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Strategus => Diplomacy => Topic started by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 02:34:32 am

Title: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 02:34:32 am
From the keep of Nova Grunwalder castle, Adoptagoat, Lord of TKoV, Conqueror of Khudan, Most Illustrious Wielder of the Lawlpike, Rider of Goats, Crutcher of Levels, Administrator of the Law and Uncle to The Kingdom of Veluca,- Acting Steward to the Kingdom of Veluca and Velucan Empire could see the vast expanses of the former Velucan Empire in all 4 directions.  To his east, the crownlands, held by The Kingdom proper.  Sworn to support the Lord Emperor God King Robert, the Goat's own nephew.   The crownlands remained loyal to their liege.  When the grizzled lord closed his eyes, he could see the royal purple banners flying over the Kingdom's fiefs, the warm welcomes he had received from the lords and captains that the old campaigner had visited in years past.

To the South and West, he could see the great mountain holdfasts of the Empire's former vassals, remaining in open rebellion to their rightful Emperor's rule.  The once loyal Hounds were scattered, the castles and fiefs they held in trust for the God Emperor were either sold off for personal gain or abandoned to foreign barbarians or encroaching neighboring Kingdoms, some which had previously declared friendship and had bled, side by side with the old Lord, much to the his chagrin "We helped them before, and in our moment of weakness, they seized upon our lands", the Lord seethed .  The acting Steward of Veluca shook his head, "for what?" he asked the wind, "So Bonesaw could wear a crown for a week?"  It was somehow worse, back in the keep, where he could see upon the map the few lonely strongholds in the desert that Les Chevalier Occitan had remaining when the empire had shattered, mere weeks away from LCO capitulation

To the north was where the Lord most dreaded to gaze.  He saw the frontiers of the renowned Murder Boners.  The MBs stood in active opposition to their former Leader's decrees.  They remained in opposition to their former Lords and refused to relinquish the lands granted to them by the charter of the Velucan Empire, despite having abandoned the most illustrious Empire in the North American Fiefdoms.  He could envision the MB Lieutenants and Sergeants, who were among his oldest companions, who the Lord had trusted and fought beside personally, regardless of Empire diplomacy-even before their oaths of fealty to the Empire, who were in open arms against their former allies and benefactors.  What hurt most was the knowledge that one of his oldest comrades had defected to take up arms and command against his own nation.

Adoptagoat fingered the letters which his scribes had prepared.  The contents were nonsense to the layman, the foreign dignitary, or even to the loyal Lords of the Kingdom of Veluca.  Only the shadowy operatives of the Goat Faction, to whom the Lord of Veluca had sent private feelers out in the Empire's days of prosperity, members of the Kingdom whose experience with the old Lord had made their fealty to the revered Goat first and foremost before their loyalty to the God Emperor.  These operatives had continued to serve the Goat in his service to his Leader, and would have been able to decipher the code embedded in the nonsense missives.  Adoptagoat seethed at the insults to the Empire, and to the very structure which had made the most feared faction in the North American Fiefdoms a mean and, while not insignificant, not a major piece of the greater war which was brewing in the lands of Calradia.

The De Facto Steward sighed, and looked away from his borders.  His eyes wandered to the yard within the castle.  He saw the bustle of training, recruitment and trade which had always revolved around the stone castle, as long as the Kingdom had controlled it.  But what he missed was more important to the Lord.  He could not see the former military leader of the Kingdoms.  He presumed Hobb remained in his chambers in Ergellon, enthralled by the harpy in whose talons the Goat had last seen him, the very one which had led the former leader from the Imperial military Capital to the border stronghold.  Adoptagoat could picture the ring which he had seen, right before leaving the outpost, upon the former leader's finger, which had left Hobb within the harpy's thrall.  He could also picture his liege-lord's drunken orgies, within the walls of the capital proper, the invitation to which had always made his stays in the Imperial City brief.  But lastly, the grizzled Lord could see the hoof-prints, which led the proper Steward of Veluca away.  His return was assured to the old Veteran, the weight of command,  which he used to bear so easily,  would be lifted from his shoulders, in time.  The Old Lord was torn.  "Is this the time?" He asked the air.  "Was this what the Goat Faction has worked towards?"  The acting ruler summoned his messengers, but while waiting for his most loyal squires, the seasoned veteran paused,  The missives remained in his grasp.  He quickly thrust them in the beacon fire upon the rampart.  When his squires arrived, he told them to bring food, but first, ale.  "not yet," the old man mused to himself, "not yet."
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 02:52:29 am
TL:DR- Read it or GTFO you spergs.

Edit: Fuck it, here you go: HoC sold lands they had no real right to(were given lands which we had equally fought for because they were TVE), and outside kingdoms broke truces(SS) and friendships(Frisia, Raven, by extension) to pick them up, and paid outlandish sums of which we(TkoV)have seen nothing.  Chaos is the only faction which acquired land through our fall which did not break an explicit or implied agreement(but at the same time, acquired Velucan lands for nothing, as far as TKoV is concerned) .  MB has resisted every excessively diplomatic suggestion by us, including equal fief power relocation, after having only received those fiefs after accepting vassalage.  Also, they dropped faction and attacked us within a day.

