Author Topic: Think you are strong, brave; an indestructible marshmallow making machine?  (Read 2844 times)

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Offline CrazyCracka420

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Offline yashichi

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Offline Lt_Anders

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Offline yashichi

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I'm putting you down for a "greatest battle."

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Re: Think you are strong, brave; an indestructible marshmallow making machine?
« Reply #20 on: September 01, 2012, 09:59:18 am »
0

EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. ITS CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, RIDDICK. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME NECROS. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ESCAPED THE GALAXYS MOST DANGEROUS PRISON. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUT LOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY HIGHSCHOOL AND ALL THEY CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JERKS. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNING.


First the OP, now this. This is  one weird ass, if not hilarious read.
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Offline mandible/splinteryourjaw

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Re: Think you are strong, brave; an indestructible marshmallow making machine?
« Reply #21 on: September 01, 2012, 06:33:33 pm »
+1
Next episode:  (More to the point, but sacrificing the entertaining story...nobody cares anyway right  :wink:  )

A fight looked imminent due to Grandma Rectalharm's refusal to return the severed appendage. Much hateful verbal battering took place as tempers flared on both sides. The nomads charged the only bridge into the village. Grandma Rectalharm set up a formidable fist wall along the edge of the bridge. Mandible charged the fist wall and then broke to the side in an effort to attack the peasants from the back. There was no strategy on his part, just stupidity; for he wanted to use his backhand.

The peasants misinterpreted this move as an attempt to rush Rouncey in her stall. The fist wall broke to pursue Mandible just as Turboflex crashed into it, leaving many a peasant unconscious. Turboflex was quickly followed by Dino, Anders, Rhalzo, and Spainard as the peasants were beat into an uncoordinated mob.

Charging out and then being forced to fall back to the bridge, the peasants once again formed a fist wall. Turboflex again crashed into this fist wall. Unbeknownst to him the fist wall was a trap; a trap which quickly turned into a kick circle, a very devastating kick circle of death.

As the battle raged many a peasant fell to the nomads, but not nearly enough.  Soon the Nomads were forced to retreat.  With the crunching sound of many broken teeth under their boots, the peasants quickly reclaimed the unconscious bodies of 112 of their neighbors. The nomads attempted to reclaim their 36 fallen brethren, but were repulsed.  Rhalzo not hearing the call to retreat was left alone and quickly engulfed within a newly formed kick circle of death.

The nomads reluctantly returned to their encampment to consult their mage, Froyoyoyoyoyo the wizard.  Froyoyoyoyoyo prepared a recipe to create a magical weapon. A weapon that when used would provide a screen to enable the nomads to recover their unconscious fallen.

And so the battle continues;

Nomads
Have Nomad Armor, Nomad Boots, Practice Daggers, Wooden Sticks (kind of rare; to simulate being found on the ground,) Stones (plentiful because battle is on a riverbank,) and smoke bombs.

Peasants
Have assorted peasant clothes, peasant knives, throwing knives (kitchen ware,) wooden sticks, stones, and a couple cleavers.

previous battles results were 6 nomads vs 11 peasants, w/Dino knocking out 38 peasants himself.......36 nomads were lost and 112 peasants beat down.