Topics

166

Sell/Trade / [Trade/Sell] MW Heavy Crossbow

« on: June 25, 2011, 05:31:50 pm »

State your offers.

167

Closed Requests / Clarification of the rules, please

« on: June 06, 2011, 02:11:18 pm »

As far as i know intentional team attacking at spawn is a banable offense. I only managed to take 1 clear screenshot but some other guys saw it and took a few more screens of this guy (BeeO) slashing my horse at the start of the round. His reason: a few teamkills of mine, by bumping. I say sorry for each of the teamkills i make but this guy decided to take justice into his own hands and punish my charger for it. Got lots of witnesses as well. If this continues next time i meet him i'll be forced to ask a ban for him and an essay of 500 words, on the subject of: "Why killing poor friendly horses that made a few friendly bumps is a bad thing to do".

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168

Closed Requests / [What to do with this guy]

« on: May 24, 2011, 10:41:37 pm »

.....our old friend Bogen Shutze, also known as Armbrust Shuetze.......my boys and I (and not only us) keep catching him randomly in his griefing, teamkilling, insulting, and all other kinds of sessions he tends to do but we are rarely quick enough to take a screenshot or two.....his latest "achievement": random poll abuse, out of the bright sky.....we didn't even communicate before this, he just decided to try out his luck and Fallen Punisher (much obliged again) kicked him......

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I was actively playing, with a score of 1:2, not bad for a level 14 who's strikes mostly bounce off of opponents....also i was actively typing so no chance i was afk or something.....

I would like to urge this community to do all of us a big favor: stay alert when you see this guy, he mostly does his shit instead of normal playing, catch him off guard (screen it) and get him permanently banned once and for all. If there is a scoreboard for bans so far im sure he is on top of it or very nearby.

169

Buy / [Buying] A few items

« on: May 24, 2011, 08:32:47 am »

If anyone has +1 or +2 Arab Guard Sword or Nordic Champion Sword or +1/+2 Elite Cavalry Shield, Plate Covered Round Shield or Steel Shield to sell for a reasonable amount of gold feel free to inform me. Skinners stay away from my purse or you'll lose your fingers.

170

Sell/Trade / [Trade/Sell] Few items

« on: May 23, 2011, 01:41:01 pm »

Ok scumbags, here is what i can offer:

1 loom point (I'm about to retire and if irejectable offer comes along....)


Listening to any offers via PM's.

171

Spam / Nomination for Admin aBooze: chadz

« on: February 24, 2011, 10:42:42 am »

Yes, that's right. chadz. You are aboozing us all by your choice of admins. Also  you are aboozing us by not giving your admins the posibility to kick/ban each other. For instance: Fasader should be able to ban Nuffen and Wookie permanently. 

172

Suggestions Corner / A few things that should be considered as a must-do for the next patch or so

« on: February 04, 2011, 11:18:14 am »

 - remove ladders from battle servers

    Why ? Cause battles look retarded these days, a bunch of roof-hugging monkeys climbing their beloved rooftops and then destroying the ladders so infantry that would otherwise     flank them and pick their brains out (what little of it they have) simply cant reach them, also often the same shitheads stand on the air-ladders (against all gravity and physics rules) and shoot people from there, i mean seriously what the hell ?

 - make all roofs unreachable (so you cant even jump on them without the ladders)

   Why ? Same shit as paragraph one, too many incompetent morons getting easy kills (on the infantry fighting below) from hardly reachable places, prolonging the rounds, making "battles" look retarded, etc.....

 - remove unbalanced maps and rework the spawn points on mostly all of 'em

 Too many of 'em, castles, villages on hills that you shouldn't be able to walk on without some alpinistic equipment, some where one team is spawned out in the open so they serve as practice dummies for the archers inside the village, etc

  - add some more open maps (like 50% villages and 50% plains or something) so we get different kinds of battles, not only archery tournaments.....as it is now - all of the maps are perfectly suited for ranged units and most of them are not suited for other classes.....more open maps = more sticking together = more teamwork = less bundle of stickss camping in some corners and sniping people from there

 - make running away and making someone run after you for a couple of minutes across the whole map a banable offence, i mean i really dont mind archers sacrifying their melee weapon for additional stack of arrows but dont fucking run away when we come to kill you, if its your turn to die then stand still and die like a man....taking advantage of your high athletics and making us run around like retards makes no sense whatsoever, if you wanna play like that then youre in the wrong place....some say its "tactic" but its bullshit, its prolonging the round same as youre the last man standing, one competent man can kill dozen of such my old friends but not if they keep running away....you waste our time that we could use to kill your teammates....backpedaling and taking cover to reload your xbow is one thing but running away like a spineless piece of shit without even trying to fight in melee is just.....crap.