You are all very lucky I don't still lead the faction, As TKoV is still stronger than any faction that has betrayed us in the fall of TVE.  I am acting as the de-facto leader of the council and playing into their interests, rather my own.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Relit on August 02, 2013, 04:03:37 am
... and friendships(Frisia, Raven, by extension) to pick them up, and paid outlandish sums of which we(TkoV)have seen nothing.  Chaos is the only faction which acquired land through our fall which did not break an explicit or implied agreement(but at the same time, acquired Velucan lands for nothing, as far as TKoV is concerned).

You are all very lucky I don't still lead the faction, As TKoV is still stronger than any faction that has betrayed us in the fall of TVE.  I am acting as the de-facto leader of the council and playing into their interests, rather my own.

We had passage agreements to TKoV which Bonesaw violated, not us. You are aware that Bonesaw declared war on us, right? Everybody on the map knows he went crazy and wanted to go out with a bang but in doing that he caused the downfall of his faction.

Saying we betrayed yall is a bit much.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 04:11:42 am
We all know you're a bit touchy on the ehonour front, Relit.  But your Allies seem to have gained a bunch of land off of what was formerly TVE without a word to us.  Bonesaw being a drunken 'tard shouldn't have voided the respect between our factions, and still hasn't.  In my personal opinion, which this thread speaks of, you acquired de jure land from our empire without discussing it with us.  By the laws of CK2, sure, they were retarded rebelling vassals, but a reasonable diplomatic person would consider that before annexing a part of my Empire.

Edit: Honestly, were it up to me, your faction would make concessions before they continued to be run around being the ONLY faction allowed to trade our S&D.  We'll see what Tristran says when he's back in town.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Relit on August 02, 2013, 04:19:20 am
The Hounds declared independence and sat there for a long time, you lost your cores (eu3 style). So you really have no claim to that land anymore. Technically we are still allied with TKoV and a trading partner... That you took this long to express any issue with the recent events is strange. This is a settled issue as far as we are concerned.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Taser on August 02, 2013, 04:19:55 am
We had passage agreements to TKoV which Bonesaw violated, not us. You are aware that Bonesaw declared war on us, right? Everybody on the map knows he went crazy and wanted to go out with a bang but in doing that he caused the downfall of his faction.

Saying we betrayed yall is a bit much.

Goat's just pissed HoC wrecked a lot of plans the VE had along with taking a hefty portion of gold, manpower, and fiefs. Then the VE lost those fiefs to other factions because bonesaw gave up right after rebelling. Its what a lot of us felt after he went through all that trouble to fuck us over then quit.

Eh.

You're good people relit but the whole situation just leaves a bitter taste in our mouths.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 04:28:02 am
They did NOT sit there for a long time. Bonesaw took a week, MAX to go nuts.  As long as you're talking "technically" I know of no alliance between us, just friendly support between friends.  Of all factions, excepting fcc (strat 2 history) former Nh should know my love for their clan (rip diggles).  FFS you guys would stick with me in NA 1 when I was running off to suicide.  Which only makes it the worse when you take our fiefs without talking to me or my buds, when a former vassal goes nuts.  By all rights, you should've handed halmar and friends back to us, and you know what? With our friendship and limitations we probably would've talked to Frisia ourselves.  What's done is done.  You conquered Halmar instead of reclaiming it.

But honestly, I'm the interim leader, when trist gets back, he'll probably go right back to kissing your expedient ass.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Casimir on August 02, 2013, 04:46:49 am
It does seem a poor show when someone who you consider to be friendly seizes rebel fiefs off you and don't enter any form of discussion with you about it.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 04:50:05 am
Well, apparently, I was mistaken, and our clans are officially closer than is public. All the more reason for you not to take my retarded vassal's land  and give it to your retarded vassal(excepting sanders), thereby creating strife between us.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Jaren on August 02, 2013, 05:02:42 am
To my memory, it took less then a week for tVE to collapse. I left TKoV specifically for how poorly the entire situation was handled; albeit, multiple parties did associate in the complete and pathetic wimper of a noise, as one of the greater factions North American Fiefdoms divided for ridiculous reasons.

I did my campaigns with TKoV in Strat 3 & 4 and have good comrades still amongst them, still, it was pathetic on most all parts.

As for the land disputes... Much was lost that we all worked to gain. Such a waste to see it all go like that and waste tickets to internal disputes.
Nevertheless, it's interesting to see these new super factions form.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 05:06:35 am
To my memory, it took less then a week for tVE to collapse. I left TKoV specifically for how poorly the entire situation was handled albeit multiple parties did associate in the complete pathetic wimper of a noise as one of the greater factions North American Fiefdoms divided for ridiculous reasons.

Did my campaigns with TKoV in Strat 3 & 4 and have good comrades still amongst them, still, it was pathetic on most all parts.

As for the land disputes... Much was lost that we all worked to gain. Such a waste to see it all go like that and waste tickets to internal disputes.
Nevertheless, it's interesting to see these new super factions form.

Super Factions are only interesting if you lead one
Source: Led super faction

You too, Jaren, should be seeing windfalls from sales of velucan fiefs, more so than most.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Jaren on August 02, 2013, 05:20:00 am
Super Factions are only interesting if you lead one
Source: Led super faction
Shitty breakdown due to miscommunication and poor handling of leadership leading to a collapse of a super faction.
Source: VE
Ah... Too soon, my b.

