cRPG

Strategus => Diplomacy => Topic started by: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 05:04:07 am

Title: Dear James
Post by: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 05:04:07 am
To King 'Call me Caitlyn' James,

You spent the entirety of last strat troopfarming, ok.  Sure, everyone gets busy (you weren't, but we'll pretend you were) and sometimes has to just relax and do their own thing.

Then you make the only good decision you had ever made at that point and let someone else lead.  Oh wait, then you immediately try to turn them into a puppet king and have your guys break raid rules and gearbug.

You alienate the entirety of your clan, and make many of them so bored of your shit that they quit the game entirely or join a different faction.

With a ragtag band of loyal idealists you join a decent faction.  Taser's a smart guy, and you finally stop troopfarming.  You take some AI fiefs and seem to finally be doing something.

Then the laws of nature kick in and you squat over and take a giant steaming shit on the emaciated orphan child that is the physical embodiment of Acre, breaking through the crust of the Earth to somehow take yourself (and your clan) somehow even lower.

You bend over, distended anus and all, to the Gobblerinos, swearing your undying prison-bitchdom.  Then they (by they, I mean everyone living, dead, and yet to be born) make fun of you and put you up to some ridiculous challenge just to hoist you in front of the entire community as their ragdoll fucktoy.

You proceed to swallow the erroneous amounts of cum dribbling down your chin and show off your toothless hillbilly smile like some cock-bent Oliver Twist, tugging on Daruvian's spirally cock asking, "Please sir, may I have some more?"

On behalf of everyone in this entire community: holy shit.

You have set new records on low self-esteem and cuckoldry.

I hope for the ruined chasm that is your asshole that you finally muster up the courage of a dead squirrel and chirp out to your stank-dicked master that you refuse his offer of a Gobblin gangbang and make your own 3-man faction of cockgobblers like your destiny foretold.

Sincerely,
Another person who is so embarrassed of you it hurts.

And no, not your father.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Sandersson Jankins on March 04, 2016, 05:09:45 am
Quote from: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 05:04:07 am
To King 'Call me Caitlyn' James,

You spent the entirety of last strat troopfarming, ok.  Sure, everyone gets busy (you weren't, but we'll pretend you were) and sometimes has to just relax and do their own thing.

Then you make the only good decision you had ever made at that point and let someone else lead.  Oh wait, then you immediately try to turn them into a puppet king and have your guys break raid rules and gearbug.

You alienate the entirety of your clan, and make many of them so bored of your shit that they quit the game entirely or join a different faction.

With a ragtag band of loyal idealists you join a decent faction.  Taser's a smart guy, and you finally stop troopfarming.  You take some AI fiefs and seem to finally be doing something.

Then the laws of nature kick in and you squat over and take a giant steaming shit on the emaciated orphan child that is the physical embodiment of Acre, breaking through the crust of the Earth to somehow take yourself (and your clan) somehow even lower.

You bend over, distended anus and all, to the Gobblerinos, swearing your undying prison-bitchdom.  Then they (by they, I mean everyone living, dead, and yet to be born) make fun of you and put you up to some ridiculous challenge just to hoist you in front of the entire community as their ragdoll fucktoy.

You proceed to swallow the erroneous amounts of cum dribbling down your chin and show off your toothless hillbilly smile like some cock-bent Oliver Twist, tugging on Daruvian's spirally cock asking, "Please sir, may I have some more?"

On behalf of everyone in this entire community: holy shit.

You have set new records on low self-esteem and cuckoldry.

I hope for the ruined chasm that is your asshole that you finally muster up the courage of a dead squirrel and chirp out to your stank-dicked master that you refuse his offer of a Gobblin gangbang and make your own 3-man faction of cockgobblers like your destiny foretold.

Sincerely,
Another person who is so embarrassed of you it hurts.

And no, not your father.

I have a moderate like of James, as I tend to have for most everyone. I wasn't around at all for last strat, or maybe I was present in the beginning. I don't quite remember..must've done some cleaning in the old harddrive upstairs and accidentally some files, you know?

But regardless of all that, THAT was a good shitpost.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: xxkaliboyx on March 04, 2016, 05:16:34 am
Mygod. What a great time to be alive. Bravo

visitors can't see pics , please register or login
 

Edit: I saw a few people change their votes after Sandy's comment lol. Sorry, raging nerd borner since no work and ban
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 05:16:59 am
Oh and to the inevitable invitation to Gobblins for shitposting, go fuck yourselves with a rusty rake.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: ArysOakheart on March 04, 2016, 05:42:05 am
Daaaayuuum that was indeed a quality shitpost.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Ufoinsky on March 04, 2016, 05:44:38 am
GOD DAMN
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Gmnotutoo on March 04, 2016, 05:47:20 am
He is learning to play strategus well.

This guy has potential and I motion to make him the Leader of HoC.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Keshian on March 04, 2016, 05:54:21 am
Quote from: Sandersson Jankins on March 04, 2016, 05:09:45 am
I have a moderate like of James, as I tend to have for most everyone.