173

Faction Halls / The Bandits - Vermin of Calradia

« on: January 16, 2011, 11:12:48 am »

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Outlaws, cut-throats, purse-cutters, scumbags, rapists, molesters, pyromaniacs, thieves, rogues, brigands, murderers, backstabbers, whore-hunters, robbers, plunderers, looters, pillagers, blackmailers, vigilantes, thugs, burglars, larcenists, shoplifters, fraudsters, scoundrels, villains, rascals, scallywags, swines, bastards, assholes, good-for-nothings, sons-of-bitches, offsprings, mongrels, crooks, charlatans, ruffians, muggers, felons, graverobbers, pedophiles, necrophiles, pickpocketers, plagiators, raiders, rustlers, snatchers, perverts, degenerates, sadists, sadomasochists, bullys, roughnecks, hooligans, hoodlums, punks, bootleggers, bribers, conspirators, opium dealers, smugglers, assassins, rippers, butchers, brutes, savages, pranksters, harrassers, executioners, vandals, heathens, pagans, infidels, traitors, culprits, usurpers, defilers, polluters, maggots, abusers, psychopaths.....

....sinners, sickmen, mugfaces & criminals of all kinds & shapes.....you name it - we have it, in one word: Bandits. The Vermin of Calradia.

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Clan Tag
Bandit_


Members:

Gnjus the Vulture

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Gnjus is a veteran of more battles than he can remember. Former mercenary captain, now leader of Calradian bandits he is renown for his endless drinking & screwing (women ofc) sessions throughout numerous taverns of Calradia. Feared and hated by men, adored by women he continues to wage his own little wars whenever it suits him. While not drinking & screwing women he spends his time hunting for archers of all kinds & shapes. Those who dont run away usually end up skinned and hanged on the nearest tree. And burned, just in case.

Fasader the Abuser
Dado the Backstabber

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Dado's childhood was terrible, because he was raised in an orphanage, and never knew his parents. For very long time, he was loved by nobody. As a matter of fact, whether it was because of his exceptional ugliness,  his foul mouth, or his nasty habit to rape puppies, Dado was the most disliked child in the whole orphanage. Dado hated orphanage and all the other kids. He did all he could to gain their trust and then to betray them at the worst possible moment. After being thrown out of the orphanage and having his penis cut off because he mistaken one of the headmistress's cats for a puppy, Dado wandered the Calradia alone since he was twelve. This trauma had as a consequence that his favorite weapon became the long spear (the longer the better!), cause that was the only way Dado could cope with his loss.
One day he stumbled upon a tavern on the edge of a forest and was drawn in by a mouthwatering smell of ćevapi (kebabs). Inside, Dado saw a man making kebabs from the meat of puppies, while the group of other men was resting and drinking beers. To his amazement, the man looked just like him, only older. Man looked at him, and in the split second they both realized the truth.  "Dado", the man said, "I am Gnjus, your father.  And these are my bandits."  At that moment, Dado had a strange feeling that he finally found his family. Of course, since Dado didn't have penis anymore, the bandits made him sleep in a pit behind the tavern. This wasn't too much of a problem for Dado, as he uses his long spear to climb in and out of his pit.

