You should grow a neckbeard before you dog on it. So much easier to keep groomed (cuz you do it only 4 times a year) and it keeps my entire neck warm. I grow mine primarily for my religion (Jewish) and do not shave--only trim with scissors or some electric razor that does a cutting maneuver instead of razing it (I know, it sounds weird, but that's what we believe). Neckbeards are great though, only time it sucks is when you get it wet, or dribble food onto your beard and forget about it. I've found all sorts of things in my neckbeard; keys, numbers, worms, food, and pokemon cards even. A neckbeard is a majestic creature if raised by a responsible parent and should be treated as a unique identifier to ones personality as many wizards had neckbeards as well. So in a way, all 'Neckbeards' are Wizards, and all Wizards are Neckbeards. Next time you see a man with a neckbeard; They're easy to identify--usually way out of fashion, a few sizes too small on their clothing, and may or may not be sporting a smelly 'furry' tail hanging out the back of their Reebok 1998 B-ball shorts, you should give them a big fucking hug and high-5. Because who knows? That Neckbeard could go on to do great things, and you'll be glad to look upon their furry mane one day and say, "Damn, I hi-5'd and belly-fucked that guy. You rock Neckbeard."
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loginTo be honest, I have no clue where the fuck I was going with any of this--or was not directing it at anyone. Just waiting on Kinzie (pictured above with permission) to get the hell out of the Shower.