Nah, I'm just out for the wanderlust of catapulting and xp.
All the good qualities in strat.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Artyem on August 02, 2013, 05:33:54 am
give it to your retarded vassal(excepting sanders)

Wait... what?  Who the hell is a vassal of the Ravens?  CHAOS?  Semen Storm?  The Aggregate Alliance?  Occitan?  Please clarify.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Turboflex on August 02, 2013, 05:47:50 am
Pretty sure I contacted and spoke briefly with either Hobb or Tristan (I think Hobb) when the whole HoC collapse thing happened. No objection was made about us fighting them or concerns about the fiefs' future ownership. Coordination on the attacks was also mentioned and he said TKoV might/probably make a move, but didn't hear from him again.

Kind of weird to bring this all up a month later, and in an emo-ish manner on the forums. Please message me here or on steam if you want to discuss further.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 02, 2013, 06:12:32 am

outside kingdoms broke truces(SS)


I guess I'll address this:

false.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 06:19:02 am
*cough, Saren.*  You attacked my neighboring vassal and handed it over to a chinese overlord.  Not much else to say about that.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 06:20:02 am
Wait... what?  Who the hell is a vassal of the Ravens?  CHAOS?  Semen Storm?  The Aggregate Alliance?  Occitan?  Please clarify.

Frisia.  Pretty clear if you look at past battles and past TVE fiefs.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 02, 2013, 06:26:17 am
*cough, Saren.*  You attacked my neighboring vassal and handed it over to a chinese overlord.  Not much else to say about that.

I was more or less pointing to where you implied we had an agreement of any kind, which was incorrect.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 06:38:08 am
I was more or less pointing to where you implied we had an agreement of any kind, which was incorrect.

Aparrently TKov and Occitan have a CF for several months, which involves SS, which I had to recently argue with other TKoVs about, attacking Saren was clearly against the agreement, and if we do attack Saren in the near future(we will) it will be on the same spirit in which the CF was agreed.  We wont attack you after or anything, but dont expect us to extend agreements to your CN vassals whom break our agreement repeatedly by taking our S&d.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 06:44:07 am
I was more or less pointing to where you implied we had an agreement of any kind, which was incorrect.
If you have any agreement with us, which you do, ask Occi.  You sold our fief to a CN faction which has repeatedly stolen our S&d.  Declare them as your vassals if you like, but they will not last in our proximity, even if you do.  They have broken our CF by taking our supply and demand.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 02, 2013, 06:49:43 am
Aparrently TKov and Occitan have a CF for several months, which involves SS, which I had to recently argue with other TKoVs about, attacking Saren was clearly against the agreement, and if we do attack Saren in the near future(we will) it will be on the same spirit in which the CF was agreed.  We wont attack you after or anything, but dont expect us to extend agreements to your CN vassals whom break our agreement repeatedly by taking our S&d.

Occitan and SS had a ceacefire with HOC for about a month, and they were attacked well after that period had ended. They were also attacked after your empire crumbled, so to claim that the fiefs HoC had were somehow your fiefs as some kind of casus belli is quite entertaining. The Velucan Empire was effectively destroyed, you could not control your vassals, you lost fiefs that were in your "empire" long before the were taken from your former vassals.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 06:57:49 am
The TKoV, Occi and SS Cf still applies, it still doesn't end for several months,  Would you like for me to ignore it and declare my personal declaration in support of FCC before tristran gets back?  Whatever way the cookie crumbles, tkov is independent (to YOUR advantage) and you assholes have broken it in attacking our vassals at our doorstep.  If and when we attack Saren, your involvement in the defense, should you insist, will be taken into account.  You have no place to be attacking our vassals, albeit rebelling, on our doorstep.  Much less to hand it over to CN's which will refuse our diplomacy and take our S&D without a word.  It is in fact strictly contrary to the treaty we have signed with your overlords.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: MURDERTRON on August 02, 2013, 07:01:32 am
Adoptagoat, quit crying and do something about it.  Or just attack FCC too... Whatever.

Also wasn't this post due like two months ago?
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 07:22:44 am
Adoptagoat, quit crying and do something about it.  Or just attack FCC too... Whatever.

Also wasn't this post due like two months ago?

Yes, this post was due a  month ago, but should that make it any less relevant?  TKoV remains a faction in strat and any affront to us remains an affront to us.   Personally, I am confused by any FCC involvement in our de jure war as it only serves to fight your LCO enemies  Were it my decision to make, TKOV would be straight up FCC Allies in the war to come, your opposition puzzles me.

Edit: Oh, I get it, let me know when fcc is sending us troops and gear.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 02, 2013, 07:27:23 am
The TKoV, Occi and SS Cf still applies, it still doesn't end for several months,  Would you like for me to ignore it and declare my personal declaration in support of FCC before tristran gets back?  Whatever way the cookie crumbles, tkov is independent (to YOUR advantage) and you assholes have broken it in attacking our vassals at our doorstep.  If and when we attack Saren, your involvement in the defense, should you insist, will be taken into account.  You have no place to be attacking our vassals, albeit rebelling, on our doorstep.  Much less to hand it over to CN's which will refuse our diplomacy and take our S&D without a word.  It is in fact strictly contrary to the treaty we have signed with your overlords.

Seems to me like a fallen giant throwing out half-assed threats. If you really mean to say that you have a claim to Saren because it belonged to HoC, then by extension you are laying claim to ex-HoC fiefs owned by CHAOS, Golden Apple Corps, and Frisia. I have no problem remaining at peace with TKOV, but if talk like this continues there is no reason to leave you all in your corner of the world if you're only going to stab us in the back.