El Supreme Pickpocket

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The son of his mother and father, born in ugly village called Donja Pripizdina, young El was raised by no moral standards. He was very poor, and only way to have shiny objects, which were his addiction, was pickpocketing from wealthy merchants who were traveling nearby. The rumor was that he even stole unborn child from a pregnant maid, nobody knows how, and traded it for a shiny knife. One day in the tavern, as he was observing drunk bumps, searching for shiny things, he spotted a sword of a very ugly mean looking man, and was so attracted to it that he had to make his move. His agility was extraordinary, and with 3 swift  moves he slide sword to his inner pocket of his long coat. When he was close to exit, one of the drunk bumps unintentionally pushed him, sword fell on the floor, and the mean man's sharp eyes spotted it. Impressed by El's skill Gnjus offered him a place in his band of brigands.

Gazda the Swine

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Born in Đelehovec, son of a local farmer. From earliest stages of his life he was tought how to grow barley, wheat, rye, and other cereals. Though his father pushed him in agriculture, he had fetish for pigs. His father didn’t approve the idea of his son being a lowlife pig breeder so at the age of 12 he made a decision that will change his life. He took fathers hammer and killed him on sleep, took over the farm and turned it into a giant pig farm. Later on he found out he was allergic to corn, which was the only food he was able to give to his pigs, so he stopped working as a pig breeder. That stung his hearth, he killed all the pigs on the farm, took his horse and rode to the south, where he met Gnjus, former mercenary captain, now just a scumbag and lowlife. He met him in Tavern in Kloštar podravski, they both got drunk , after being intoxicated for a while, Gnjus tried to rape him. As soon as Gnjus made his first move,he reached out for his sword and leaned it on Gnjus’ throat, and said: “Nobody fucks with me”. Gnjus, stuned by his reaction, pulled back his body from him, and said: ”I am impressed, Whats your name, come join me and my fellow bandits”. He replied: ”I am Gazda_the_Swine”

Fićo the Pagan
Umbra the Honorless (former Ban Josip Jelacic)

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Umbra the honourful, he was a veteran of many wars, so devoted was he to battle that he named himself after his sword, the Umbra. After countless years of war all he wanted was to die in a honorable duel. Many had fought him and lost, shining knights, nobility and common folk alike. One day after beating another knight he was resting and preparing  for the next chalenger when he smelled a foul scent in the air, then he saw him: a wretched looking man, in rags and rusted armor with a vicious look on his face and a large nose that dominated his wrinkeled face. "So, another one has come to challenge me" Umbra said with a faint smile on his face. The reply came as an axe, flying trough the air and barely missing Umbras head. "How dare you! Without even anoucing a duel!" The smile was gone, replaced with a expression filled with rage. A vicious fight erupted. The rugged man slashed, hacked, kicked and even bitten.  So much different from the usual opponents who played by the rules. But Umbra was a veteran and he deflected every blow, then he went to his sword dance, elegant and deadly. He disarmed the Wretch and threw him to the ground. "HA!" He said with glee and moved  in for the killing blow. But just as he was about to strike the vicious man took a dagger from his back and slashed at Umbras sword hand! The slash was followed with a kick to the groin and this time Umbra was on the ground, disarmed, with a dagger to his throat.  "A hidden weapon? have you no honor?!" Umbra screamed in disbelief. "I fight dirty but i win" the rugged man replied calmly. "No! This is not how i should die, tricked by a scoundrel!" Umbra shook his head. "Then i wont kill you, but you owe your life to me!" The scoundrel said and offered Umbra his hand. "Why should i join with such an honourless man?!" "How many plated knights have fallen by your hand, and i defeated you with a mere dagger" The man said with a vicious smile on his face still holding his hand forward. "The name is Gnjus" he continued "Now take my offer or die here by a treacherous scoundrels trick". Umbra reluctantly took his hand not knowing what the future would bring.

Prpavi the GTXter

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Son of a local shaman and one of him many prostitute wives, Prpavi was exposed to drugs and sexual deviancy form the earliest age. Heavy drug potions made him bipolar and half of the time in uncontrollable violent rage. He grew to an ustable teenager more and more engulfed in the world of heavy opium/absinth potions and many mushrooms and halucinogen herbs, witch just enhanced his schitzophrenia and deviant behaviour. one night in extreme dellusional rage Prpavi killed his fathers harem including his mother. Pealed his fathers face witch he wears inside his helm thinking it gives him courage and his fathers magical shamam skills, and burned the whole village to the gound, yound and old alike, taking with him only his helm and a generations old Greatsword.
He continued to wander aimelessly around the highlands and deserts alike plundering villages, showing no mercy especially for the weaklings tying to defeat him with bow and arrow. He developed an extreme diguist over the years for the things twrown at him and people doing it, he would stop at nothing to get them. man or woman, child or old, a mere pebble thrown at him is enought to put him into a violent trans like state.
One cold night in a tavern he met a man so vile only he himself could match it, that man was Gnjus_the_Quarrelsome. Together they made a pact to pillage the town and share the spoils, from that day on he joined his pack of Bandits and the best is yet to come...

