make easy LPs now that you went and made this post?
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Gravoth_iii on June 05, 2014, 08:42:51 pm
ban for teamkilling
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: SirCymro_Crusader on June 05, 2014, 09:07:10 pm
Best joke of cRPG...

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: no_rules_just_play on June 05, 2014, 09:24:45 pm
Haha did this seriously happen? :D I expected a shitty joke, but this was a great read:p
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Penitent on June 05, 2014, 11:23:13 pm
Quote from: no_rules_just_play on June 05, 2014, 09:24:45 pm
Haha did this seriously happen? :D I expected a shitty joke, but this was a great read:p

Glad you liked it!  It's not an original joke, but one I adapted for all my crpg friends and lovelies. :)
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Kafein on June 05, 2014, 11:52:58 pm
visitors can't see pics , please register or login
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Macropus on June 06, 2014, 12:09:20 am
Here is the russian joke incoming...
A DRZ guy was walking through a forest when he saw a burning car. He took a seat inside and burned too.
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Rebelyell on June 06, 2014, 12:59:00 am
Quote from: Kafein on June 05, 2014, 11:52:58 pm
visitors can't see pics , please register or login

my brain is retarded
it took my like 2 min
(click to show/hide)
to figure it out
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Kafein on June 06, 2014, 01:04:35 am
Quote from: Macropus on June 06, 2014, 12:09:20 am
Here is the russian joke incoming...
A DRZ guy was walking through a forest when he saw a burning car. He took a seat inside and burned too.

visitors can't see pics , please register or login
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Canary on June 06, 2014, 07:20:24 am
Here's a p good crpg joke:

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: isatis on June 06, 2014, 03:16:12 pm
Quote from: Kafein on June 05, 2014, 11:52:58 pm
(click to show/hide)

This was a problem to solve in one of my high school math contest hahaha
Be A and B, two meme characters
Let figure the evolution of their wealth with an initial condition of 0$ for both.
box 1 :

A = -20$
B= -20$

Box 2

A= -50$
B= 10$

Box 3
A= -10
B= 10

Box 4
B is happy and A is alaso happy but wrecked
L2Math you scrub!
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on June 07, 2014, 01:18:40 am
Quote from: WITCHCRAFT on June 05, 2014, 06:48:24 pm
So an EU player, an NA player, and a CN player walk into a bar...

[pretend body of joke is here]

...and as the last one is leaving the bartender says "I bet he'll remember the difference now!"
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Tiger on June 07, 2014, 01:42:38 am
Quote from: WITCHCRAFT on June 05, 2014, 06:48:24 pm
So an EU player, an NA player, and a CN player walk into a bar...

Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Legs on June 07, 2014, 02:04:35 am
An aspiring stripper sees an advertisement for pole-dancing lessons. Eager to improve her moves she heads to the address listed. Walking inside she's overwhelmed by the stench of flop sweat and rotten ejaculate. Her eyes slowly adjust to the dim interior, lit only by the glare of a computer screen. Before her she sees the assembled pikemen of cRPG. "I-is this the pole dancing class?" she asks reluctantly. One of the men steps forward wordlessly, gripping a long pole. Jumping and spinning he deftly twirls the pole around and around, somehow managing not to strike any of the delicate computer equipment or empty Mountain Dew cans stacked throughout the room. For a moment the pudgy and pimpled nerd seems to be the most beautiful thing in the world. The woman bows and eagerly asks him to teach her. He solemnly nods in response. The pikemen spend all day piking her and all night poking her. The end.

Quote from: WITCHCRAFT on June 07, 2014, 01:18:40 am
why bother with expensive cleaning supplies? let nature take its course and let Ants do the cleaning for you! give them a few hours on any soiled food preperation surface and they'll take everything gross back to their tidy little home - leaving you tidy and clean too. remember high school biology? remember that neat word symbiosis? That's what this is. Neat huh?! Yea!

One time I tried building an ant-powered dishwasher, but the whole thing was a wash.

Lol puns.
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: Johammeth on June 07, 2014, 03:27:39 am
Quote from: Legs on June 07, 2014, 02:04:35 am
One time I tried building an ant-powered dishwasher, but the whole thing was a wash.


Sounds like you had a

buggy design.
Title: Re: A joke for all your CRPGers out there
Post by: WITCHCRAFT on June 07, 2014, 08:32:41 am
One day a man walks into a bar and to his amazement, he finds a tiny Greek man playing a tiny piano. Stunned, the man asked the bartender where he got the Greek. The bartender pulled out a bronze oil lamp and said "if you rub this magic lamp the genie inside will come forth and grant you one wish.

The man grabbed the oil lamp and rubbed it. The genie appeared and in a thundering voice stated "I shall grant you one wish, no more no less."

The man wished for 1,000,000 bucks, but instead, got 1,000,000 ducks. Infuriated, the man stormed towards the bartender and screamed "I asked your fucking genie for 1,000,000 bucks but i got 1,000,000 ducks.

"No duh", replied the bartender, "Do you really think I asked for a 12 inch PANOS?"