cRPG

Off Topic => Historical Discussion => Topic started by: Yachdiel on August 02, 2012, 11:10:29 pm

Title: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Yachdiel on August 02, 2012, 11:10:29 pm
http://sciencenordic.com/what-vikings-really-looked (http://sciencenordic.com/what-vikings-really-looked)

Thought I'd like to share this find here.

Five commonly held myths about what vikings looked like that are addressed:

    Vikings were dirty and unkempt
    Vikings wore horned helmets
    Vikings looked like we do today
    Vikings’ clothing style was admired throughout the world
    Vikings’ appearance was marked by battle wounds
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Osiris on August 03, 2012, 03:34:49 pm
cant say ive ever heard any of those myths except the horned helmet which i thought everyone knew was false O.o
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Joseph Porta on September 17, 2012, 03:35:35 pm
Horned helmets would be the gayest thing to equip in battle.  :lol:
Gay love handles.  :lol:
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Smoothrich on September 17, 2012, 03:56:34 pm
and jesus was black

recently discovered paintings from 30 AD found in Jerusalem confirm it

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Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Zanze on September 17, 2012, 07:38:53 pm
Anyone with half a brain could assume that vikings really didn't use horned helmets. (I hope)
Other than that, yeah, vikings and their hair/cleanliness was huge. Very similar to some Asian cultures. (Or if you want a movie thing, think the Dothraki in Asoif)

For the whole weapon thing, its generally the same as 99% of Europe. If it kills someone when you hit them with it many times, it is a weapon. Many peasant tools hurt on contact, so yeah it is generally a good read.

Everyone back then was shorter, so that isn't too crazy.

All in all, good read.

(13th warrior is a good movie to show some of this stuff. Based on Beowulf.)

Also, if you are interested in this kind of stuff, spend some time learning about random germanic "barbarians". You will find they aren't actually as savage as you might think.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Ubereem on November 17, 2012, 02:36:05 am
the gas chamber at auschwitz was built by the russians after the war
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Osiris on November 20, 2012, 09:41:11 pm
some things that annoy me :D
1. viking inst a race or people it is a word to describe an activity :D (the Saxons went viking too)
2. Beowulf is not fucking viking (scandies) its an Anglo-Saxon poem :D altho it is set in Scandinavia

Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: KaMiKaZe_JoE on November 21, 2012, 09:12:32 pm
”They had also conquered, or planned to conquer, all the country’s best cities and caused many hardships for the country’s original citizens, for they were – according to their country’s customs – in the habit of combing their hair every day, to bathe every Saturday, to change their clothes frequently and to draw attention to themselves by means of many such frivolous whims. In this way, they sieged the married women’s virtue and persuaded the daughters of even noble men to become their mistresses,” wrote Wallingford.

Not knowing jack shit about Vikings yet (gotta start my research paper soon, though), or knowing shit about the author of this source, other than that he was English (probably) and writing after the fact, I still think that the source is biased. Wallingford's painting a very deliberate picture of vikings as "frivolous" whimsical bundle of stickss that fucked the English's bitches.

Tastes like bias.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Adamar on November 26, 2012, 12:08:59 am
Also viking used maille and cloth armor, not leather or any form of plate.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Torben on November 26, 2012, 12:33:41 am
Quote from: Osiris on November 20, 2012, 09:41:11 pm
some things that annoy me :D
1. viking inst a race or people it is a word to describe an activity :D (the Saxons went viking too)
2. Beowulf is not fucking viking (scandies) its an Anglo-Saxon poem :D altho it is set in Scandinavia

arent you mixing that up with vandals?
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: polkafranzi on November 26, 2012, 07:31:54 am
I get my history knowledge from cRPG so this is how I thought they looked:

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Taser on November 26, 2012, 09:30:58 am
I thought they did have horned helms but they were decorative. If they didn't have horned helms at all, how did the idea of vikings and horned helmets come about?
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: IR_Kuoin on November 26, 2012, 09:58:41 am
Atleast they didn't use kuyaks with vaegir warmasks and danish greatswords.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Osiris on November 26, 2012, 07:58:19 pm
Quote from: Torben on November 26, 2012, 12:33:41 am
arent you mixing that up with vandals?


which part? that beowulf is a saxon peom or that viking means raiding/adventuring?
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Torben on November 26, 2012, 08:11:46 pm
Quote from: Osiris on November 26, 2012, 07:58:19 pm

which part? that beowulf is a saxon peom or that viking means raiding/adventuring?