EDIT: I realize that none of what Adoptagoat says here really reflects the actual TKOV leadership, so take all this with a grain of salt.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Sandersson Jankins on August 02, 2013, 07:34:13 am
Well, apparently, I was mistaken, and our clans are officially closer than is public. All the more reason for you not to take my retarded vassal's land  and give it to your retarded vassal(excepting sanders), thereby creating strife between us.

I am honored to be named as the only mentally competent vassal, but mildly perturbed to be considered a vassal of Raven (unless I am misunderstanding you; very possible).

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: MURDERTRON on August 02, 2013, 07:50:54 am
Yes, this post was due a  month ago, but should that make it any less relevant?  TKoV remains a faction in strat and any affront to us remains an affront to us.   Personally, I am confused by any FCC involvement in our de jure war as it only serves to fight your LCO enemies  Were it my decision to make, TKOV would be straight up FCC Allies in the war to come, your opposition puzzles me.

Edit: Oh, I get it, let me know when fcc is sending us troops and gear.

What I'm saying is I prefer action to forum posts.  Oh, and exp too.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 08:03:23 am
I am honored to be named as the only mentally competent vassal, but mildly perturbed to be considered a vassal of Raven (unless I am misunderstanding you; very possible).

(click to show/hide)

For ME, if you're arrowaine's vassals, after all we and FCC have done for you, that makes it straightforward.  I sincerely hope your post is ironic, but I fear it is true.   Sanders, ALL of the fiefs you used to own were seized or sold by my vassals.  Make your choice smartly.    If you choose occitan overlordship, it is what it is.  I sincerely implore you to reconsider.  You are on the border of a great war, LCO is not the NA  choice.  At the worst, independece until the last remains to you, but attacking FCC in accordance with LCO wishes would make you a tool.  Remember the where you have come from, LCO had NO PART.

Edit: you are Raven vassals to the extent you allow yourselves to be
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 08:35:40 am
EDIT: I realize that none of what Adoptagoat says here really reflects the actual TKOV leadership, so take all this with a grain of salt.
[/quote]

True, for the time being.  However, you are unaware how TKoV leadership works and I hold a certain clout therein.    At the time being I AM TKoV leadership.  I can assure you that your CN vassals should retreat from my fief or lose their forces, En total.  The Idea that a village would remain on our doorstep to continually flout our lordship and take our S&D is ridiculous,  Saren will become TVE within the week, LCO has yet to declare protectorship, and doing so would void our NAP
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Sandersson Jankins on August 02, 2013, 09:14:25 am
For ME, if you're arrowaine's vassals, after all we and FCC have done for you, that makes it straightforward.  I sincerely hope your post is ironic, but I fear it is true.   Sanders, ALL of the fiefs you used to own were seized or sold by my vassals.  Make your choice smartly.    If you choose occitan overlordship, it is what it is.  I sincerely implore you to reconsider.  You are on the border of a great war, LCO is not the NA  choice.  At the worst, independece until the last remains to you, but attacking FCC in accordance with LCO wishes would make you a tool.  Remember the where you have come from, LCO had NO PART.

Edit: you are Raven vassals to the extent you allow yourselves to be

Yes, I was being silly and facetious. Pretty much everything I put in spoilers is meant to be taken as a joke. We do not make decisions at anyone's behest. If a decision is made that happens to be in accordance with another's, it is by coincidence. However, to avoid communication and cooperation with someone who is an enemy of your enemy would be foolish. It has been made clear that we are determined to make war upon FCC. If LCO were to abandon that front and whole-heartedly attack someone else, we would continue to fight FCC. We'll fight them until something drastically changes or we no longer have the ability or zeal to do so.

I also recognize that we have received our core fiefs from others, namely you and FCC. However, I feel that we have paid that debt by cooperating heavily through mercenary support, logistic and military support (in FCC's case) and intel on Occitan troop movements (in TkoV's case). I do not see the problem with the seizing of Elherdah and Yalibe. We would not have touched them if Bonesaw (who represented HoC, regardless of whether his decisions were sound) had not declared war upon us and Ravens without significant provocation. We felt that the seizure of a couple HoC fiefs were justified. I do understand that Bonesaw made a rash and foolish decision (according to him it would likely be perfectly fine since he was quitting strategus altogether), but to me, that does not justify the unconditional return of former VE fiefs when they were held by HoC at the time.

If you have anything to discuss, I would recommend that you contact me directly! Ravens are close friends of ours, it is no secret. However, they do not call our shots and they do not represent us. Perhaps that was not the case when Fimbulvetr was an entity, but those days are over. We are likely to support Ravens as they are likely to support us; but we are not firmly obligated to do so, at least not as I see it.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Matey on August 02, 2013, 09:43:27 am
I luvs u goat. I look forward to TKoV getting more active in strat.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Haramir on August 02, 2013, 02:56:41 pm
For ME, if you're arrowaine's vassals, after all we and FCC have done for you, that makes it straightforward.  I sincerely hope your post is ironic, but I fear it is true.   Sanders, ALL of the fiefs you used to own were seized or sold by my vassals.  Make your choice smartly.    If you choose occitan overlordship, it is what it is.  I sincerely implore you to reconsider.  You are on the border of a great war, LCO is not the NA  choice.  At the worst, independece until the last remains to you, but attacking FCC in accordance with LCO wishes would make you a tool.  Remember the where you have come from, LCO had NO PART.