Kriza the Prankster
Sanader the Asshole (former Obelix)

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Sanader is a former politician. After being arrested for corruption and embezzlement, he managed to escape the prison by dressing up as a schoolgirl (his mistress smuggled the clothes in the prison). Being chased internationally throughout Calradia, he one day met Gnjus and asked if he could join the clan. Gnjus hesitated, because former politicians are too crooked and corrupted even for this group, but eventually gave in, since Sanader begged so hard and promised he would dress up as a schoolgirl occasionally.

Ass-hard-on the HarrASSer
Prance the Addict
Kukurutz the Cornflake
Shpritza the Mighty Ganjar
Corwin the Lazy

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Gnjus found Corwin lying on the tavern floor one day when he was returning from pillaging. Corwin wasn't drunk, he was just too lazy to sit. Since he was looking for a honest week's pay for an honest day's work Gnjus offered him to join his bandits. Although very difficult to move and slow to react, whenever decides to join the clan in a battle he is fearsome, cause the prospect of lying on the battlefield doesn't scare him at all.

Tomo the Psychopath

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The son of a whore and a deranged lunatic imprisoned for public urination on statues of saints. This humble man has had a hard, traumatic life. From his early age, where he learned the differences between man, woman, and the ones who's privates he cut off, to his teen years, when he learnt that thievery ain't the only lifestyle to be had, but that racketeering was also quite profitable. For he had earned a truly disgusting, ugly and disfigured face (probably from his mother's side) as he grew up, the scars, cuts, bruises and broken bones piled up in the mess he today calls a face. He had earned many names throughout the years, bonechewer, cresent daisy, red sea, monstrous jollycrab, tornado tongue (given to him by several ladies), and many many more. Yet his newest name is the one that would define his future career, and it all started on one rainy evening, in a tavern by some rather unknown lake. You see, he was already quite famous for his tendencies to impale his enemies upon an awlpike through their assholes. And so this one evening he encountered a rather hideous looking man. The man took a liking to our "handsome" stranger and challenged him to a duel. Little did he know, that this man was none other that Gnjus, a rugged and terrifying bandit of some repute. The fight was fearsome, shields bashed against each other, swords and pikes clashed, the sound of metal clanking filled the rainy evening. After a long and gruelling duel, gnjus layed on the ground, his weapon thrown away and a pike pointed at his face. Our jolly murderer said in a raspy voice "Flip over bitch..", as Gnjus flipped over, wondering what fate might await him, our murderer started to ram his pike into Gnjus's ass, but alas, to his surprise, he did not hear a scream or swears...he heard..a moan, a moan of pleasure! He immediately pulled the pike out and told the man that he had never met someone who might be crazier than himself, but now he finally has, and that he shall be granted clemency for this act of lunacy. Gnjus stood up off the ground and offered his hand to the man, inviting him to join his group of bandits, to pillage and burn as they please as long as they can. Our murderer accepted, and after that, Gnjus shook his hand and said that he is a true Psychopath.

Panos the Unlucky Cunt
El Infante the Ripper
Cepeshi the Bloodsucker

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He, the one with no shadow, was travelling the lands of Calradia for many centuries already. He saw many reigns formed and fell, many good warriors rise and then put their last breath on the field fighting for weird ideas of people he even never saw in his life. He tried to lay low and just blend in with the community, but as the years passed, settlements were created and it was hard for a stranger to stay unnoticed. He roamed the lands like every few years in order to protect his dark secret. One sunny day, while crossing deserts, he heard sounds of a huge battle. Then he met a group of travellers on a hill, and asked them: "Yo mateys, what is the battlin about?" And got answer from a man with heraldic armor: "This battle lasts for long, most of our brothers are dead, we are the last stand, when the enemy finishes with our brothers in arms, we are the last people to stop them."
And thus he joined them. They waited for some time untill the enemy was finished with the guys under the hill and started climbing up. They had no idea what deadly trap awaits them!