viking as a verb.  dont think it is nowadays,  but then again esl here
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sandersson Jankins on November 29, 2012, 11:46:16 pm
Quote from: Zanze on September 17, 2012, 07:38:53 pm
Anyone with half a brain could assume that vikings really didn't use horned helmets. (I hope)
Other than that, yeah, vikings and their hair/cleanliness was huge. Very similar to some Asian cultures. (Or if you want a movie thing, think the Dothraki in Asoif)

For the whole weapon thing, its generally the same as 99% of Europe. If it kills someone when you hit them with it many times, it is a weapon. Many peasant tools hurt on contact, so yeah it is generally a good read.

Everyone back then was shorter, so that isn't too crazy.

All in all, good read.

(13th warrior is a good movie to show some of this stuff. Based on Beowulf.)

Also, if you are interested in this kind of stuff, spend some time learning about random germanic "barbarians". You will find they aren't actually as savage as you might think.

While the 13th warrior is based vaguely on Beowulf, it was actually adapted from a Micheal Crichton book entitled "Eaters of the Dead" that was later republished as "The 13th Warrior" when the film came out. If you enjoy reading, I would certainly recommend it, along with just about anything that Crichton published.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eaters_of_the_Dead
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: John_Merz on December 07, 2012, 07:04:48 am
That post is historically inaccurate.  Check out this picture to explain the standard viking so you all know what they were truly like.

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 (http://postimage.org/)

(I drew it all using MS Paint.)
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: IR_Kuoin on December 07, 2012, 10:20:26 am
Well that picture was a really accurate representation of my ancestors, but viking helmets with horns? There's only been found one viking helmet that sort of looks like it has horns in whole Scandinavia :/
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: spiritus on April 15, 2014, 08:13:18 am
what horns have so much practical use, you can fucking headbutt people... well if they dont grab your horns pull your head down and puncture a vessel in your neck first.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Taser on April 15, 2014, 08:23:42 am
Quote from: spiritus on April 15, 2014, 08:13:18 am
what horns have so much practical use, you can fucking headbutt people... well if they dont grab your horns pull your head down and puncture a vessel in your neck first.

Dat fucking bump.

Also I need to rewatch 13th warrior.. only time I saw it I was sick as fuck and remember like 2 minutes of the whole movie.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: IR_Kuoin on April 15, 2014, 12:31:12 pm
What is up with the necros already? 1 year older thread each time.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Oberyn on April 19, 2014, 01:38:23 pm
Quote from: HESKEYTIME on April 15, 2014, 11:38:08 am
What's the name of that opera with 'Ride of the Valkyries'? Pretty sure the myth came from there, the villian had to have horns cos villian, and it was all Scandinavian themed, thus the horned helmet was born and made popular. And there was a general romanticization of Vikings, Greeks etc in 'modern' art ('modern' meaning last 400ish years lol).

There were decorative golden horned helmets in the Bronze Age, before Scandinavia's formal 'Viking Period'.

Ther romantization/mythification of vikings and germanic peoples happened in the 19th and 20th century, mostly linked to a growing pan-germanic sentiment that coalesced into unification of a bunch of smaller german states into one nation. Not to mention the whole racial classification philosophy that grew from it, in which germanics and specifically northerners were placed at the top. 
Also pretty sure it's the valkyries who wore the horned helmets. Every stereotype of the "fat lady singing" (as in it's not over til the fat lady sings) is always some fat, matronly woman with blonde tresses and a horned helmet.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Olwen on April 19, 2014, 07:31:47 pm
(click to show/hide)

Jesus was a jew and therefore he cannot be black. Cut your heresy, american scum.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: //saxon on April 20, 2014, 07:25:10 pm
i typed Viking in Google Images and on the first line was this picture. its all true, google said so.  :wink:
(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Kafein on April 28, 2014, 12:06:01 pm
Quote from: IR_Kuoin on November 26, 2012, 09:58:41 am
Atleast they didn't use kuyaks with vaegir warmasks, Rus cavalry boots, plate mittens and katanas.

Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on May 10, 2014, 08:42:11 am
we all prefer to look clean and smell nice. but if a man is unable, so be it.

