For those who like a little RP, and would like to understand the religious beliefs of the 13 Knights a little better, I present these walls of text:
In which Bryggan and his squire Kev leave a chapel
"What was all that moaning and groaning during the service all about?" Kev asked Bryggan as they were leaving the chapel.
"Oh that was for the God. I used to hate all the kneeling they want us to do, but then I realized it was a test of strength. So now I show to that God that I am strong, that I am suffering a lot on the hard flagstones, but I still endure."
"What do mean by 'that God'. Isn't there only one god, Armagan the Creator, and his son chadz who gave us all life?"
"Pah!" Bryggan snorted. "There are many gods in this land, but they are all jealous of each other. Gods are like women. It is silly just to have one when you can have two, or three or even more. But like women, it is best if they don't know about each other. So, in the chapel I recite the chadz' prayer, but at other times I also face the east and pray like they taught me in the Seljuk lands. But you must not be drunk when you do that, and you must speak a foriegn language. I forgot the words they taught me, so I just say 'Lalala akkakka'. But the Seljuk god knows I am talking to him, so perhaps he will bless me. And the gods here don't speak that language, so they do not know I pray to him too."
"So you're hedging all your bets. Are you a christian too, then?"
"Yes, yes, I pray to baby Jesus. I pray, 'Baby Jesus, smite my enemies with pestilence and plague. Tear out their eyes with an iron hook. Give me their women to rape and their children to sell into slavery. Amen."
"Wow. Any other gods?"
"I do not worship the gods from my old land anymore, for they are too far away to help me. In this land there is one more, but we will not talk about it here. But as you are my squire, you should join in our next service. Tonight, at midnight, meet us at the standing stone in the oak grove."
In Which Bryggan and his Squire Kevin Walk Through the Woods
Twenty minutes before midnight, Kev was standing on the outside of the oak grove. Bryggan was waiting for him, dressed in a white robe. "Put this on", hissed Bryggan, handing him a similar robe. "We will talk as we walk".
Despite what he said, Bryggan was silent for the first five minutes. Finally he spoke. "Kev, do you know what the 13 Knights' motto is?"
"Certainly," Kev answered, "Sumus Mala Fortuna. We are bad luck."
"Yes. Bad luck is more powerful than good luck. It was bad luck for G-Force that they did not have an army near New Anus. It was bad luck for the caravan inside it that the owner was AFK. It was bad luck for ThurnissHaley that we spotted his unarmed caravan. And it was my bad luck that there were two Squid armies in the area when we were only ready for one. It is bad luck when you lose a battle because the servers are down. It is bad luck when only half your roster shows up. It is bad luck when you fall asleep before an important battle and can't add to the roster, or sleep through an alarm when you're supposed to reinforce a defending army."
"Well yeah," Kevin answered, "a lot of bad things do happen in Strat."
"Yes, a lot of bad things happen, and who causes the bad things? Who is responsible for all the misery and frustration in strat? I will tell you. It is the Nerfer. The Nerfer brought crime to Strat. The Nerfer brought poverty to Strat. The Nerfer lowered production and increased prices.
"Such power should not be ignored. People worship chadz, but the Nerfer has undone all His good works. So who is more powerful? Oh wait, we are here."
The two entered the grove, where more white robed people stood around the ancient standing stone. A brass pot on a tripod stood near the centre, and Bryggan dipped his fingers in it and made arcane marks on his face, then turned to Kev to make similar marks.
"What is it?" Kev asked.
"It is goat's blood," Bryggan answered, "It should be baby's blood, but King James would get very angry if he found out about it. He does not like the killing of babies, not even the ones from the poorest families."
In Which Bryggan and his Squire Kevin Attend the Midnight Service in the Oak Grove (Play this while reading:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqwV9l-U8ds )
Quietly they joined the circle of people around the standing stone. They stood in silence, even the nocturnal sounds of the forest seemed muted.
Finally a voice broke the silence. "Let us sing the Tydeus."
Some of the robed figures solemnly struck bells, then all the men present began to sing:
"Tydeus laudamus: Withal, we praise
te Dominum confitemur. you Tydeus.
Te aeternum Devi The eternal Dev
Omnia in Strat, propterea odit vos, In all Strat, you are hated,
Tibi omnes Lusori; All the players;
per cognationes suas et factio; their clans and factions;
Europae et Americae Septentrionalis, Europe and North America,
incessabili voce proclamant: unceasingly proclaim:
Spurcus, spurcus, spurcus, Nasty, nasty, nasty,
Dominus Deus Nerfi." Lord God of Nerfs.
Then a single voice rose out from the crowd.
"Oh fearsome and powerful Dev, oh great and mighty Tydeus, hear our prayer. Smite the Squids with your hateful nerfs, for they have gone against your Desires and trade and make money and build mighty armies, while we follow your ways and sit in fiefs waiting days for SD, or stay in badly placed fiefs and lose our armies to crime as is your Will.
"And nerf the despicable G-Force clan for posting spoilers. True, it caused misery which gives you Delight, but really, it didn't actually ruin the game for us as is your Will, it just pissed us off.
"And nerf EU... oh wait, never mind, they're already dead.
"And please withhold your nerfs from us, who follow in your ways, who are happy when we can afford mail shirts and two handed axes. Let us be an instrument in your destruction of Strat, for that is Thy Will, and let us make all players, clans and factions be as miserable as us. Amen."
Kev stood next to Bryggan trembling. "Now that is True Power," he whispered, awe in his voice.