Ah, I feel loved!  :oops: :oops: :oops:


P.S.
(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Novamere on March 04, 2016, 06:40:01 am
Fuck i am so late to the party but god dam that was a great shitpost even though i like you and james haha.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:13:44 am
Quote from: Keshian_the_Grey on March 04, 2016, 05:54:21 am
You know I have talked to axeman and some others that still stick around with him.  They seem fine, its really just James, and the only reason they stick by him is more inertia and habit than anything else at this point.  Kind of a sad thing actually that the only people that still hang out with you only do it because they are too lazy or bored to find someone more interesting and less of a douchebag.[/spoiler]

Would you stop posting shit I'm inclined to upvote. Jesus fucking christ what is this mod cumming to.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: MURDERTRON on March 04, 2016, 07:15:31 am
Quote from: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:13:44 am
Would you stop posting shit I'm inclined to upvote. Jesus fucking christ what is this mod cumming to.

Sparvico confirmed FCC putie.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: mcdeath on March 04, 2016, 07:33:00 am
Quote from: MURDERTRON on March 04, 2016, 07:15:31 am
Sparvico confirmed FCC putie.

Sparvico has been officially banned from GOBBLIN TS and kicked from the faction.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:34:40 am
Quote from: mcdeath on March 04, 2016, 07:33:00 am
Sparvico has been officially banned from GOBBLIN TS and kicked from the faction.

Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: mcdeath on March 04, 2016, 07:37:46 am
Quote from: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:34:40 am

8/10 facts you read on the internet are made up fyi
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: kasMVC on March 04, 2016, 07:47:59 am
People like to shit on James but I think it's important to remember he isn't hoc
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:56:17 am
Quote from: kasMVC on March 04, 2016, 07:47:59 am
People like to shit on James but I think it's important to remember he isn't hoc

He's worse in every measurable way.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: ArysOakheart on March 04, 2016, 09:11:56 am
Quote from: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:56:17 am
He's worse in every measurable way.

Fuck you

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Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: njames89 on March 04, 2016, 12:28:04 pm
Very cute. Love you too slaugter  :)
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 03:31:55 pm
Quote from: kasMVC on March 04, 2016, 07:47:59 am
People like to shit on James but I think it's important to remember he isn't hoc

Yeah, that's his worst quality.

Takes a man who doesn't give a shit what people think about him to wear the proud green.

GREEN REGIME.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Nightingale on March 04, 2016, 06:03:21 pm
Quote from: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 03:31:55 pm
Yeah, that's his worst quality.

Takes a man who doesn't give a shit what people think about him to wear the proud green.

GREEN REGIME.

Chaos?
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on March 04, 2016, 06:24:37 pm
Pretty sure HoC suckers were Choad vassals at one point
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Gmnotutoo on March 04, 2016, 06:27:37 pm
Quote from: Nightingale on March 04, 2016, 06:03:21 pm
Chaos?

No LLJK.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Jona on March 04, 2016, 07:24:14 pm
Quote from: Nightingale on March 04, 2016, 06:03:21 pm
Chaos?

That's the equivalent of thinking "red white and blue" would refer to france.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Sparvico on March 04, 2016, 07:44:58 pm
Quote from: Jona on March 04, 2016, 07:24:14 pm
That's the equivalent of thinking "red white and blue" would refer to france.

Great Britain?
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: cup457 on March 04, 2016, 07:48:05 pm
Quote from: Jona on March 04, 2016, 07:24:14 pm
That's the equivalent of thinking "red white and blue" would refer to france.
thats like thinking red white and blue would refer to liberia and not USA
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Nightingale on March 05, 2016, 12:04:12 am
Quote from: Jona on March 04, 2016, 07:24:14 pm
That's the equivalent of thinking "red white and blue" would refer to france.

I'm pretty sure the green regime is in direct reference to the  Hospitaller/Chaos war in strat? 2 or 3?
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: CaptBob on March 05, 2016, 12:31:37 am
(click to show/hide)

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Lt_Anders on March 05, 2016, 01:23:09 am
Quote from: Nightingale on March 05, 2016, 12:04:12 am
I'm pretty sure the green regime is in direct reference to the  Hospitaller/Chaos war in strat? 2 or 3?

Strat 2. Where EU/NA where the same map.
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: CaptBob on March 05, 2016, 03:17:47 am
god just shut the fuck up already anders
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Nightingale on March 05, 2016, 03:45:25 am
Quote from: Lt_Anders on March 05, 2016, 01:23:09 am
Strat 2. Where EU/NA where the same map.

Thank you
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Lt_Anders on March 05, 2016, 03:53:03 am
Quote from: CaptBob on March 05, 2016, 03:17:47 am
god just shut the fuck up already anders

God, just continue your autisum bob
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: CaptBob on March 05, 2016, 04:18:21 am
You're worse than jeff, he laughs at his own jokes. take that in
Title: Re: Dear James
Post by: Built on March 05, 2016, 06:20:15 pm
Quote from: sLaughterino on March 04, 2016, 05:04:07 am
(click to show/hide)

This man has said all the things I didn't want to say. All the bad, disgusting, grizzly truths to this James fellow

Real talk how has james not been like strat crucified or something?