Former my old friends/Bandits/Saracen Thread of Awesomeness, Bad Behaviour and Strategus!

[Reyiz]

As i got bored of wearing pink slippers and other zombie games, i thought bringing some different things to my miserable life would be good. I look after these creatures nowadays and they are really fun ^^

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[Molly]

I just got worried about you

[Reyiz]

They are eating alive worms and fruit flies i can send you the vids if you want

[Molly]

Upload them to youtube

[Reyiz]

yep I will but later. btw in germany there are a lot of tarantula producers. can you send me some species if i give you the names ? like Chromatopelma cyaneopubescens

[Molly]

Lemme think. No.

[Panos_]

rebellious & grumpy, Pancake going full full retard and acting like a pimpled teenager instead of grown-up bear-sized military man

You know, when others were teenagers doing retarded things, I wasn`t be able to. So I think I deserve to act like a retard for a couple more years

[djavo]

I'll send you some black widows, we have plenty of them here

[Molly]

A classic which fits right into our holy faction hall. I found it in the spam section. How could I forget about these:

Careful!

A quote from the comment section:

Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

First of all, for taste I would rate these a 5. So good. Soft, true-to-taste fruit flavors like the sugar variety...I was a happy camper.

BUT (or should I say BUTT), not long after eating about 20 of these all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me.

Then came the, uh, flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroyd, the sounds, like trumpets calling the demons back to Hell...the stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear of succumbing to my own odors.

But wait; there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a coffee straw. I swear my sphincters were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile vomiting a torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. NAPALM. It was actually a bit humorous (for a nanosecond)as it was just beyond anything I could imagine possible.

AND IT WENT ON FOR HOURS.

I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005.

I had FIVE POUNDS of these innocent-looking delicious-tasting HELLBEARS so I told a friend about what happened to me, thinking it HAD to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute, and in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her chances and take them off my hands.

Silly woman. All of the same for her, and a phone call from her while on the toilet (because you kinda end up living in the bathroom for a spell) telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying.

Her sister was skeptical and suspected that we were exaggerating. She took them to work, since there was still 99% of a 5 pound bag left. She works for a construction company, where there are builders, roofers, house painters, landscapers, etc. Lots of people who generally have limited access to toilets on a given day. I can't imagine where all of those poor men (and women) pooped that day. I keep envisioning men on roofs, crossing their legs and trying to decide if they can make it down the ladder, or if they should just jump.

If you order these, best of luck to you. And please, don't post a video review during the aftershocks.

PS: When I ordered these, the warnings and disclaimers and legalese were NOT posted. I'm not a moron. Also, not sure why so many people assume I'm a man. I am a woman. We poop too. Of course, our poop sparkles and smells like a walk in a meadow of wildflowers. Thanks for all the great comments. I've been enjoying reading them and so glad that the horror show I experienced from snacking on these has at least made some people smile.

[Gnjus]

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[Reyiz]

are you playing this shit ?

[Gnjus]

are you playing this shit ?

No I just tried Europa Barbarorum mod for Rome Total War today, eagerly awaiting Barbarorum 2. 

[Gnjus]

Played it a bit and guess what happened: I'm a red faction in the top right corner, I conquer all the surrounding towns and get to the purple one who is my ally.......i think to myself: "I won't provoke war with allies when I have a blue faction with thousands of armies just to the south, I'll deal with them first". I go to deal with the blue guy while the purple scum attacks my towns from behind and breaks our alliance. Lesson of the day: always strike the first blow when you have the chance, even if its striking your ally. Be a treacherous scum yourself rather than getting your ass backstabbed. Either I haven't played Total War games for too long or this Barbarorum AI is better than vanilla.

[Cicero]

The new prophet rise from Greece ;

Aleksandro Papayergiu

[Thryn]

shit I just voted in that poll

AND I DIDN'T READ THE LAST ONE AND I COULDN'T VOTE PANOS AS A COMMUNIST

I'M JUST SO ANGRY RIGHT NAOW

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