Edit: you are Raven vassals to the extent you allow yourselves to be

Maybe this will be hard for you to understand Adoptagoat, but not everyone on the NA map is a vassal of some bigger faction. The only faction who did something like this was TVE and its quite funny to see you claiming over ( You vassals fief) when in fact im quite sure you were just 3 clan allying together and making someting big as a team.  Its just a damn game and every clan i see working together are just doing it for fun and because they like the clan member of the other clan.  Just like FCC do with all the clan they work with or absord in their faction. 

As of LCO, it is only composed of Occitan and Chevalier and no one else except the Mates for the time being for coordination fighting FCC and Frisia have their own war with FCC too. 
LCO only ally is SS

LCO never had any vassal and never will



Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Turboflex on August 02, 2013, 03:39:36 pm
On a side note it's kind of funny how 'vassal' has become such a dirty word in this game.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 02, 2013, 05:22:58 pm
Good lord, someone clearly got into my forum account AND my whiskey last night.

Taser has the right of it, just a little venting and sharing the way it went down from my perspective.

Much love to my old friends from NH, Frisia, MB, Chaos and HOC.  Don't take it personal.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Philosiraptor on August 02, 2013, 08:04:38 pm
leleleleleleleleleleleleleleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelelelelelelelel
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on August 02, 2013, 08:37:28 pm
Good ol' devil whiskey :D

I thought it was interesting discussions, I was enjoying it while eating my popcorn. 

Pretty sure Hobb started his cat fertility clinic he's been talking about, and has been busy jerking off cats for the last month or so. 
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: dynamike on August 02, 2013, 10:30:33 pm
leleleleleleleleleleleleleleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelelelelelelelel

ohai!
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Hobb on August 02, 2013, 10:58:14 pm
its been too long since ive seen drunk goat in action, that's vintage stuff. we are in a very intense war with MB at the moment. every week, aldog lets 10k or so of his uxxal troops die from upkeep. so in a few months we will be ready to strike!!!!

THEN were gonna pork those dirty asians squatting on our lawn.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Jaren on August 02, 2013, 11:49:22 pm
Good lord, someone clearly got into my forum account AND my whiskey last night.

Taser has the right of it, just a little venting and sharing the way it went down from my perspective.

Much love to my old friends from NH, Frisia, MB, Chaos and HOC.  Don't take it personal.
Drunk Goat best Goat
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Malaclypse on August 02, 2013, 11:54:15 pm
looks like he really got some people's goat FUCKAHAHAHAHA
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Kalam on August 03, 2013, 01:19:37 am
From the keep of Nova Grunwalder castle, Adoptagoat, Lord of TKoV, Conqueror of Khudan, Most Illustrious Wielder of the Lawlpike, Rider of Goats, Crutcher of Levels, Administrator of the Law and Uncle to The Kingdom of Veluca,- Acting Steward to the Kingdom of Veluca and Velucan Empire could see the vast expanses of the former Velucan Empire in all 4 directions.  To his east, the crownlands, held by The Kingdom proper.  Sworn to support the Lord Emperor God King Robert, the Goat's own nephew.   The crownlands remained loyal to their liege.  When the grizzled lord closed his eyes, he could see the royal purple banners flying over the Kingdom's fiefs, the warm welcomes he had received from the lords and captains that the old campaigner had visited in years past.

To the South and West, he could see the great mountain holdfasts of the Empire's former vassals, remaining in open rebellion to their rightful Emperor's rule.  The once loyal Hounds were scattered, the castles and fiefs they held in trust for the God Emperor were either sold off for personal gain or abandoned to foreign barbarians or encroaching neighboring Kingdoms, some which had previously declared friendship and had bled, side by side with the old Lord, much to the his chagrin "We helped them before, and in our moment of weakness, they seized upon our lands", the Lord seethed .  The acting Steward of Veluca shook his head, "for what?" he asked the wind, "So Bonesaw could wear a crown for a week?"  It was somehow worse, back in the keep, where he could see upon the map the few lonely strongholds in the desert that Les Chevalier Occitan had remaining when the empire had shattered, mere weeks away from LCO capitulation

To the north was where the Lord most dreaded to gaze.  He saw the frontiers of the renowned Murder Boners.  The MBs stood in active opposition to their former Leader's decrees.  They remained in opposition to their former Lords and refused to relinquish the lands granted to them by the charter of the Velucan Empire, despite having abandoned the most illustrious Empire in the North American Fiefdoms.  He could envision the MB Lieutenants and Sergeants, who were among his oldest companions, who the Lord had trusted and fought beside personally, regardless of Empire diplomacy-even before their oaths of fealty to the Empire, who were in open arms against their former allies and benefactors.  What hurt most was the knowledge that one of his oldest comrades had defected to take up arms and command against his own nation.

Adoptagoat fingered the letters which his scribes had prepared.  The contents were nonsense to the layman, the foreign dignitary, or even to the loyal Lords of the Kingdom of Veluca.  Only the shadowy operatives of the Goat Faction, to whom the Lord of Veluca had sent private feelers out in the Empire's days of prosperity, members of the Kingdom whose experience with the old Lord had made their fealty to the revered Goat first and foremost before their loyalty to the God Emperor.  These operatives had continued to serve the Goat in his service to his Leader, and would have been able to decipher the code embedded in the nonsense missives.  Adoptagoat seethed at the insults to the Empire, and to the very structure which had made the most feared faction in the North American Fiefdoms a mean and, while not insignificant, not a major piece of the greater war which was brewing in the lands of Calradia.

