I read CrazyCracka's post twice before it dawned on me.
He's going to be a father.
Poor kid.
Love you too. My son will be great, just like me.
First time he cries, he's getting hung outside in a tree til he calms down
No but seriously I'll teach him to be assertive. I won't tolerate him being a bully, but he will stick up for himself. I'll expose him to all sorts of culture. He'll be exposed to music, art, science, technology, sports, history, biology (animals and stuff). He'll be well rounded, and he can choose his own destiny.
I've been calling the fetus boy "Wendell" but I'm pretty sure we're going to either name him Trent (after Trent Reznor) or Dexter (from the TV show).