After a cruelsome struggle, our group of heroes stood on the hill and enjoyed the smell of fresh intestines and blood lying all over the place.

"Who are you, traveller?" i was asked.
"I am known by the name of Tepes, son of Cepeshi, from the land of Drakulesci."
From that day, he joined the group of Bandits in order to enjoy slaughter, which he forgot was so much fun! For his cruelsome acts on the battlefield he is now known as a Bandit Tepesh the Bloodsucker.

Idžo the Thug

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Idzo was a normal peasant who worked hard in the fields. As a baby he was adopted by Pička Materina and Kita Velika. 
He was desperate cause he couldn't find his real parents and brother but always kept it inside. He knew that somewhere in Calradia he had a brother named Dado who was wandering around. One day in a tavern on the edge of the forest, after he got drunk, he fell in the pit that was located behind the tavern. There he met a guy who resembled him very much. The guy helped him with his pike to get out. It turned out that the pit dweller is Dado, his long lost brother. Soon after that Idzo met Dado's father Gnjus, who immediately recognized the face of his ex whore in Idzo and realized that Idzo is his younger son. In the morning Gnjus and Idzo went to Idzo's home farm, to grab some clothes and trident so they met Idžo's step-father, Kita Velika. He clearly wasn't happy when he heard that Idzo is leaving with Gnjus and rest of the Bandits so he attacked Gnjus but Idzo quicky pulled his knife and stabed Kita Velika, cut his throat and saved Gnjus's life.
Idzo is the youngest and definitely Gnjus's favorite Bandit.

Skawtish the Pervert
Berserker the Maggot
Anurin the Annoying
Intell the Fearless
Stifilis the Sick
Bosco the Impatient
Leshma the Bicurious
Matko the Unknown Soldier


...and many more wannabees....


Teamspeak channel:

213.149.60.42:10030

For password send me a PM, i don't want any honest men connecting to our TS. 

P.S. we usually gather up in the evening, don't be surprised if you find it empty during the day.


Rules & Requirements:

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1. Listening to me
2. Following me
3. Having a mugface (some examples follow)

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Diplomacy:

When we come - you run.

174

General Discussion / A simple question

« on: January 07, 2011, 08:47:42 am »

In the recent flood of useless post-patch threads all over the two forums i have a simple question to ask: if a person A splits the skull of a person B with a certain weapon, then the person B should end up dead in most cases, correct ? Cause recently its not really happening. A person A, with 18 strength, power throw 6 and "heavy" throwing axes keeps headshoting various persons but they just refuse to die.
I can live with the fact that you place up to 4 of those "heavy" axes to some people's body and they still keep running around joyfully as if they just won the god damn calradian lottery while in the same time you get instantly killed by things like war darts (1shoted, full health, body hit not a headshot, cour bouili over mail, etc) on a regular basis but a headshot should get the job done, wouldnt you say ? I mean seriously......what kind of a game are we playing here ? Some fantasy/magic where people run around with axes sticking out of their split skulls ? Whats next ? Having a lance in your ass which you shoot out by farting, so you can hit the guy that is running after you ? 7 out of 10 direct heavy throwing axe headshots dont kill people, instead of it you see them running like nothing hapened. Its not easy to hit ANYTHING let alone the head but if thats normal, if those axes are really so worthless shouldnt they be lower in the buying/upkeep money chain since obviously everything is better then them ?
Just to make it clear: this is not a whining thread, i would just like to hear these so called experts and their opinion on the matter. If my logic is wrong i will gladly admit it, maybe im just a poor no-lifer who spends too much time sitting in front of his computer, while there are people out there evolving for over 2000 years into being capable of surviving their heads getting split on a regular basis. Hell, even modern weaponry cant get the job done anymore, let alone some miserable medieval throwing axes, right ?