Author Topic: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.  (Read 4244 times)

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Offline BoneSaw

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Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« on: September 11, 2013, 05:47:27 pm »
+22
  I was enjoying my usual morning breast milk bath when my peace and relaxation in exile was disturbed. I heard the dancing of steel in the hall outside the door and men shouting. Then in a flash the steel stopped ringing and the sound of footsteps accompanied by a strong leather smell approached the door. I waited in the tub for whoever was coming. Was it assassins here to kill me for my old war crimes? Are the rebels fighting each other? Who could it be? Then crash the thick oak door came smashing down like Warborn at the tavern on a Tuesday night. The first man in wasn't my prison guard but my very own bastard Jona and about a dozen loyalists. Jona gave me his hand as he helped me from the warm breast milk bath, threw me some HoC heraldic and said "time for the Hounds of Chulainn to rise again"... and so we shall. Hounds of Chulainn are back and declare independence from our caretakers(FCC). They have been great to us and we will never forget it! Let us continue to be great friends until the end of days.
« Last Edit: September 16, 2013, 08:01:58 am by BoneSaw »
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Offline Matey

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2013, 06:21:04 pm »
+6
Best of luck with your new endeavours ol chum!

Offline HarryCrumb

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #2 on: September 11, 2013, 07:43:28 pm »
+3
where is carac when you need him?

Offline Bittersteel

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #3 on: September 11, 2013, 08:01:17 pm »
-1
10/10 would read again! Excellent roleplay

Offline dynamike

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #4 on: September 11, 2013, 08:32:40 pm »
+18
"You are leaving? Impossible! Once an FCC vassal, always an FCC vassal."

dynamike's hand moved to his hip where "Firepube", his trusted slave whip made from Kesh's basement hair, was dangling. He unrolled the heavy, leathery whip that reeked of rancid tuna and started to deliver the first lashes on the backs of the oppressed FCC slaves... and much screaming commenced.

Alerted by the screams, Matey came running into the courtyard as fast as his peg leg would allow him and immediately grabbed dynamike by the wrist: "ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR you crazy, you fool? What ARRRRRRRRRRRRRR you doing here? You can't just whip people for no reason, you ARRRRRRRRRRRse!

Confused, dynamike tore his hand away from Matey and lowered Firepube. He turned to Matey and yelled "But, but, but these HoC guys wanted to leave us! They started barking up the wrong tree, so I gave these dogs the leash! No one of our vassals and other oppressed subjects shall ever leave us, NO ONE!"

Realization flickering in his eyes, Matey took dynamike by the shoulders and walked with him for a couple of steps. "You know these guys ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR not really our vassals, right? They ARRRRRRRR a free part of our free companies and ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR free to do as they like." He stuck his hand in the pocket of his captain's vest and handed dynamike a snickers. "Here, eat this. You always turn into a people pube whipping bastard when you ARRRR hungry. Better?"

dynamike took a bite and replied "Better. It's just that everyone else always says so, every member of every other clan... I guess I almost started to believe it for a second. Sorry about that. And good luck for the future, BoneSaw!"
For while the fire in the heart of a single Remnant still burns... can Stratia truly have fallen?

Offline TugBoat

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #5 on: September 11, 2013, 09:07:20 pm »
+1
TugBOAT, King of BOAT Clan scowled as the messenger raven arrived upon his windowsill. TugBOAT stood from his oak throne, covered in furs of the beasts he had hunted that winter before as he approached the bird. He wore nothing but the pale moonlight that shone through the window of his cottage, his masculine frame covered in the scars of many a hard fought battle.

He grabbed the bird's head in his thick fist, and removed the note from its talon.

"No, it can't be." TugBOAT exclaimed as his scowl turned darker and darker, the lines in his face deepening as he fought to suppress laughter. He could hold back no longer, and soon he erupted into laughter, slamming his warrior's fist down onto his desk as his booming laughter filled the stone walls.

"Ah, so the Hounds of Chalupa ride again.." Tears streamed down his cheeks as his chest rose and fell as he could barely breathe due to the laughter rocking his body. "Hide your husbands!"

TugBOAT returned to his bed, and rested soundly, knowing that nothing of any importance was relayed.
« Last Edit: September 11, 2013, 09:21:03 pm by TugBoat »

Offline Tanken

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #6 on: September 11, 2013, 10:13:56 pm »
+2
TugBOAT stood from his oak throne, covered in furs of the beasts he had hunted that winter before as he approached the bird. He wore nothing but the pale moonlight that shone through the window of his cottage, his masculine frame covered in the scars of many a hard fought battle.

Your roleplay sucks. You contradicted yourself. Tugboat, more like Chugchoad.

HA!
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Offline TugBoat

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #7 on: September 11, 2013, 10:17:11 pm »
+2
Your roleplay sucks. You contradicted yourself. Tugboat, more like Chugchoad.

HA!

"The throne is covered you ball lord. What is this roleplay you speak of? Why are you in my cootage?!"

TugBOAT blushed timidly as he stood naked in the moonlight, eyeing Tanken up and down as he entered TugBOAT's cottage. What did this strong, bearded warrior want?

Offline Adoptagoat

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #8 on: September 11, 2013, 10:34:31 pm »
+8
HOC SPLITS FROM ITS BENEFACTORS.  BREAKING NEWS FROM 6 MONTHS AGO!
« Last Edit: September 12, 2013, 02:16:26 am by Adoptagoat »
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Offline Lt_Anders

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Offline GOBBLINKINGREATLEADER

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #10 on: September 11, 2013, 11:18:06 pm »
+21
THE GOBBLIN GAYZETTE

BREAKING NEWS!