The De Facto Steward sighed, and looked away from his borders.  His eyes wandered to the yard within the castle.  He saw the bustle of training, recruitment and trade which had always revolved around the stone castle, as long as the Kingdom had controlled it.  But what he missed was more important to the Lord.  He could not see the former military leader of the Kingdoms.  He presumed Hobb remained in his chambers in Ergellon, enthralled by the harpy in whose talons the Goat had last seen him, the very one which had led the former leader from the Imperial military Capital to the border stronghold.  Adoptagoat could picture the ring which he had seen, right before leaving the outpost, upon the former leader's finger, which had left Hobb within the harpy's thrall.  He could also picture his liege-lord's drunken orgies, within the walls of the capital proper, the invitation to which had always made his stays in the Imperial City brief.  But lastly, the grizzled Lord could see the hoof-prints, which led the proper Steward of Veluca away.  His return was assured to the old Veteran, the weight of command,  which he used to bear so easily,  would be lifted from his shoulders, in time.  The Old Lord was torn.  "Is this the time?" He asked the air.  "Was this what the Goat Faction has worked towards?"  The acting ruler summoned his messengers, but while waiting for his most loyal squires, the seasoned veteran paused,  The missives remained in his grasp.  He quickly thrust them in the beacon fire upon the rampart.  When his squires arrived, he told them to bring food, but first, ale.  "not yet," the old man mused to himself, "not yet."

"Sacrifices, ribald songs, sexual promiscuity, bestiality, brothels, forced prostitution- these are the reasons Veluca will fall." The righteous air with which Snickers declared this seemed final. He knew it was true. After all, drugs are bad, and what is dopamine but another drug?

"Yes. We don't believe in the Templar God- or any god, religion is stupid, but you know that masturbation is bad," added BlondeKhan, his lower lip quivering with authority. After all, had they not read about sublimation and all the things one could accomplish through the discipline of not fapping?

Kalam looked up from the game of chess he was pretending to play with himself. Really, he was just arranging the pieces to look like a hazelnut, because chess is boring.  "Uh," came the eloquent reply. A moment was taken to swallow the build up of saliva in his mouth at the thought of orgies with nutella. "What about feminist debauchery!" That was legit, right? "Don't be silly. It's not all the banging. It's that there's not enough banging. Diggles wasn't there to make love to Robert, and the Hounds were too busy hunting harmless armadillos in this thing they call 'siege' to make love to anyone. Man, it's simple psychology, really."

"No sex equals no love, and no love equals no Empire."

After all.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 03, 2013, 01:26:42 am
That is the weirdest most tangential RP i've ever read, but that isn't really saying much.

@Haramir.  Sure.  These fellows ain't your vassals, but you're the primary attacker in the server war, in which they fight by your side.  Also, I only use the word *expletive deleted* after Sanders did, albeit ironically.  I know that is not the case.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 03, 2013, 01:28:35 am
Moved to diplomacy? can we not,  :?.  A goat's ranting shouldn't be center stage.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Canary on August 03, 2013, 02:06:59 am
Good lord, someone clearly got into my forum account AND my whiskey last night.

Taser has the right of it, just a little venting and sharing the way it went down from my perspective.

Much love to my old friends from NH, Frisia, MB, Chaos and HOC.  Don't take it personal.

Get yer filthy elegant poleaxe convertin' hide on outta here, you long awlpike traitor, you.

(click to show/hide)


Hopefully those fiefs Chaos has that were HoC's isn't a bother to TKoV. I find it cool when the map can shift so dramatically, but of course this time it's to my benefit.

Try not to take the rest of them having taken some too personally, they did still have to fight for what they got! I'm not familiar with the exact nature of your agreements or deals you've made, but it seems like the HoC thing rubbed all of you, a whole group of friendly people, the wrong way. Maybe look at their side: you guys seemingly let such a potentially volatile faction manage itself unhindered to the point where it exploded and created a real problem for them, as well as you. Even if they don't treat taking the territories as recompense for that, anger at them over it seems to be misplaced; it was a situation where expenditure and action had to be taken to deal with a problem that was coming from your end, even though it may not have been your fault, and they were the ones who acted to deal with it.


Mine friend driveth his carriage I hath bequeathed to him over yonder cliff, sullying the good crop of horse-oats mine neighbour groweth in the valley below. The carriage remains whole, and he doth make use of it, after a minor repair at his cost, to resow the damaged fields. Would it not be folly to ask of him its return? It is not through direct misdeed I have tarnished his livelihood, though mine fault is still had in trusting an oaf.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 03, 2013, 02:17:03 am
What I didn't mention was WHY TVE split up.  It's a long story for another night, but honestly shouldn't be for public consumption.  TL:DR- HOC and MB hated each other, and Hobb went away for a week.

PS yep, that battle was the best.  period.

Edit: PPS- Canary's RP is the best RP
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Taser on August 03, 2013, 03:23:39 am
Good lord, someone clearly got into my forum account AND my whiskey last night.

Taser has the right of it, just a little venting and sharing the way it went down from my perspective.

Much love to my old friends from NH, Frisia, MB, Chaos and HOC.  Don't take it personal.

I knew it. I was going to ask if you were drunk but decided not to.

Also..

