Author Topic: FML  (Read 4472 times)

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Offline FRANK_THE_TANK

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Re: FML
« Reply #90 on: March 31, 2014, 12:24:44 am »
+2
Also, for those that happen to be single (or don't care), get the Tinder app, it's the best thing since sliced bread.

Can confirm.

If you are not bad looking and fit with an ability to converse this thing is ridiculous.

It's ridiculous to the point of becoming sole crushing. So nongingers need not apply, huzzah for being a ginger.

----

2 things

1 if a girl takes you to her bedroom that usually means she wants to get down. So do, and expect nothing more. Don't be a needy princess about it.

2 the Japanese are super hard to read when it comes to this stuff. I went on high school exchange there and it was hell confusing until I gave up talking to the nice girls and just hung out with the rough smoking, spitting hitting crazy chicks that reminded me of home. They were far easier... To understand.

Anyway, sweat it not bro.

Never spend 200$ on dinner with a girl. Spend nothing then no one feels like anyone owes anyone. If the women wants you to spend 200$ flip her the bird, tell her it be the word and walk because fuck that noise.

You've got to be honest with yourself as well and figure out what you need. I've no idea what that is but usually it's not a girlfriend but people constantly try and get into a relationship, tis cray cray of the highest order.
Fammi un pompino!

I think I have ball cancer in my right nut :(
Good news everybody! It's not nut cancer :)
Bad news everybody, I got dumped :(

Offline Clockworkkiller

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Re: FML
« Reply #91 on: March 31, 2014, 03:13:24 am »
+1
frank can u right a book on dating and sex then give it to me?
You are a horrible human being clockwork.

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Offline FRANK_THE_TANK

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Re: FML
« Reply #92 on: March 31, 2014, 04:21:47 am »
+11
frank can u right a book on dating and sex then give it to me?

Yes

----

Chapter 1 don't do what Frank does. Use a fucking condom.

Chapter 2 It's all about the basics. Clean your self regularly, work out, wear okay slightly fashionable clothing, learn to talk good like because wit and charm will get you everywhere... often, and vigorously.

Chapter 3 Dealing with unwanted pregnancy

Chapter 4 so you've got the clap

Chapter 5 Yep, that's incurable.

Chapter 6 So, you realize you can no longer feel love

Chapter 7 There is no conceivable way you'll ever really be able to remember how many PEOPLE you've slept with... Yep, you think at least one of them was a dude.

Chapter 8 So you're getting older, looks like it's all over. Oh wait, what's that in the distance. Ah thank god, it's all the girls with daddy issues.

Chapter 9 Money can easily buy blow jobs. But why pay when they are free and plentiful.

Chapter 10 Back to the back packers

Chapter 11 Oh god, that really is incurable.

Chapter 12 Thank fuck they found a cure.

Chapter 13 Syphilis really does rot your brain.


----

Schizo strikes again.
Fammi un pompino!

I think I have ball cancer in my right nut :(
Good news everybody! It's not nut cancer :)
Bad news everybody, I got dumped :(

Offline Nightmare798

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Re: FML
« Reply #93 on: April 01, 2014, 01:58:57 pm »
+1
Yes

----

Chapter 1 don't do what Frank does. Use a fucking condom.

Chapter 2 It's all about the basics. Clean your self regularly, work out, wear okay slightly fashionable clothing, learn to talk good like because wit and charm will get you everywhere... often, and vigorously.

Chapter 3 Dealing with unwanted pregnancy

Chapter 4 so you've got the clap

Chapter 5 Yep, that's incurable.

Chapter 6 So, you realize you can no longer feel love

Chapter 7 There is no conceivable way you'll ever really be able to remember how many PEOPLE you've slept with... Yep, you think at least one of them was a dude.

Chapter 8 So you're getting older, looks like it's all over. Oh wait, what's that in the distance. Ah thank god, it's all the girls with daddy issues.

Chapter 9 Money can easily buy blow jobs. But why pay when they are free and plentiful.

Chapter 10 Back to the back packers

Chapter 11 Oh god, that really is incurable.

Chapter 12 Thank fuck they found a cure.

Chapter 13 Syphilis really does rot your brain.


----

Schizo strikes again.

I can swear that while reading this, I could hear star wars soundtrack playing in the background.
Tseng: Used to the bitter taste of refusal, this only serves to reinforce his greatest life lession yet.
Cloud: And that is?
Tseng: Bitches, man.

Offline Overdriven

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Re: FML
« Reply #94 on: April 01, 2014, 02:30:57 pm »
+3
relationships really are more trouble than they're worth.

With you Xant I'm sure they are.

Offline Xant

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Re: FML
« Reply #95 on: April 01, 2014, 02:50:00 pm »
+1
Yes, very astute. That's what I said.
Meaning lies as much
in the mind of the reader
as in the Haiku.