HoC, pictured here with their FCC overlords, has recently declared their independence!


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Here at THE GOBBLIN GAYZETTE we believe we have the same questions as all of you, important questions like;

Who gives a shit?
Aren't they the nerds AFK in a castle with 19,000 troops?
Why would they have become FCC vassals in the first place?
Aren't they all bad anyway?

Well we're here to find you all the answers you crave! Here are the answers to the above questions, brought to you after great research from investigative GOBBLIN journalist GADGETEERGOBBLINTHEGONADGOD:

(click to show/hide)

Well there you have it folks! Until next time, this is THE GOBBLIN GAYZETTE bringing the news right to you.

Offline KaMiKaZe_JoE

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #11 on: September 12, 2013, 02:12:40 am »
+20
Joe sat at the bar of a tavern inside the Jelbegi Castle. The other patrons, mostly soldiers bearing the heraldry of the FCC, avoided sitting near him. He was drunk, and in a dark mood. The Free Companies had lost every single one of their villages to an unholy alliance of Italians and homosexuals. Soon, these cruel invaders would begin attacking castles and cities. Cavalry was useless in castles and cities.

He was useless--powerless to stop the onslaught.

He swallowed the rest of his of Miller High Life. He threw the can over his shoulder, then reached into the dark, cardboard cavern of the half-empty thirty-pack on the counter and pulled out another beer.

The bartender, a fine Destrier, approached with some caution, a confused look on his dumb horse face. "My lord," he offered, "we have beer on tap if you'd like. We have lots of beer--you don't need to keep bringing your own."

Joe dribbled a mouthful of beer onto the counter. "Shut up."

"I-"

"Jesus, you don't even have hands. What the fuck are you doing back there?"

"You had the last bartender replaced, sir. Said you were more comfortable speaking with horses."

"Right you are." Joe sipped his beer, then turned in his seat and threw the can across the room. It exploded against a distant wall. He pulled a fresh one out of the box in front of him.

"Sir," the horse persisted, "Do you want to try one of our seasonal brews?"

Joe looked at the horse, silent. He drank from his can. The horse opened it's mouth to speak but Joe, still drinking, raised a finger. He drank at a slow, steady pace, his eyes locked on the horse's, until the can was empty, which took about five minutes. "Bartender," he declared, "This is the Champagne of Beers. The best brew in the world."

The animal didn't seem convinced, but nodded. "Right. Well, I guess you couldn't find a brew like it elsewhere. You could drink from one side of town to the other--do the whole village--and not find a thing like it..."

Joe wasn't listening. A voice echoed in his head, over and over. The whole village, the whole village, the whole village. He'd heard those words before, years ago...

In Vietnam.

Joe had been a rifleman--just another pair of boots. His platoon had been tasked with defending a little cluster of villages. A foolish assignment. He set up inside a hooch and waited. They sat there for hours, then days, waiting for the enemy was sure to come.

Then, one moonless night, the world reverberated with the crack of rifles and the screams of the dying. From his little house, Joe watched slivers of tracer fire stich themselves through the fabric of the night. Bullets hissed and cracked at super-sonic speeds around him, tearing through the dry lumber of the building he was in. After a few minutes the thing was ablaze, and Joe had to move--all this without firing a shot. He could only watch and run, helplessly, from fighting position to fighting position as they all were overrun by VC.

He got to his PL, in the heart of the surviving hamlet. The RTO was shouting grid coordinates into his handset. The PL looked at Joe, and at the wounded and dying around them all. He said to Joe, "Just run. We're dropping arty on us. We're gonna do the whole village if it means keeping it out of Charlie's hands."

Joe had ran, then.

A burst of clapping and laughter roused Joe from his flashback. He looked around the crowded tavern, which had broken into sudden applause. He was confused, some part of him still running through the dark jungles of south east Asia.

Joe grabbed at a passerby. "What the fuck's going on, sergeant?"

"Uh." The man swallowed, his eyes clearly recognizing Joe. "HoC is back apparently." The man shrugged. "Messenger came in and said so." He shrugged again, uncertain.

"Don't shrug at me boy, I was in the 'Nam."

"W-what?"

Joe stood, then peed himself. "I said," his voice rising, "VIETNAM!" He shoved past the man, cans of the Champagne of Beers clenched in each fist. He could hear the sound of gunfire and the scream of falling helicopters. Somebody--probably VC--stepped into his path.

Joe barked, then bit the man's face. He went down, hard, giving Joe room to leap out of the tavern and into the cool night air. He removed the rest of his clothing--finally free--and leapt onto the back of a passing horse. "TAKE ME TO CAMBODIA! WE NEED TO GET OUT!" he shouted. The animal leapt to his bidding, galloping towards the open castle gate and the safety of any place but there.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2013, 03:15:10 am by KaMiKaZe_JoE »
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Offline kasMVC

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #12 on: September 12, 2013, 02:16:31 am »
+3
Welcome back Bonesaw glad to see the HoC banner instead of whatever random, shit bad shit the nerds were wearing

Offline MURDERTRON

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #13 on: September 12, 2013, 02:17:00 am »
+2
Give me all of your troops... I have activities to attend to.
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Offline SMEGMAR

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Re: Return of the King. HoC going independent from FCC.
« Reply #14 on: September 12, 2013, 02:58:25 am »
+2
We will fight with glory and honor and steel we united will stand as one together under the fire blood king bonesaw the cruel we will strike in th night like a rising force forged from the flames of hell itself we are the blackness that waits in your dreams we are the attackers we will attack.
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