Quote
Taser has the right of it

Quote
Taser has the right of it

Quote
Taser has the right of it

Quote
Taser has the right of it

visitors can't see pics , please register or login
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: BoneSaw on August 06, 2013, 07:17:19 am
We all know you're a bit touchy on the ehonour front, Relit.  But your Allies seem to have gained a bunch of land off of what was formerly TVE without a word to us.  Bonesaw being a drunken 'tard shouldn't have voided the respect between our factions, and still hasn't.  In my personal opinion, which this thread speaks of, you acquired de jure land from our empire without discussing it with us.  By the laws of CK2, sure, they were retarded rebelling vassals, but a reasonable diplomatic person would consider that before annexing a part of my Empire.

Edit: Honestly, were it up to me, your faction would make concessions before they continued to be run around being the ONLY faction allowed to trade our S&D.  We'll see what Tristran says when he's back in town.
Give it up nerd, mod's dead.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Adoptagoat on August 06, 2013, 04:13:53 pm
Give it up nerd, mod's dead.

Don't you have a wine cooler you should be crying into?
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HarryCrumb on August 06, 2013, 04:59:51 pm
sandy and all of frisia are all fkn vassels to cup clan, get ur facts m8.

#cupclanbestclan
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: cup457 on August 06, 2013, 05:03:50 pm
sandy and all of frisia are all fkn vassels to cup clan, get ur facts m8.

#cupclanbestclan
Ever since Cup Clan took over Raven, I have secretly been spreading my power and soon Cup Clan will be the strongest shadow faction in all of strategus
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Aderyn on August 06, 2013, 05:09:53 pm
Ever since Cup Clan took over Raven, I have secretly been spreading my power and soon Cup Clan will be the strongest shadow faction in all of strategus

By anouncing the cup clan it is no longer a shadow faction. I'm sorry but your goal for glory has failed.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: cup457 on August 06, 2013, 05:26:31 pm
By anouncing the cup clan it is no longer a shadow faction. I'm sorry but your goal for glory has failed.
I only announced it because it is too late to stop me! HaHa! Now that I have Nova Amere to produce an umlimited amount of cups and nord nobleman outfits I am unstoppable
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING on August 06, 2013, 07:52:57 pm
The TKoV, Occi and SS Cf still applies, it still doesn't end for several months,  Would you like for me to ignore it and declare my personal declaration in support of FCC before tristran gets back?  Whatever way the cookie crumbles, tkov is independent (to YOUR advantage) and you assholes have broken it in attacking our vassals at our doorstep.  If and when we attack Saren, your involvement in the defense, should you insist, will be taken into account.  You have no place to be attacking our vassals, albeit rebelling, on our doorstep.  Much less to hand it over to CN's which will refuse our diplomacy and take our S&D without a word.  It is in fact strictly contrary to the treaty we have signed with your overlords.
As HoC was your vassal, TKoV should have been leading the attack on them (HoC) when HoC decided to attack another clan that you were friendly with. Instead you idled by in your inactive empire and just let it go on. Now you're suddenly surprised a month after the fact, that Raven's allies stepped in to lend them a hand in the destruction of HoC? I don't see how attacking Saren violated whatever deal you thought you had with SS. It was pretty clear to all of NA that HoC was no longer following your lead but doing their own thing. I wouldn't even consider them you're vassals anymore. You pretty much said it yourself, Bonesaw wasn't listening to you. Like I said, you should have been the first one to attack HoC when they rebelled. Oh, and I don't even think we sold Saren to Blood, as soon as we saw what a shitty fief it was, we just gave it to them fo free. We had no interest in taking fiefs, only wiping HoC for attacking our allies (and yours as well).

HoC's land stopped being a part of your empire the minute they decided to do their own thing.

EDIT: My bad, didn't bother reading past the first page until AFTER I posted this.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Keshian on August 06, 2013, 08:26:47 pm
As HoC was your vassal, TKoV should have been leading the attack on them (HoC) when HoC decided to attack another clan that you were friendly with. Instead you idled by in your inactive empire and just let it go on. Now you're suddenly surprised a month after the fact, that Raven's allies stepped in to lend them a hand in the destruction of HoC? I don't see how attacking Saren violated whatever deal you thought you had with SS. It was pretty clear to all of NA that HoC was no longer following your lead but doing their own thing. I wouldn't even consider them you're vassals anymore. You pretty much said it yourself, Bonesaw wasn't listening to you. Like I said, you should have been the first one to attack HoC when they rebelled. Oh, and I don't even think we sold Saren to Blood, as soon as we saw what a shitty fief it was, we just gave it to them fo free. We had no interest in taking fiefs, only wiping HoC for attacking our allies (and yours as well).

HoC's land stopped being a part of your empire the minute they decided to do their own thing.

EDIT: My bad, didn't bother reading past the first page until AFTER I posted this.

Wait what? Ravens and semenstorm are allies???  When did that happen?  I thought you guys hated each other.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Turboflex on August 06, 2013, 08:40:01 pm
I think he means Frisia helping Raven as allies, and then SS & Frisia are allied.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 06, 2013, 08:47:31 pm
I think he means Frisia helping Raven as allies, and then SS & Frisia are allied.