3-4 months on a pre-historic boat wont make you a model :p
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: HarunYahya on May 14, 2014, 05:24:24 am
Well...
History is written in most dramatic way possible so when Vikings start raiding towns,exterminating populace they earned their "Barbarian" title. Like Turks. Like Mongols.

Imagine getting slaughtered by some people who wears stuff you haven't seen and fights in a completely different way than you. You'll alianate them and call them Barbars,savages and shit and fear takes over the rest.

Same happened in first crusade,turkish expansion,mongolian invasion,viking raids,attacks on mayans and aztecs,third reich total war.
If you scare people they'll spread the word with even more horror and once it's there, your enemies will be so scared to fight against you which will make your expansion easier.

So adding Horns, filthy clothing and barbarian looking might be an addition in European's eyes just to fully agree on they are demons sent by lucifer. Religion has an important role, declare a man heretic, you'll find warriors to fight them.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: CrazyCracka420 on May 14, 2014, 11:36:40 pm
Sounds like turk propaganda   8-)
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: engurrand on May 15, 2014, 06:02:10 am
no pictures?

fucking garbage
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 14, 2014, 07:11:00 pm
I think the horns has been mixed with the similar Belgian (Germanic? i think they were back then) Vikings, many of them did actually have wings and horns on their helmets.

Goscinny and Uderzo was actually quite accurate :)

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(pretty sure this is a fact, i use to be semi-hardcore Asterix-fan as well as Viking-fan, i cba to search google im pretty sure im right hehe but please by all means, correct if im wrong)

Horns on Scandi Vikings helms is unheard of though. Found zillionz of Viking helmets all over Scandi but not a single one with horns, not to my pretty good knowledge anyway.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Osiris on July 14, 2014, 10:59:17 pm
no non retarded fighter would put horns on a helmet :D way to catch the sword blow and lose vision at least rather than make it glance ^^
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 15, 2014, 11:51:07 am
Yeah, i guess horns and wings were more a sign of status and wealth and i suppose it could be used by chieftains and other important characters as part of the "official" wardrobe. If i were some badass guy who fought many battles and survived and was leading an entire village (back then it was alot!!), i wouldnt mind having some horns on my chief-crown  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 19, 2014, 02:49:39 pm
http://www.pinterest.com/taffycat/medieval-hair/

http://modernmedievalism.blogspot.dk/2012/10/scissors-or-sword-why-medieval-men.html (? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samson ?)
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Teeth on July 19, 2014, 03:14:19 pm
Quote from: Osiris on July 14, 2014, 10:59:17 pm
no non retarded fighter would put horns on a helmet :D way to catch the sword blow and lose vision at least rather than make it glance ^^
There are many examples of impractical gear being worn into battle throughout history. Historical warriors weren't always minmaxing, so in itself this is hardly a decisive argument.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Xant on July 19, 2014, 04:59:43 pm
Your opponent's sword getting stuck against a horn momentarily isn't necessarily a bad thing, either...
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 21, 2014, 11:23:55 pm
http://natmus.dk/en/historisk-viden/danmark/oldtid-indtil-aar-1050/vikingetiden-800-1050/vaaben/hjelme/

Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: rebbrown on July 22, 2014, 01:14:54 pm
Quote from: Xant on July 19, 2014, 04:59:43 pm
Your opponent's sword getting stuck against a horn momentarily isn't necessarily a bad thing, either...

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Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 22, 2014, 01:27:17 pm
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Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Xant on July 22, 2014, 01:43:32 pm
Quote from: rebbrown on July 22, 2014, 01:14:54 pm
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Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: BlindGuy on July 22, 2014, 01:51:49 pm
Sooo we have necroed a thread from years ago that basically points out that despite what holywood and others have done, the norse ppl who went raiding from the pretty inhospitable lands in scand-fjords to softer lands in Brit-isles and northern side of EU mainland, were, infact, human beings, and like all human beings they liked to be:
comfy, attractive to opposite sex, decent at fighting when they had to

and they strove for:

land to live and grow food on, social security, as few hardships as possible.


Good, good, turns out those humans were humans after all. Great work. Investigative prowess.
Title: Re: What Vikings really looked like. (Spoiler: They looked like women)
Post by: Sniger on July 22, 2014, 02:11:55 pm
Quote from: spiritus on April 15, 2014, 08:13:18 am
what horns have so much practical use, you can fucking headbutt people... well if they dont grab your horns pull your head down and puncture a vessel in your neck first.


NECRO!!!!!!!!