I wan't to say something. I want to say something that doesn't spew anger and hatred towards people I will never meet. I want this very badly. But there is a block. I feel it in the form of bile rising from my stomach up to my mouth. My heart begins to pump and I can feel the pounding in my head as my veins pulse with heat. My jaw clenches and my eyes narrow. And I end up deleting whatever message it is with a resigned sigh and bury my feelings deeper inside in a vain attempt to remember the good times with fondness. Yet every remembered second I spent playing this game and loving it adds to the inferno inside of me and I cannot stop my thoughts from racing and the rage from mounting. The way people in this game act and the continuous rationalization and reinforcement of these actions I can no longer abide silently.
The self assured smug pompous bastards believing naively that they are a more worthy member of an internet community because they are in such and such clan and receive such and such score. Because "man all those occitan guys are so swell" even when they are among the most arrogant perpetrators of this vile debauchery of smugness. To sit around- oh and I have been around- to hear these fools perpetuate their belief that they are above the common faculties of common courtesy and believe that they are something special because they play a pathetic mod of an even more pathetic game- and they are good at it. They get together in their teamspeaks and pat themselves on the back and act like utter neanderthals in their posts and receive countless upvotes from their adoring masses who aspire to be so smug. Look no further than Daruvian who has been sustained and reinforced that acting like a pompous douche and more importantly genuinely believing he is better than others will get you far in this community. Look no further than the hate mongering of new clans with new members who threaten the status quo of the cool internet kids club. People who act kindly to you but treat others like filth are not good people. Yet you fools who I though were above this have fallen into the lie whole heartedly. Believing yourselves important slobs surrounded by decadence you are too blind to see. "Oh he is such a nice guy" because he is an admin a respected member of a community built upon disrespect. You who embrace wholeheartedly the term sperg are no better than the ignorant friends who perpetuate the use of the word nigga. You sicken me and are fully deserving of my hate and disdain.
And yet I suffered this vile filth for too long- believing that the disgust in my stomach was unwarranted. That for every asshole pompous douche like Mr Pibb- who by and large for a very long time has been an immense proponent of internet douchebaggery- there is a Mr Pink.
You disgust me. How well you all now fit into this shitmunity. I envy you to be honest. How you can come together and pat yourselves on the back with your smug words. To shout praise in hopes that going along with everyone else you will become well liked and fit in. Go on and assure each other with a nice pat on the back of what good guys you are and praise your community heroes. Go upvote joe's mindless dribble and exclaim how hilarious and inventive it was and how your sides are stitched from laughter. Go numbly praise the admins and the devs and try and receive your recognition like a pig rolling in mud. Talk about how swell those MB and Occitan guys are who wouldn't even give you the time of day if you were me. Go root around you filthy animals. You fake fuckers disgust me.
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