SS isn't a strategus entity anymore, it's been replaced by FUPA. And none of us hate any of you guys....
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING on August 06, 2013, 08:53:31 pm
SS isn't a strategus entity anymore, it's been replaced by FUPA. And none of us hate any of you guys....
Wrong, I hate EVERYONE, especially Pibb, who missed one of the most fun strat battles ever.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING on August 06, 2013, 08:54:21 pm
Wait what? Ravens and semenstorm are allies???  When did that happen?  I thought you guys hated each other.
We are on good terms, not allies, sorry, poor wording on my part, but I was also referring to LCO.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Matey on August 06, 2013, 09:38:47 pm
We are on good terms, not allies, sorry, poor wording on my part, but I was also referring to LCO.

Ravens are allied to LCO?
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Relit on August 06, 2013, 09:40:43 pm
Ravens are allied to LCO?

No. Raven is allies with Dracul and VE (specifically TKoV) only. There is a lot of confusion floating around in here lol
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on August 06, 2013, 09:56:42 pm
Everyone's allied to LCO, EU coming for you FCC baddies
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Haramir on August 06, 2013, 10:26:29 pm
Ravens are allied to LCO?

Raven are LCO vassals, just like everyone in NA
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Canuck on August 06, 2013, 10:32:30 pm
Can I be a vassal of someone? If you want to you can tell me what to do and instead of doing it I'll just keep afking in the fief
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on August 06, 2013, 10:45:29 pm
Can I be a vassal of someone? If you want to you can tell me what to do and instead of doing it I'll just keep afking in the fief

Silly Canuck, you're already an Hospitaller vassal...doesn't surprise me nobody bothered to tell you.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HeraldOfTheGOBBLINKING on August 07, 2013, 01:09:52 am
Ravens are allied to LCO?
I give up.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Matey on August 07, 2013, 02:32:31 am
I give up.

Ha! That'll teach you to not be ridiculously meticulous when posting!
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Jack1 on August 07, 2013, 03:09:02 am
Ravens are allied to LCO?

Well....

A Raven family member drank a little much one night and had a little fun with an FCC member, thus forcing them into marriage.

FCC stole some radishes from TAA's garden and came back with radish pie, they decided that the eating of the delish is radish pie would seal an alliance.

Raven is allied with dracul because, well, fuck raven.

Frisia declared war on various rodents in dracul lands, extinguished them, and now they owe Frisia big time.(to the point of an alliance)

Frisian members (sandy and cikel) polished arrowaine's cane many a time and now arrowaine has fallen in love and will not allow Frisia to fight alone.

Chevalier members won a desert-wide kickball tournament while making SS, FUPA, and Australis buddies alone the way.

Aldo had a murder boner that could only be hidden if jack sat on it. (Another loving relationship)

Tkov members decided they wanted to be friends with hospitaller and joined in one group hug of loving friendship and created life long bonds with each other through campfire s'mores and catching fish out of ponds.

The hospitaller corp. decided they wanted to invest in a condom factory and employed many chaos members.

Canary was very pleased that the rodents were done stealing his birdseed and would never finish thanking Frisia for it.

And FPF has been jerking off since the start.

So basically everybody is allied to everybody. So Occitan is allied to raven. And there should be no war. Because we're all allied. Except those apple people. Fuck those guys.
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: HarryCrumb on August 07, 2013, 06:01:20 am
Well....

A Raven family member drank a little much one night and had a little fun with an FCC member, thus forcing them into marriage.

FCC stole some radishes from TAA's garden and came back with radish pie, they decided that the eating of the delish is radish pie would seal an alliance.

Raven is allied with dracul because, well, fuck raven.

Frisia declared war on various rodents in dracul lands, extinguished them, and now they owe Frisia big time.(to the point of an alliance)

Frisian members (sandy and cikel) polished arrowaine's cane many a time and now arrowaine has fallen in love and will not allow Frisia to fight alone.

Chevalier members won a desert-wide kickball tournament while making SS, FUPA, and Australis buddies alone the way.

Aldo had a murder boner that could only be hidden if jack sat on it. (Another loving relationship)

Tkov members decided they wanted to be friends with hospitaller and joined in one group hug of loving friendship and created life long bonds with each other through campfire s'mores and catching fish out of ponds.

The hospitaller corp. decided they wanted to invest in a condom factory and employed many chaos members.

Canary was very pleased that the rodents were done stealing his birdseed and would never finish thanking Frisia for it.

And FPF has been jerking off since the start.

So basically everybody is allied to everybody. So Occitan is allied to raven. And there should be no war. Because we're all allied. Except those apple people. Fuck those guys.

tl;dr jack1 & frisia are gay
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Duster on August 07, 2013, 08:08:11 am
stuff

what does the 1 stand for in jack1

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(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: TheAppleSauceMan on August 07, 2013, 10:49:54 am
This thread is a perfect example of why I always try to refrain from posting (diplomatic posting at least) once drinking. Though at the same time, this had made for quite an interesting read....maybe I should reconsider that rule....
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Carac on August 08, 2013, 02:10:13 am
why does this exist
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Sparvico on August 08, 2013, 02:41:58 am
Can I be a vassal of someone? If you want to you can tell me what to do and instead of doing it I'll just keep afking in the fief

*cough cough*
Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Jack1 on August 08, 2013, 07:40:07 pm
why does this exist

same reason you exist. a night filled with alcohol finished by one big mistake.

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Title: Re: A Goat's thoughts upon the dissolution of an empire
Post by: Sir_Mahtin on August 08, 2013, 09:20:25 pm
I miss the Great War's xp...