Strategus => Diplomacy => Topic started by: Matey on August 05, 2012, 08:32:37 am
Title: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Matey on August 05, 2012, 08:32:37 am
Many months ago I took a great maul to the head and was in and out of consciousness. I would have brief moments of lucidity where I would find myself awaking in unfamiliar places, sometimes in snowy lands, or in the middle of the desert or other places. I had some dreams during my long periods of unconsciousness, the one I remember most vividly involved ninjas attacking a snowy village.
Finally I came to my senses for good and took stock of my situation; the glorious republic I had fought for was gone, the friendly peoples of the north were gone; my friends of Veluca were no longer a proud and mighty kingdom and were instead struggling to survive against the barbarian hordes who had invaded the north. The treacherous, honourless, cowardly barbarians of the steppes had spread their influence and brought death and poverty to the northern lands. Some folk talked about hordes of wacky speaking southern devils having pillaged their way through the north as well. Among this disaster there was also the familiar group of peace loving hippies who had taken to squatting around Reyvadin, even these peaceful folk had been forced into war as they sought to fight off the oncoming barbarians.
I was unsure what to do, there was no cause worth fighting for, so instead I chose to go back to my Pirate ways; first I decided to follow the vision I had seen and to gather up a squad of elite ninjas, I found some homeless people who wore black clothes that swore they were ninjas. They had no weapons that I could see but they assured me that they had mystical swords capable of slaying dragons; I was skeptical about these claims so I took my new comrades to the desert in the hopes of looting old battlefields for equipment. While in the desert I came across some drunk vikings who were forlornly trying to row their raiding boats across seas of sand. I quickly convinced these vikings that I could find them a good battle with good pillaging and a good death. And so, a band of unruly vikings and some homeless ninjas followed a Pirate to war against the vilest barbarians of Calradia.
tl;dr EAT PAIN
p.s. sign up for me.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Muki on August 05, 2012, 08:37:38 am
mmm so Pirates, Ninjas and Vikings team up together to vs the Hosp.... Seems Reasonable to me !
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Bobthehero on August 05, 2012, 09:12:55 am
No swashbucklers? Shamefur dispray.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Bjord on August 05, 2012, 09:13:56 am
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Havoco on August 06, 2012, 03:25:01 am
Hmm, pirates, vikings, and ninjas versus crusaders, romans, and star gazers. Sounds legit to me.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Matey on August 06, 2012, 05:12:38 am
Well, I had fun. Thanks to everyone who signed up for me, sorry to those who were around but didn't get a spot :cry:
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: BaleOhay on August 06, 2012, 05:49:27 pm
on vacation. finish the story matey! What happened? How did the homeless ninjas and vikings do?
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Matey on August 06, 2012, 09:08:38 pm
the nasty barbarian folk quickly and effectively reinforced their town, we were outnumbered 4:1 and facing well armed and well organized enemies, we ran up that hill and killed as many as we could but in the end, all the vikings and ninjas died and the Pirate tried to make a hurried exit with his gold only to be chased down by an angry Calradian with a french accent.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on August 06, 2012, 09:29:59 pm
You should keep all your gold, but not the goods/equipment.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Matey on August 06, 2012, 09:43:48 pm
yeah, Arowaine will never get my booty; no matter how bad he wants it!
i sold all my remaining gear in your village before I left too, so he can't have that either! :D
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on August 06, 2012, 09:47:27 pm
That was smart to do, too bad the village didn't have 100% tax set :P
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: HarunYahya on August 07, 2012, 01:05:57 am
Gangplank is mad .
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: King_Itchy on August 10, 2012, 06:16:43 am
Matey, Please remove your scurvy crew of misfits from my land of Ada Kulun. The putird odor that reeks from your camps is scaring what few good looking clean whores we had left in the territory, and causing them to flee to the snowy lands of the north. I know you're used to going months without knowing the touch of a women but us land dwellers are not anywhere near equipped enouogh mentally to suffer through such a drought. I will summon God's army to preserve the whoring harmony of my village if need be.
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: HardRice on August 10, 2012, 06:18:18 am
Matey, Please remove your scurvy crew of misfits from my land of Ada Kulun. The putird odor that reeks from your camps is scaring what few good looking clean whores we had left in the territory, and causing them to flee to the snowy lands of the north. I know you're used to going months without knowing the touch of a women but us land dwellers are not anywhere near equipped enouogh mentally to suffer through such a drought. I will summon God's army to preserve the whoring harmony of my village if need be.
All the woman went north anyway, to be with REAL men 8-)
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: Matey on August 10, 2012, 07:01:31 am
Matey, Please remove your scurvy crew of misfits from my land of Ada Kulun. The putird odor that reeks from your camps is scaring what few good looking clean whores we had left in the territory, and causing them to flee to the snowy lands of the north. I know you're used to going months without knowing the touch of a women but us land dwellers are not anywhere near equipped enouogh mentally to suffer through such a drought. I will summon God's army to preserve the whoring harmony of my village if need be.
YARRGGHHHH, PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!!
Title: Re: PREPARE TO BE BOARDED!!! YARRGGHHHH
Post by: HarunYahya on August 10, 2012, 07:12:54 am